Do I know you?
by Rodea McWin
Summary: After an accident leaves Ryan with amnesia, the team try to help him regain his memories. They soon learn how little they actually know about their fellow CSI.
1. Chapter 1

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Ryan was pissed. His car had decided to die on his way home last night and the shop that looked at it this morning said it would cost about $1500.00 to get it fixed. He didn't have that kind of money on hand so he would have to once again use his charge card to pay for the repairs. He felt like he was never going to get out of debt if things like this kept happening to him.

Luckily he was able to get a ride to work but when he asked if anyone could drive him home later he found out his luck had run out. They either said they were going the other way or that they didn't have time to drop him off. He would have to take the city bus home and he hated taking the bus. It was so full of germs. But he didn't really want to walk home so the bus would have to do.

After work he waited at the bus stop. He had been waiting for about 30 minutes before his bus finally pulled up to the curb. He had figure he would get off at the stop on Lexington and then be able to hop another bus that would take him close to his condo. He never could understand how they chose the bus routes, but he was grateful he only had to two buses to ride. He knew of one of his co-workers who said it took 6 buses to get home.

As soon as Ryan entered the bus he saw that it was only half full. He was grateful for this since it meant he could have a seat all to himself. He chose a seat closer to the back door so he could slip out easily when his next stop came up; but he had to endure at least 10 stops before his came up.

At about stop number 5 he noticed two men who had just come aboard. He thought it was odd that these men were both wearing long coats. The day had been a hot one and the night was still just as hot so long coats were the last thing anyone would be wearing.

He did not have a good feeling about them so he decided to keep an eye on them. They sat a few seats behind the driver. The seat between them and the driver was occupied with a young man and woman who appeared to be a couple.

Ryan could not help but notice that the 2 men were leaning heavily in the direction of the young woman. He wondered if they were giving her a hard time. It didn't take long to for their activity to anger the man sitting with the woman. He turned around in his seat and said something to one of the men. From Ryan's point of view whatever was said didn't seem to go over well.

The man sitting directly behind the young woman's companion gave a back handed swipe to the young man's head. This only angered the young man even more; enough for him to stand up and confront the men sitting in the seat directly behind him and his girlfriend. He started yelling at the two men in coats, which caused them both to stand up from their seats and move into the isle of the bus.

Ryan didn't really want to interfere with their argument, but the two men in coats seemed like the kind who enjoyed making trouble and were good at it. Ryan didn't want this to escalate to anything further so he decided to stand up "Hey, Why don't the 3 of you take your seat and at the next stop two of you should leave the bus".

One of the men in coats turned and looked directly at Ryan "Hey, why don't you mind your own business". The man then turned his attention back to the young couple.

By now the young woman had also stood up to help defend her boyfriend, but she found herself staring mostly at the back of her boyfriend.

There was a lot of shouting going on and Ryan thought he better go over and flash his badge and make them break it up. He couldn't believe the bus driver had not done anything to stop this, but he figured the driver was probably used to upsets on his bus and had learned to tune them out.

Ryan started making his way up toward the front of the bus when the taller of the two men in coats suddenly whipped out a gun from his side. He pointed it directly at the young man's chest. Ryan's years of training took over as he whipped his own gun out and shouted "Miami Dade Police, put your gun down".

As the man with the gun started looking back toward Ryan's voice the young man directly in front of him reached for the gun. As the man holding the gun felt this he instinctively pulled the trigger, only it did not hit its intended target. Instead it struck the bus driver in the back causing him to fall forward on the steering wheel.

Before anyone of the bus could do anything about the driver the bus ran over into the other lane and into the direct path of a rather large semi truck.

Ryan never had a chance to react. He was thrown around in the bus along with the other people as the bus made contact with the front of the semi truck. After the two collided the bus was smashed in the front and flipped over a few times tossing everyone inside.

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Horatio and Calleigh were still on duty when they got a call about a 2 vehicle collision involving a bus and semi truck. They were told that there were casualties and that the cause of the accident was yet to be determined.

Horatio knew that Eric and Ryan were already off duty so he called in part of the second shift team to handle the situation. Since he was still at work he decided to go and help with the scene. Any collision involving a bus was never good, especially if it was full of people.

As he was walking out to his hummer he ran into Calleigh. She said that she getting off work in a few minutes but didn't mind helping out.

It didn't take long for the Horatio and Calleigh to arrive at the scene. The traffic was heavy, but they knew to get out of the way of a hummer with its sirens going.

The scene that awaited them was horrific. The bus was completely smashed up. It looked like the semi truck only suffered minor damage and Horatio could see that the driver of the truck was being attended to. He walked over to one of the officers who was at the site, "Do you know how many people were on the bus?"

The officer turned around at Horatio's question "From what we could tell there were about 12 people on the bus. They were able to get 8 of them out of the bus, but I think they are working on getting the other people out. They are in a pretty mangled part of the bus". The officer pointed to the area of the bus where a large group of people were gathered.

"Thanks, I think I will see if I can offer any help". Horatio saw that Calleigh was already making her way over and went to join her.

Calleigh looked over at Horatio. "I can't believe anyone could survive this crash. This bus looks like one of those crushed soda cans on the side of the road".

"I agree. From what the officer told me they think there were at least 12 people on the bus and they were working on getting the last 4 out of the most damaged part". Horatio pointed to the area of the bus where people were working on cutting someone out.

Horatio went over to talk to man in charge."Hey, do you need any help?"

The fire and rescue chief looked up from his position to acknowledge Horatio's presence. "Yes we could actually use all the help we could get. We have almost reached the section of the bus that took the hardest hit. I don't know exactly how many people are in there, but it looks like there are at least 4 people. We pulled out 8 so far with only one casualty; the bus driver".

Horatio thought they were lucky to have only had one death so far, but from the looks of this section he wasn't so sure there would only be one death tonight.

After helping to clear out some debris from the area one of the rescuer's shouted "Were through, I can see at least 4 people inside. Were gonna need some help over here".

Horatio and Calleigh both went over and waited for them to bring out the first victim. It seems to take forever, but finally they saw two of the men bring out a man on a back board. Horatio assisted one of the EMT with the stretcher and moved it closer to the injured man.

As Horatio grabbed one end of the back board to get it on the stretcher he saw Calleigh come up and heard her say "Oh my god, it's Ryan".

Horatio looked down at the person on the stretcher and saw Ryan lying there looked bloody, bruised and battered.

The thought of providing assistance at the crash site instantly disappeared from Horatio and Calleigh's minds once they found out one of the victims of the crash was one of their own. They both helped get the stretcher over to the awaiting ambulance where a couple of EMT starting checking Ryan over.

Calleigh couldn't help but notice how awful Ryan looked. They had him strapped to the board with a neck brace on, but his face was all bloody and his arm looked like it was sitting at an odd angle. She wondered why he was on the bus, but quickly remembered him asking her for a ride saying his car was in the shop. She had told him she wouldn't be able to, but now she wished she could go back in time and change that. She hoped he would be alright.

After the EMT were finished they had Ryan hooked up to an IV bag and had placed a breathing mask on his face. Horatio walked over to Calleigh as they were loading Ryan into the ambulance "I'm going to ride with Ryan to the hospital. I think the other team can handle processing the site if you would like to take the hummer and follow us".

Calleigh looked relieved at the thought of going to the hospital with Horatio. She wanted to make sure Ryan was going to be ok. "Sure, I'll meet you there right after I go and check with the others to let them know we are leaving".

Calleigh watched as the ambulance sped off with their lights blaring. She hoped Ryan was going to ok.

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As Horatio was watching Ryan lying in the back of the ambulance he had to wonder why Ryan was on the bus. He never took the bus since he preferred to drive his own car to work. But it didn't really matter why he was on the bus; the only thing that mattered was getting Ryan to the hospital.

As Horatio was deep in thought, he was suddenly brought back to the present situation by the sound of someone coughing. His eyes immediately focused on Ryan; he notice the breathing mask was off his face. Ryan must have used his good arm to take it off his face. "Ryan, can you hear me, are you all right?"

Ryan looked in the direction of the voice and weakly said "Do I know you?"

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Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed this. I actually had another story in mind to post as my third story, but this came to me the other morning and I felt like I needed to write this one first. I can't say this story will be very long, but I have thought that before with my first story. Please let me know what you think.


	2. Chapter 2

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After Ryan had asked Horatio who he was he slipped back into unconsciousness and remained that way for the rest of the ride. Horatio was hoping that he hadn't recognized him because he was in shock.

As soon as the ambulance arrived at the ER entrance Ryan was whisked away to one of the emergency rooms and Horatio was told to sit out in the waiting room. As soon as he took a seat he saw Calleigh rush through the doors. He stood up and flagged her over to where he was.

Calleigh wasted no time in getting to the hospital. As soon as she walked into the emergency room she saw Horatio stand up and wave her over. As she walked over to where he was waiting, she could tell by the look on his face that something was wrong.

"Horatio, have you heard anything yet?"

"No one has come out yet, but Ryan did wake up for a brief moment on the rider over". Horatio didn't know if he should tell her what he said since he was not convinced it was relevant. He didn't want Calleigh to worry if it turned out Ryan was just in a state of shock.

Calleigh could still tell by the look on his face that he seemed to know something "Are you sure you're telling me everything".

Horatio should had know better than to try and hide anything from her, she knew him to well. "Well, he did say something to me when he woke up, but I don't think it meant anything. I think he was still in a state of shock".

"What did he say?" Calleigh could tell it that whatever he said had affected Horatio.

"He asked me who I was. He looked at me like he truly didn't know who I was, but then he lost consciousness again and didn't wake up the rest of the ride over". Horatio paused before continuing, "But I am sure it was due to the shock of the accident".

Calleigh didn't like the sound of this, but she agreed with Horatio "Yes, I'm sure that's all it is".

Both Calleigh and Horatio took a seat and sat in silence until they saw someone who looked a doctor walking toward them.

"Are you here for Ryan Wolfe?" The doctor had been told there a few people waiting to hear about Ryan, but he was not given any names.

Horatio and Calleigh both stood up, but it was Horatio who said "Yes, how is he?"

"Are both of you family?" The doctor had to ask this required question before providing any answers.

Calleigh spoke this time "No, but he works with us at the crime lab. This is Lieutenant Horatio Caine and I am Calleigh Duquesne, CSI".

The doctor looked at Calleigh and introduced himself "I'm Doctor Lakken, I was the doctor attending to Mr. Wolfe. Does he have family in the area?"

"No, but I made a call to them while we were waiting. Can you tell us Mr. Wolfe's condition?" Horatio had left a message with someone but he had no idea if they had gotten it yet.

Dr. Lakken seemed satisfied with this. "Mr. Wolfe is in stable condition considering the type of accident he was in. He sustained a minor concussion from a small skull fracture along with a broken arm, multiple cuts and abrasions and some bruised ribs. I would say he was very lucky".

Calleigh was glad that he was in stable condition, but she hoped they would be allowed to see him "Can we see him?"

"Once he is moved to a private room you can go and see him, but for now he is still in the ER having a cast made for his arm. I will have a nurse come and talk to you when he has been moved. If you will excuse me, I have more patients to see". The doctor turned and walked back toward the ER.

Calleigh and Horatio could only sit back down and wait.

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Horatio's thoughts were disturbed by someone asking him if he was Lt. Caine. He looked up and found a nurse standing before him. "Yes, I am Lt. Caine". He looked quickly in Calleigh's direction and saw that she was sleeping in the chair next to his. It was late at night and they had been waiting for quite a while so he didn't blame her for being tired.

"We have just moved Mr. Wolfe to a private room on the third floor; room # 3429. I must warn you though, he seems very confused, but we attribute this to his head injury. Please keep your visit brief, Mr. Wolfe needs his rest".

"Thank you". Horatio watched as the nurse walked away before turning to wake Calleigh up. "Calleigh, time to wake up, they said we can go and see Ryan".

Calleigh woke up feeling a little groggy, but the mention of seeing Ryan made it all disappear. She got up and followed Horatio.

Once they reached room 3429 they found a few nurses inside tending to their patient. Horatio and Calleigh waited until they left before entering the room. Once they were inside the room Calleigh saw Ryan lying on the bed. He was very pale and had a bandage wrapped around his head. He also had a cast on his right arm. Calleigh thought it was probably a good thing that it was his right arm that was broken since he was left handed.

Calleigh was glad to see that Ryan was awake enough for visitors. She gave him a very warm yet worried smile and said "Hi Ryan, I am so glad to see you awake, how do you feel?"

Ryan looked up at her; he was so confused by everything that it was hard to hide it. He was told his name was Ryan and that he had been in an accident, but he could not remember who he was; let alone who this person was standing before him. He also took note of the man standing next to the woman and wondered who he was as well.

Ryan was scared and didn't feel good; which caused him to remain quiet after waking up in the ER, but for some reason he felt like he could trust the people who were in his room. "Um.. I feel Ok I guess, but I have to ask, who are you?"

Calleigh didn't know what to say at this statement. Horatio was also quiet so she assumed he was thinking the same thing. But she couldn't stand there for too long without saying anything. "It's Calleigh, don't you remember me".

Ryan looked even more confused "No, I'm sorry, but I don't. Are we related or something".

Calleigh smiled before saying "No, we work together as CSI at the Miami Dade Crime lab". Calleigh motioned her hand over to Horatio "And this is Horatio Caine, our lieutenant.

"Ok, but I'm sorry I still can't remember you. You said I am a CSI, what does that stand for?" At this point Ryan was struggling to keep his eyes open.

Horatio could tell that Ryan was tired "I can see you need your rest. We can talk more about this when you have had a good night's sleep. We'll be back later". Horatio knew that Calleigh would not want to leave but he gently took her arm and escorted her out of the room. He took one last glance at Ryan before leaving and saw that Ryan had indeed fallen asleep.

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As soon as she left the room Calleigh leaned against the closest wall "Horatio, he really doesn't remember us".

"Yes it appears that way, but I don't think we should jump to any conclusions just yet. The doctor did say he had a minor concussion. I would like to talk to his doctor to find out more". Horatio didn't know if his doctor was still around, but he needed to talk to someone.

Horatio and Calleigh walked over to the nurse's station that was not too far from Ryan's room. There were two nurses on duty so Horatio went over to the one who was closest "Excuse me, can you tell me if Ryan Wolfe's doctor is still here?"

The nurse looked up when she heard the question "He might be, let me check". She started typing in the computer and found out that Dr. Lakken was the patient's doctor. "You're in luck; Dr. Lakken is working a double shift and should still be around somewhere. I will page him for you if you like".

"Yes, thank you".

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Horatio and Calleigh didn't have to wait long before they saw the doctor walking toward them. "I was told you wanted to see me".

Horatio stood up and faced the doctor, "It's about Mr. Wolfe's condition. When we saw him earlier he didn't know who we were".

The doctor didn't seem surprised at this statement "Well, he did sustain a fracture near his temporal lobe so it's plausible he would have some memory loss. I have seen this before, but it is too early to worry about it. Depending on the severity of the damage the memory loss can just be temporary, but we won't know anything until we do a more extensive exam of his brain". He didn't know if this would satisfy the lieutenant but there was nothing more he could do until morning "I'll have the tests ordered first thing in the morning, but until then I would suggest you go home. Mr. Wolfe is in the best place he can be and you can come back to see him tomorrow".

Horatio knew he couldn't force them to do anything more tonight and the doctor was correct when he said Ryan was in the best place. "Thank you doctor, we'll be back in the morning".

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Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed chapter 2. Thanks to everyone who gave a review for chapter 1.


	3. Chapter 3

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By the time Horatio arrived at the hospital additional tests had already been run on Ryan. Horatio arrived outside Ryan's room just in time to see Ryan's doctor discussing something with one of the nurses.

Horatio stood and waited for the doctor to finish giving his instructions to the nurse, "Good morning doctor, how is Ryan doing this morning?"

The doctor turned and acknowledged Horatio "Morning Lt. Caine, Mr. Wolfe was in a lot of pain during the night so he didn't get much rest, but he appears to be feeling better this morning".

"What about the additional tests you were going to run, have they been done yet?" Horatio didn't have time to beat around the bush; he wanted to know more about Ryan's condition.

"He had the tests first thing this morning. From what I could tell there was very minimal damage to the temporal lobe so I wouldn't expect his memory loss to be permanent. But I must stress that everyone is different and they heal at a different rate, so don't expect changes right away. It's also possible he may never regain his memories. The brain is a curious organ and we struggle to understand it on a daily basis. My advice to you is to take it slow with him, but make sure he gets back to his life as soon as possible. Sometimes all it takes is seeing something familiar and everything else falls back into place". The doctor paused to give Horatio time to let this information sink in. "Now you said you called his family, can we expect them soon? The only reason I am asking is that family is going to be really important to him right now. He needs as many familiar things around him as possible".

"I placed a call with his father, but I have not heard anything back yet, but I am sure he will be calling". Horatio hoped this was true, but he was surprised that had not gotten a call back yet. He knew that if he had gotten a call about Kyle being in the hospital he would be here right now.

The doctor didn't really want to cut his conversation short, but he had other patients to see before leaving work "Well, if you have any other questions please do not hesitate to call. Here is my card and it has my personal number on it". He really didn't like giving out his personal number to anyone, but seeing his patient was a cop, he thought it would be ok.

Horatio took the offered card "Thank you doctor".

After the doctor had left Horatio knocked on Ryan's door before entering the room. The room had a steady beam of sunlight streaming in and Horatio could get a better look at Ryan. Other than looking tired, Horatio thought Ryan looked better. "Good morning Mr. Wolfe, how are you feeling?"

Ryan had a confused look on his face as he answered, "I thought my name was Ryan?"

Horatio suddenly realized he should have been careful how to address Ryan since he could not remember much "Yes, your name is Ryan, but I commonly refer to you as Mr. Wolfe at work".

"Oh, that would explain it, but do you call me Ryan outside of work then?"

Horatio didn't know how to answer that. He rarely saw him outside of work and when he did he still referred to him as Mr. Wolfe. "We don't really interact outside of work".

"Oh, so what kind of relationship do we have then?" Ryan was struggling to find out who he was so he didn't have a problem asking these types of questions.

Horatio was feeling even more uncomfortable than before "Well, you work for me at the Miami Dade Crime lab. You are a crime scene investigator and you work on determining various parts of the crimes that have been committed".

Ryan didn't feel like he got his answer, but he could tell the questions he was asking were making the man in his room uncomfortable. He decided to change the subject "Well what else can you tell me about me? Are my parents coming to see me, am I married, how old am I?"

Horatio could tell Ryan was starting to get overexcited by this, plus each of the questions was very personal and he didn't know if he was the right person to be answering them "I need you to slow down with your questions and take it easy. I can't imagine what you're feeling but I promise you all of your questions will be answered in due time. Right now I just want you to relax".

"Yeah, I am starting to feel tired. Maybe just a little nap will do me right. Are you going to be here when I wake up?" Ryan gave Horatio a big smile as he waited for the answer.

Horatio smiled back "I'm not sure, but there will be someone here from work when you wake up".

Horatio could tell this satisfied Ryan since he closed his eyes and started to drift off to sleep. Horatio walked out of the room and took this opportunity to call Calleigh, Eric and Natalia to see if one of them would be able to be here when Ryan woke up. He also placed another call to Ryan's father hoping he would answer this time, but all he got was his voice mail and he was forced to leave another message. He never really heard Ryan talk about his father so he had to wonder what kind of person he was. Actually all he knew about Ryan's family was that he had a father and a step mother and that they lived on the West Coast somewhere. As for Ryan's mother he knew that she had died when Ryan was a young boy.

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Ryan woke up feeling more rested and kind of hungry. He wondered if they would be bringing him any food soon. He also felt very sore and wondered if they were going to give him anymore of those wonderful little pain killers; he hoped so. His ribs were hurting almost as much as his arm was. The only thing that didn't seem to really bother him was his head. He decided to turn on the TV to see what was on.

As he sat there watching the television he was grateful when a nurse came in with lunch. "I see you're awake and just in time for lunch. I bet you're hungry?" She couldn't help but smile at him; he seems so innocent laying there.

"Oh, I'm starving, what's for lunch. But it probably doesn't matter, I don't think I can remember what types of food I like and don't like anyway". He took the cover off the plate on his tray and saw that it was mash potatoes and meatloaf with a side of creamed corn. He was so hungry that he dived in before realizing that he didn't thank the nurse "Oh, thanks for the food, you're a lifesaver".

"No problem, if you need anything else press the buzzer. Someone will be back to collect your tray". She smiled and then turned and left the room.

As Ryan was finishing with his food he heard a knock on his door "Come in".

Calleigh and Eric walked in and were both happy to see Ryan sitting up eating his lunch. Calleigh thought he looked much better than last night, but he still looked awful. "Hi Ryan, you're looking better today, how are you feeling?"

Ryan looked at the woman and remembered her from last night, but he could not remember her name "I'm feeling ok, but my arm and ribs hurt a bit. I'm sorry, I know that you were here last night, but I can't remember your name". Ryan then looked at the man who was with her "I don't think you were here last night, were you? If you were I am sorry that I forgot your name as well".

Calleigh was grateful that Horatio had warned her Ryan's memory was still the same "Oh, that's ok; you were still a bit out of it last night. I'm Calleigh and this is Eric. We both work with you in the crime lab".

Ryan hated the fact that he could not remember these people. He wondered if anything would seem familiar, but he had to be patient "That's right, your Calleigh, but were you here last night Eric?"

Eric spoke for the first time since entering the room "No, I wasn't here, but I'm glad to see you".

"So do the both of you plan on staying long?" He was getting bored of sitting in this hospital bed. For some reason he had a feeling that he didn't like hospitals.

Calleigh spoke for the both of them "Well, I plan on staying, but Eric does have to get back to work soon".

Eric thought he should add to this "Yes, but I plan on coming back later after work, so don't go anywhere".

Ryan couldn't tell if they were just being nice to him or if they were genuinely concerned for his well being, but if Eric was coming back and was willing to do this after work then he had to wonder if they were friends. "So I was wondering, what can you guys tell me about me? When I asked Mr. Caine he seemed to skirt around my question".

Eric couldn't help but chuckle at Ryan calling Horatio Mr. Caine. "Sure, what do you want to know Ryan?"

This brought a big smile to Ryan's face "Well for starter, what kind of relationship do we have, are we just coworkers or are we friends?"

Eric was really hoping the first question would have been an easier one "Well, I guess you could call us friends". He thought this sounded awful, but he didn't really hang out with Ryan much anymore and he never really thought much about their friendship anymore; if it was ever really a friendship at all.

Ryan was suddenly confused "What do you mean you guess you could call us friends, what kind of guy am I, a big jerk or something". Ryan was starting to get angry because it didn't seem like any of his friends had come to visit him yet, only his coworkers.

Calleigh did not like where this conversation was going so she stepped in "No Ryan, you are not a big jerk, you have lots of friends, I think what Eric was trying to say was that you work so much together there just isn't a whole lot of time outside of work to just hang out".

Ryan could buy that, but he had to wonder about Calleigh, "So are we at least friends".

"Yes we are Ryan". Calleigh knew she had her ups and downs with Ryan and had to wonder about their friendship at times, but she was confident in her answer.

"Well, that's a relief. I was beginning to wonder. So what else can you tell me about myself?" Ryan had such a big smile on his face that it made him appear almost childlike.

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Author's note: Hope you're enjoying it. Chapter 4 should be out soon.


	4. Chapter 4

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After Ryan asked for more information, Eric thought this was a good time for him to make his exit "Well, I don't mean to make this visit short, but I really should get back to work. I'll come back and visit you later after work, ok".

Ryan looked over at Eric when he heard him say something about leaving "Ok, I'm sure I'll still be here".

Calleigh thought Eric had wonderful timing; it was not like Eric to make his escape when things got difficult, but considering the topic of conversation, it was probably more than he could handle. "I'll walk out with you Eric". She turned to Ryan "I'll be back in a few minutes".

Calleigh and Eric walked out of Ryan's room and closed the door behind them. As soon as they were in the hallway Calleigh turned to Eric "Wow, he is so different. I didn't know what to expect, but he is like a totally different person. I also didn't expect him to ask such personal questions right away, but then again if he doesn't ask them he may never remember who he really is".

Eric had a look of agreement on his face "Yeah, but I felt really uncomfortable in there. It's weird that he can remember some stuff but any personal information about him or us is gone". Eric paused and looked at his watch, "I'll come back after work, but I just hope he gets his questions out of the way. I don't really know much about his life so I won't be much help".

Calleigh had a feeling that Eric had been uncomfortable when Ryan was asking questions, so she was not going to try and push him to stay "Ok Eric, I should be at work sometime soon, but I just wanted to sit with him for a little while longer".

Calleigh watched Eric leave before going back into Ryan's room. When she entered she found Ryan still sitting up and looking eager to talk some more.

Ryan looked up as he heard the door open. He was happy to see it was Calleigh who had returned and he couldn't help but smile "Hi Calleigh, thanks for coming back to sit with me. It's lonely sitting here in this room. I am not sure what to do since I can't even remember what I like to do". His smile faded as soon as he finished his sentence.

Calleigh noticed his face change from a smile to someone who looked very sad "I wouldn't want you to be alone. But are you sure you're up to this right now? You look like you should be resting". Calleigh was not trying to get out of answering his questions, but she really thought he was starting to look really tired.

"I am kind of tired now that you mention it". As Ryan lay back on his pillows his injuries made him remember that he was still pretty sore from the accident. "Maybe I'll just take a little nap and then we can talk some more if you're still here. Can I ask one thing before I end up falling asleep though?"

Calleigh thought she was going to be able to get away from anymore questions for the time, but no such luck "Sure Ryan, what's your question".

Ryan eyes were starting to get heavier and he couldn't help but yawn as he said "It's about my family, what can you tell me about my parents and are they going to be visiting me soon?"

Calleigh didn't know much about his family life but she didn't want to not answer him "Well, I don't know when anyone will be coming for a visit, but I can tell you that your father and step mother live on the west coast".

Ryan was dead tired, but he was still able to comprehend what he was being told "You said my father and stepmother, what about my mother?"

"I think you should rest for now and I can tell you all about her later". This conversation was very awkward for Calleigh. She didn't want to be the one to tell him his mother was dead, plus she thought it might be too much for him to hear right now.

"Ok" was all Ryan could think to say. He wanted to know more about his mother, but he agreed it would be better to find out after he rested for awhile. It felt like his pain killers were wearing off, but drugs were the last thing he wanted to be taking so he was hoping a little sleep would make him feel better.

Calleigh saw that Ryan was really struggling to stay awake now so she decided it was time to leave "I'm going to let you get some sleep. I know that Eric is coming back here after work, but I will try and visit you again later".

"Ok, I'll see you later" this was all Ryan could get out before he fell asleep.

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As soon as Calleigh got to work she went and looked for Eric. She found him in the DNA lab reviewing some lab results "Hi Eric".

Eric looked up and smiled at Calleigh "Hi, I thought you would be at the hospital longer than this?"

Calleigh smiled back at Eric, "I didn't really get to talk to him much after you left. He was starting to fall asleep, so I thought it was best to let him get his rest. But I was able to talk to his doctor about how different he was acting before I left and he said it is actually kind common for a person's personality to change when they have had a head trauma and some form of memory loss. He said that all we can really do is just be there for him and try to get him around as many familiar things as possible. But he warned me that his personality could change several times again before he remembers who he used to be".

Eric was happy to hear that Ryan's behavior was normal, but he was still worried "Well, than we will just have to do what the doctor's orders and help him all we can".

-

-

Ryan cried out in pain. Just moments ago he was sleeping soundly, but something woke him and caused him to sit up to quickly. As he sat there he was having trouble catching his breath. His chest also hurt a lot, so he placed his hand on his chest in an attempt to rub the pain away.

There had been a nurse walking past Ryan's room when she heard the cry. She came running into Ryan's room and saw him struggling to breath and holding his chest in pain. She grabbed the oxygen mask and placed it on Ryan's face before pressing the call button for assistance. She looked at Ryan and saw that he was still struggling to breathe "I need you to try and inhale through your mouth and exhale through your nose; nice and easy". She could tell Ryan was trying to do what she was telling him and it seems to be working. As she was watching him a few other people including his doctor had joined her.

Dr. Lakken had already gone over to Ryan and was examining him. He looked at the nurse "so, can you tell me what happened".

"I was just walking down the hallway when I heard him scream. I came in and saw that he was holding his chest and was struggling to breathe. I gave him some oxygen which seems to be helping him". She looked over at Ryan and gave him a reassuring smile.

The doctor looked back at Ryan "Are you feeling better now?"

Ryan's chest still hurt, but not as bad now that he was able to breathe. All he could do was nod at the doctor's question.

"Ok, well I would like to get some x-rays of your chest to make sure there is nothing we missed. I want you to take it easy for the rest of the day Mr. Wolfe. I know you had some visitors earlier today and you got yourself all excited so let's try and not do that again until you're feeling better". The doctor felt like he was scolding him, but he knew how lucky Ryan was to come out of the bus accident alive.

The doctor turned to the nurse and gave her some instructions. He then turned back to Ryan and gave his leg a pat "I'll be back to check on you later".

Ryan watched the doctor leave and decided to sink back into this pillow on the best. He felt like he was feeling better so he decided to take the mask off his face.

The nurse who was with him saw him remove his mask "I think you should leave that one for a little while longer".

Ryan started to say something, but when he realized nothing was coming out he cleared his throat which seems to help a little "I'm feeling much better". He would have said more but he starting coughing and found the nurse putting the mask back on his face. He tried to wave her off, but he was feeling very weak and she won the battle.

"Now I said you should leave this on for a little while longer and I meant it". She was trying to be strict, but she could not help but give him a smile as she said it.

Ryan just nodded his head and closed his eyes. The oxygen did make him feel better. Before he knew it he was sleeping again.

Seeing that he had fallen asleep the nurse replaced the mask with the tubing that provides oxygen just through the nose. She thought it would make him feel more comfortable. After she checked a few things she went out to the nurse's station and made sure that tests the doctor had wanted performed were ordered.

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By the time Eric was done with his shift it was about 7 at night. He knew that visiting hours were over at 9 so that gave him about 2 hours to see Ryan. He had promised he would stop by and he didn't want to disappoint him. He knew that other people had already gone to see Ryan, but they said he was resting most of the day and had been unable to talk with him. Eric thought it was probably better they hadn't; Ryan really did need his rest.

When Eric arrived at the hospital and was on his way to Ryan's room he was stopped by one of the nurse's "Hi, you're one of Ryan Wolfe's friends, aren't you?"

"Yes, I wanted to come back and see him before visiting hours were over. This isn't a problem is it?" Eric didn't know exactly why she was asking but he hoped there was nothing wrong.

"No it shouldn't be a problem, but we need you to keep your visit brief and try not to overexcite him. He had a rough time this afternoon. We don't know exactly what caused it, but earlier he woke up and was struggling to breathe. We ran some tests and luckily it was nothing, but we think he may have had a panic attack. This can sometimes happen to someone who has suffered some form of memory loss and is struggling to comprehend everything that is going on around them".

"Thanks, I'll sit with him for a while and keep the conversation simple". Eric could tell the nurse was ok with this response. He watched her walk back to the nurses' station before walking into Ryan's room.

When Eric looked at Ryan he noticed that he didn't look as good as he had before. He had to wonder what exactly happened earlier to make his appearance change so much. "Hi Ryan, I heard you had a little bit of excitement earlier; you had that nurse of yours all worried".

He stared at Eric for a few moments before continuing "Hey, thanks for coming back". He really didn't want to talk much, but it was nice to know that he had friends who wanted to see him.

Eric stood there feeling kind of awkward. He didn't really know what he should say. Ryan was being very quiet, which was very different from how he was acting earlier today. Eric sat down on one of the chairs and looked up at the TV that was on "So, anything good on TV tonight".

Ryan glanced up at the TV; he had almost forgotten it was on "Um, I don't know. To be honest with you I really haven't been watching it". He wanted to ask Eric if he liked watching TV and if so what did he watch, but he was not in the mood to ask any questions right now. Plus he didn't know if Eric would be able to answer his questions or not. He had a few other people stop in and see him, but it seemed like no one knew that much about him. He was feeling a little depressed about it all and just needed time to think.

Eric wondered what to say next, but the only thing that came out was "There is a game on tonight and I think we can catch the second half, do you want to watch it with me?"

"Sure, sounds good". Ryan handed the TV remote to Eric and watched as he changed the channel. He sat there staring at the TV for awhile but soon he found himself just staring at the TV not sure of what he was watching. He didn't try and fight the sleep that was started to overwhelm him. He closed his eyes and fell asleep.

After watching about 20 minutes of the game, Eric noticed that Ryan had fallen asleep so he decided it was time to go. He turned off the TV and left the room. He decided he would come back tomorrow for another visit. He was sure that Ryan just needed more rest. He hoped tomorrow would be a better day for Ryan.

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**Author's note**: I think I was rushing things along to quickly so I thought I would slow things down a bit. Thanks for making me realize that Fergie. I hope everyone is still enjoying this story.


	5. Chapter 5

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It had been 3 days since Ryan's accident and 3 days since Horatio had placed his first call to Ryan's dad; there had been a total of 4 messages left. By the time he received a call back he was no mood to be very friendly with the man.

When Horatio had looked at the caller ID on his phone he didn't recognize the caller "This is Horatio".

"Yes, this is Brian Wolfe, Ryan's father. I just arrived back in the country and saw that you had left me a couple of messages. Is Ryan alright? Your messages sounded kind of urgent.

Horatio was glad to finally be talking to Ryan's dad, he heard the concern in this voice, but he had to wonder why it took so long to call and find out about Ryan, "Yes, I wanted to inform you that Ryan was involved in a bus accident and was taken to the Dade Memorial hospital. He suffered a minor concussion, broken arm, broken ribs and partial memory loss. He was in stable condition when they first brought him in, and he has continued to improve".

There was pause on the phone before Brian said anything. "I would have called sooner, but I didn't get any phone reception where I was. I'm glad that he is ok but did you say he had a partial memory loss".

"Yes, he doesn't seem to remember any personal things about his life".

Horatio waited for Brian to say something but when too much silent time had passed he spoke again "I think you should come out here and see him. He is going to need his family to help him through this and to help him remember his life".

"Yes, I do want to come out there, but I won't be able to come out for a couple of days". He knew this made him sound like a father who didn't care, but that was the farthest thing from the truth. He just didn't know if he wanted to see Ryan in this condition.

Horatio couldn't understand why Ryan's father was not jumping on the next plane to come and see his son. If he was the father in the situation he would not have wasted anytime in getting here "He was wondering when you were coming, when should I tell him to expect you"

"Look Mr. Caine, I know I would never make father of the year, but I really do care about Ryan. I just have a few things to take care of before I can come out". Brian knew this didn't sound good and maybe he should just tell him the truth about why he wasn't coming right away.

Horatio was getting angry "Ryan really needs to see you. Isn't Ryan more important that whatever you have to take care of?"

Brian knew he deserved this since he wasn't being truthful with the man, but he could help being a little defensive in his response "Look, my business is none of your business. I will come out and see my son when I can". He had to calm down. He didn't know why he was starting to yell. He loved Ryan so he decided that Mr. Caine deserved a more honest answer. "Look, I'm sorry I yelled. I don't know how much Ryan has ever told you about his childhood, but I do have my reasons for not coming out right away. I just don't know if I can see him lying in the hospital again totally unaware of who he is".

Horatio was not expecting Ryan's father to say this. He didn't know anything about Ryan's childhood so he didn't know what he was talking about "What are you saying, this has happened before?"

"Yes, when Ryan was 8 years old he was involved in an auto accident that claimed the lives of his mother and brother; my wife and son. When I got to the hospital I was told that Ryan had survived but he didn't remember anything. He was in the hospital for 3 weeks before he was well enough to come home. I worked so hard with him to try and get him to remember anything but he never did. He was such a different person after the accident that I often felt like I had lost both my sons on that fateful day. He was never the same little boy I knew and it took awhile to get to know the new person he eventually became. So I hope you understand my reluctance to come out and see him. I just don't know if I want to relive all of that again". Brian had not had to think about this for a very long time. He was starting to have a hard time with this conversation.

Horatio was completely blown away by this news, but he still couldn't believe that Ryan's own father didn't want to see him. "I never knew any of this. He never talked about his life much. But I still think it is important that you come as soon as you can".

Brian seemed relieved that Ryan's boss had not been more insistent on him coming out right away "Yes, I promise to come as soon as I can. Please keep me informed if his condition changes though. I will give you a call as to when I can get there, but I know he is in good hands. He has always had the highest praise for all of you". Brian said a quick goodbye and hung the phone.

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When Horatio arrived at the hospital he went straight to Ryan's room. When he walked inside he found that he was sitting up in the chair next to his bed just staring out the window. He didn't want to scare him so he knocked lightly on the wall to get his attention.

Ryan was drawn out of his daydream by a faint noise. He looked behind him to find he had company "Hello Mr. Caine, I hope you were not waiting long. I didn't hear you walk in".

Horatio didn't like how Ryan addressed him "You can call me Horatio or just H if you like. This is what you typically called me before".

Ryan suddenly looked embarrassed by this "Sorry, I didn't know. There are a lot of things I don't know so please forgive my ignorance". For some reason Ryan had fallen into a small hole of depression and he was trying everything he could to prevent himself from sinking further.

Horatio decided to change the subject, he could see this had bothered Ryan "How are you feeling today, you're looking much better". He had taken note of his appearance as soon as he walked in. It was good to see him out of bed.

Ryan was getting so use to this question "I am finally starting to feel better. They thought it was time I got out of bed. I even took a walk around the floor".

Horatio smiled "That's good to hear. Before you know it you will be back at work. I talked to your father today and he said he would be coming out in a few days to see you".

Ryan gave a Horatio a weak smile at hearing this "That's great, I look forward to meeting him. What about my mother, is she coming too?"

"Your step mother will be coming with your father". Horatio didn't have the heart to tell him about his mother.

Ryan just shook his head up and down in response. Once again someone had mentioned his step mother, but said nothing about his mother. He just hoped she would be coming to visit him soon as well. He couldn't remember his mother, but he had a strong feeling they were close.

Horatio couldn't help the lost and sad look on Ryan's face. He wondered if he was remembering something about his mother.

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Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed chapter 5. Thanks to everyone who has left me a review for my story so far.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_NOTE: I don't know how much information had been told about Ryan's family on the show, but in this story he only had a brother who had died when he was younger. I know that in one episode there was a mention of Ryan having a niece, which would indicate he does have a sibling, but I didn't want that for my story. I just thought I would make note of this in case anyone was wondering where his sibling was. If there were other things mentioned about his family I am unaware of them. I tried to pay attention to this while watching the show, but I don't know if I missed anything. _

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5 days had passed since Ryan had been in the bus accident and he had been visited by so many people he was starting to feel like he had a lot of friends who really cared about him, but he just wished he could remember them. Not one person who came to visit him reminded him of anything familiar and whenever they talked about the past it meant nothing to him.

The more time that went by in the hospital the more this whole situation bothered Ryan. He had talked to the hospital psychologist several times since regaining awareness of his memory loss and he had been told that he would go through several levels of emotion. The emotion had had been feeling for the last couple of days was depression. He tried to put on a happy face for the strangers who were supposed to be his friends, but it was hard to be happy when he didn't really know how to act around them. He had also stopped asking them personal questions since they either didn't know the answer or what they told him wasn't that impressive.

But today he was going home, wherever that was. The doctor's felt that he didn't need to be in the hospital since his injuries were healing nicely and they also felt that his memory may return sooner (if at all) if he were in a more familiar surroundings. The only thing the doctors wanted to make sure was that he was not to be left alone for the first few days. They were worried he would have another panic attack. It had been decided that Calleigh would stay with him since she was the closest to him at the station. It was only a temporary situation until Ryan's father and step mother arrived.

-

Ryan was putting a few things away in the bag someone had brought from his house when Calleigh showed up.

"Hi Ryan, so are you ready to go home?" Calleigh had walked in pushing a wheel chair, which she parked alongside the wall.

Ryan turned and looked at Calleigh "Hi Calleigh, I guess I'm ready. I'm starting to get very sick of this room so a change of scenery will be welcome". Ryan sat on the bed and continued "Well, I think I have everything packed; now all I need to do have the doctor sign the release papers".

Calleigh went over to stand closer to Ryan "Great, I ran into the doctor on the way here and he said he would be in momentarily".

"That's good, but do I really have to ride in that" Ryan motioned to the wheel chair with his one good arm.

Calleigh frowned at Ryan "Yes Ryan, its hospital policy".

As Calleigh inspected the room to make sure everything was packed up, the doctor came in and told Ryan to take it easy for awhile and to come in if he experiences any pain. He gave Ryan some prescriptions and a few reminders for follow up visits before signing him out.

As soon as the doctor left a nurse came in to assist Ryan into his wheel chair "Well, we are sure going to miss you around here, but you will probably be more comfortable in your own home". She undid the breaks on the wheel chair and pushed it out of the room with Calleigh following.

Once they reached the front entrance of the hospital Ryan saw that Eric was waiting in a car to drive them home. Ryan carefully stood up and got into the back seat of the car and let Calleigh buckle him in since it was too difficult for him to manage it with one hand.

As he watched Calleigh shut the door he heard Eric say "Hi Ryan, today's the big day. Are you ready to get out of this place?"

"I guess so" was all Ryan could think to say before Calleigh joined them in the car.

The drive home was long and silent. Ryan was so focused on the things that passed by the window that neither Calleigh nor Eric wanted to say anything. They figured he was just trying to get his bearing of where he lived, which was an important part of his healing process. Another reason both had chose to stay quiet was because they had seen Ryan go from a very talkative inquisitive person the first day he woke up to a very scared quiet and often depressed person. They were told this was normal and that everyday would get easier, but it was still strange.

Eric broke the silence when they pulled up to Ryan's condo "Well here were are, does any of this look familiar to you?"

Ryan was silent for a moment as he took a good look around "No, It doesn't". There was a strong hint of disappointment in his voice.

Ryan opened his door and was startled by Calleigh waiting to help him out. "I can manage by myself".

Calleigh didn't like this response "I don't care; while I am here you are going to do what I say so get use to it". She gave him one of her famous smiles and carefully helped in up and out of the car. She looked around and saw that Eric already had Ryan's bag and was headed up to open the door.

As Ryan walked with Calleigh to the front door he was taking in every little detail trying very hard to find something that was familiar, but he couldn't. As he came to the front door he hesitated.

Calleigh noticed he had stopped "What's wrong Ryan, your home".

Ryan didn't respond but just stood there looking inside.

"Ryan, are you remembering something?" Eric saw the look on his face, but didn't know what it meant.

Ryan still didn't respond and walked inside the condo; his condo. He stopped just inside the door and stood there looking around "So this is where I live, why I can't remember any of it. This is just so frustrating". The despair was evident.

Eric was about to say something but Calleigh motioned for him to just be quiet while Ryan explored. They walked with Ryan as he went from room to room.

Ryan stopped when he had gone through every room. He had stopped in the same room where he had started. "It looks like a nice place, but it's hard to believe I live here. It is always this clean though?"

Eric and Calleigh shared a smile after hearing him say this. Even though neither of them had ever been here, they knew how Ryan liked everything to be clean. Calleigh walked over to where Ryan was standing and gave his good arm a reassuring squeeze "Yes, this is where you live. It's a very nice place isn't it? As for the cleanliness, I don't know if anyone told you yet, but you like to have everything neat and tidy".

Ryan looked at Calleigh and had to wonder something "So have you guys been her often?"

Eric walked over and stood with Calleigh, "No, this is the first time we've seen your place. We just never got the chance to visit because of work".

Calleigh had to agree with Eric's statement but also knew that part of the reason was that they had never taken the time to really get to know Ryan. Had they taken the time this would not be the first time they had seen where he lived. "So Ryan, I see that you have 2 bedrooms so I guess I will just take the one that looks like the guest room". As they had walked through the condo she had noticed the 2 rooms, but since both of them were so clean and neat she really didn't know which one was his. But she figured the one with the clothes in the closet would belong to Ryan; she just needed to look in the closets.

"Ok, that sounds good". Ryan already sounded too preoccupied with his surroundings to worry about where she was staying. He took his bag from Eric and walked toward the bedrooms. He went in the one that seems to have a more lived in feeling; he just hoped it was the right room. He turned around and found Calleigh had joined him. "So, I am assuming this is my room then?"

"It certainly looks like the main bedroom". She went over to the closet and opened the door. She was happy to see it was full of clothes indicating this was definitely Ryan's room. "Well there are clothes in the closet so I am going to say you chose correctly. Maybe you subconsciously knew which room was yours; which is a good sign".

"I hope your right, but honestly nothing in here looks familiar. I only chose it because it had a more lived in feeling". He put his bag on the bed and sat down next to it. As soon as he sat down he realized how tired he felt. He pushed the bag off the bed and lay down on the pillows. They were a big improvement over the hospital pillows. "I think I am just going to take a little nap. I hope you don't mind?"

Calleigh came over to him and started taking his shoes off "Of course I don't mind. This is one of the reasons that I plan on staying here with you. I just want to make sure you are comfortable and keep feeling better". After she finished with his shoes she took the blanket that was neatly folded at the end of the bed and placed it over Ryan. She saw that his eyes were already closed so she decided to quietly make her way out of the room.

-

Calleigh found Eric sitting on the couch in Ryan's living room and took a seat next to him "Ryan's taking a nap. He looked like he could use a little rest".

Eric put his arm around Calleigh "He certainly has a lot ahead of him. I can imagine part of what he must be going through, but at least my memory loss was not associated with people. I don't know what I would have done if I couldn't have remembered anyone". Eric was thinking about the time after he had been shot and had to rely on notes to assist him in his job. He struggled with the steps of how to process a crime scene but he was able to overcome it and get back to normal.

"I know we are going to do everything we can to make it easy on him, but I just wished I knew more about his life. I have to admit I will be happy when his father gets here. That way his questions about his family can get answered". She sat snuggled up to Eric for a few more minutes before she got up and decided it was time for Eric to leave "Well, I have a lot to do around here so I think it's time for you to get back to work". She would have loved for him to stay but she really wanted to make sure she was there for Ryan in case he woke up and needed her.

Eric stood up "Yeah, I should probably get going, I told Horatio that I would be in around noon. I know that you don't have your car so if you need anything call me, ok".

"Ok, but I figured I would be able to use Ryan's car now that it is back from the shop". She had made sure his car repairs were paid for and it was back in his parking space.

After Eric left Calleigh busied herself with checking out Ryan's condo so that she knew where everything was in case Ryan asked. She also took note of what was in his kitchen and made a list of items to pick up at the store. She only planned on staying until his father showed up, but they would need food as well.

As she was looking at the items in his curio cabinet she saw a photo album on the bottom shelf. She picked it up and took it over to the couch. She opened it up and saw that it was filled with family pictures. There were several pictures of Ryan when he was younger and several pictures of a man who Calleigh could only assume was his father since he looked like an older version of Ryan. After she was done she placed it on the coffee table so that Ryan could look at it later. She hoped it would help him remember something about his life.

Calleigh looked at the clock and saw this it read 2 in the afternoon. She decided to go and check on Ryan to see if he was still sleeping. She walked over to his door and opened it very slowly as to not make any noise. Once the door was opened she looked inside the room and was surprised to see the bed was empty. Fear kicked in as she entered the bedroom to search for him. She didn't have to worry for very long as she found that he was sitting out on his balcony that was off the bedroom. Her first thoughts were to rush out there and tell him that he scared her, but she thought this might freak him out. She decided to let him sit out there since it looked like his thoughts were miles away.

-

Ryan thought he heard Calleigh enter his bedroom, but he was grateful that she did not join him. He had only slept for a short time and then decided to get up and sit outside. His room was so unfamiliar that it was hard to sit in there. He really just wanted some time alone to think about his life, or what life he could remember. He had tried to think about everything while he was in the hospital, but he rarely had a moment alone.

At first he thought it was great to have so many people around, that way he could get answers to some of his questions and fill in the missing blanks. But as he heard the answers he came to realize they didn't know any more about his than he did. This was where his depression had started.

He knew his father was coming soon and he hoped that he would finally start to get more answers about his life. But in the meantime he was glad that Calleigh was staying with him. Out of all the people he had met in the hospital he felt the most comfortable with her. He had to wonder how he really felt about her before.

As he sat there thinking he felt his stomach growl and wondered what time it was. It had been a while since he had last eaten anything so he thought it was a good time to go and see what was in the kitchen. He got up and walked back through his bedroom and made his way to the kitchen. He was glad his condo was small, or he may have gotten lost on his way to the kitchen.

As he entered the kitchen he saw that Calleigh was sitting at the table drinking something and reading a magazine. "Hi Calleigh".

Calleigh looked up from her reading "Hi Ryan, did you sleep well?"

"Well enough, but I think it will take awhile before I feel comfortable in my own place". He walked farther into the kitchen and looked around to see if there was any food sitting out. When he didn't see any he didn't know what to do. Even though he was told that this was his place and everything in the kitchen was his, he didn't feel like he was able to just start going through the cupboards or the refrigerator to see what there was to eat.

Calleigh could see his dilemma "Are you hungry, I could make you a sandwich?" She really didn't have much else to offer him since there really wasn't much food in the kitchen.

"Sounds good Calleigh, thank you". He took a seat at the kitchen table while Calleigh got up and started making his sandwich.

Calleigh finished making Ryan's sandwich and brought it over to him along with a glass of milk. "I am going to assume you like roast beef since it was in your refrigerator, but we are going to need to go to the grocery store to stock up".

Ryan picked up the sandwich and took a bite. As he chewed it he thought it tasted alright, but he would have to remember to not buy any when he went to the store later.

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Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed chapter 6. I could have kept on going with this chapter, but I thought sleep was more important. Chapter 7 will be up soon.


	7. Chapter 7

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Ryan was enjoying Calleigh's company, but he knew it would come to an end soon. His father was due to arrive later in the day and he was feeling very nervous. He had talked briefly on the phone with his father, but this was the only interaction he had with the man so far.

Calleigh had been unable to tell him much about his father since she had never met him. She had also been truthful to him and said he never talked about his father much, but the few times he had mentioned the man she had the feeling they didn't get along. He really appreciated Calleigh's honesty, but part of the truth was that she didn't really know that much about him in general. He came to realize this with other people he worked with. Everyone he talked to was unable to provide him with specific details about his life. The last few days he had to wonder what kind of person he really was. He didn't feel like the kind of person people described, but for some reason he had chosen to remain closed off to most people. He had a few theories about this; maybe he didn't trust the people he worked with or maybe there was nothing to tell. He also had thought that maybe he was not proud of who he was or that he felt he was better than everyone else and didn't feel like they were worthy. He had a feeling that none of this was true and that he was just a shy person who had not gotten to know anyone yet.

Not knowing anything about himself was really starting to bother him. He was hoping to have some memories return, but there was nothing. Calleigh had tried her best to make him feel better, but it wasn't working.

He was told by the doctors that it might take time but he was getting impatient. Worst case scenario was that he would never regain his memories and that he would have to start all over again. He wondered if he would still be allowed to work at the crime lab or would he have to find a new job. He had discussed this possibility with Calleigh and she suggested he tag along on some of her cases to see if this would jog his memory. He had liked this idea since he was sure he remembered how to do his job, he just couldn't remember the people from his job.

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Calleigh walked into the living room to find Ryan sitting on the couch looking at the picture album for the 5th time. She had hoped it would have helped, but she was beginning to wonder if it was actually hurting him. She remembered the first time he looked at it he studied the photos and tried to make sense of the people who were in them. By the fourth time he had only looked at it for a few minutes before throwing it to the floor where it sat until now. "Hey Ryan, I see you're looking at the photos again. You just need to give yourself some time and I'm sure that things will start to look better".

"I just keep looking at these photos and hope something will trigger inside my head. There has got to be something familiar in the pictures that I can remember. I look at the pictures that I'm in and it's like looking at someone else". Ryan never took his eyes off the album while talking to Calleigh.

Calleigh came over and sat down next to Ryan "I think it's time to do something else" she reached over and gently removed the album from Ryan's hands. She was grateful that he didn't resist. "Hey, maybe we should clean up this place before your father get's here".

Ryan looked around the room before responding "Why, it looks clean enough".

Calleigh had not anticipated this change in Ryan. Ever since he had gotten home he had no interest in cleaning up after himself. She thought it was his injuries that had prevented him from the task at first, but after she suggested it a few times and was shot down she had to wonder. "You use to like to clean; I just thought you would want to tidy up the place".

Ryan turned and smiled at Calleigh in the eye's "I know you and others have told me this, but I just can't believe that I would have spent so much time cleaning. I look around and think it looks just fine so it's hard for me to believe I was like this. "Let's get out of here and have some fun. I know you're going back to your place tonight so let's live it up while we can".

Calleigh was not expecting this but thought it would be fun. If there was one thing she learned in the last few days it was that she enjoyed Ryan's company. She had always enjoyed it before the accident, but he was so different now and just so easy to talk to. "Ok, that sounds good. What do you want to do?"

"I thought we could have a picnic in the park. The weather is just perfect for a little food and some fun in the sun". Ryan stood up and using his good arm helped Calleigh up. "Come on, it'll be fun".

Calleigh liked the idea. She went into the kitchen and helped Ryan make some food and get everything ready. This seemed like a nice way to end her stay here. She was actually going to miss helping Ryan out.

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As Ryan and Calleigh were walking back to his condo after their afternoon picnic, they saw an unfamiliar car sitting out front. As they got closer they saw that there were 2 people sitting in the car. "Well, it looks like I have some company, but I don't recognize the car, do you?"

"No, but it looks like a rental car". Calleigh had noted the license plates and the decal in the back window of the car.

By the time they had reached the driver side door it swung open and an older gentleman got out. From where Calleigh was standing she thought the man looked like an older version of Ryan.

Ryan's father had been waiting in the car for the past 15 minutes and when he saw Ryan walking up toward the car he got out to greet him. As soon as he stood up he saw the lack of recognition in Ryan's eyes. "Ryan, there you are, I didn't know when you were getting back so I thought I would wait out front of your place until you got back".

Ryan looked at the man "Hi, do I know you?"

There was an obvious look of hurt in Ryan's father's eyes "Ryan, I'm your father". He went over and gave him a big hug.

Ryan reluctantly hugged the man back before letting go. He was embarrassed and didn't know how to hide the look on his face. As he looked at the man he finally did see a resemblance to the person who was on his photo album, but this man was much older than the person in the pictures. "Father, I'm sorry I didn't recognize you. I thought we were supposed to pick you up from the airport". Ryan looked over at Calleigh for confirmation.

"I'm sorry Ryan, we were able to get an earlier flight and once we got here I thought it would be easier to just rent a car".

As Ryan heard the explanation he looked into the car and saw a woman looking back at him. Ryan's father noticed this and went over to the other side of the car to offer assistance to the woman as she got out. They both walked back over to Ryan and Calleigh "Ryan, this is your step mother Elana".

"Nice to meet you Elana". Ryan shook her hand and then remembered Calleigh was still there "Oh, I'm sorry, this is Calleigh Duquesne, she has been the one staying with me".

Ryan's father stepped over to Calleigh and offered his hand "Hello, I'm Brian Wolfe".

Calleigh took his hand before replying "Hello, it's nice to put a face to your voice Mr. Wolfe". She had talked to him a few times on the phone while she was staying with Ryan. She had looked in Elana's direction and took her offered hand as well.

There were a few moments of awkward silence before Calleigh suggested they go inside. Ryan led the way as his father and step mother fell in stride behind him. Calleigh took up the rear and closed the door behind them.

As soon as everyone was inside Calleigh took the picnic left over's from Ryan and looked at his family "Are you thirsty, would you like something from the kitchen?"

Elana looked in Calleigh's direction "Yes, I would love something to drink; this heat is starting to get to me".

Brian had also said he would love a glass of water so Calleigh left the family alone in the room to get to know one another while she got the drinks. She hoped Ryan would be ok out there.

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Ryan didn't really know what to do once everyone had come inside. He had been looking forward to meeting his family, but now that they were here he didn't' know what to say to them. He had rehearsed what he was going to ask, but that was all but forgotten. "Well, I supposed we should sit and wait for Calleigh". Ryan motioned his parents to the couch as he took the recliner.

As soon as Brian Wolfe took his seat he looked his son over. He thought he looked better than what he had originally been told, but then again the accident had occurred a while ago and Ryan has had time to recover. He could however tell that Ryan's injuries were still bothering him since he sat in his chair very carefully and then there was his arm in a cast and the faded bruises on his face and head. But all in all he looked good. He had not seen his son in awhile and was grateful he was given another chance to see him.

Brian finally broke the silence that was hovering in the room "So Ryan, you're looking good, are you feeling better?"

"I'm good; Calleigh's done a good job taking care of me". Even though he was talking to his father, there was nothing familiar about him. He didn't even feel like he could call him father. He really wished Calleigh would stay while they were here.

"I'm glad to hear that". As Brian said that he saw the photo album sitting out "Oh, I see you have been looking at some pictures, may I see which ones they are?"

"Sure", Ryan picked up the album and passed it to his father. He looked in the direction of the kitchen and was wondering what was keeping Calleigh. He could really use her right about now.

Brian opened the album and shared them with Elana "Oh, I remember some of these pictures. You were such a cute little boy, wasn't he" he was addressing his wife when he asked this.

"Oh, I quite agree, who is the other little boy in the photo?" As Elana asked this her eyes grew very large as she realized what she was asking. Why did she ask this, she knew who this was, it was Brian's other son who had died.

Brian stiffened at the question. He knew he would have to explain Ryan's brother and mother to him eventually but he didn't think now was the right time. "I think we could probably look at the pictures another time". He closed the album and set it down on the table hoping this ended the inquiry.

Ryan had been wondering the same thing as Elana so he didn't like that his father didn't answer the question. "Yeah, I was wondering who he was also. He kind of looks like me, but older. I thought he might be a cousin or something". He looked at his father waiting for his response.

Brian really wanted to change the subject but seeing his son waiting there for an answer was too much. "That's your brother Jason?"

"I have a brother, how come no one told me". Ryan wanted to say more but was interrupted by the sound of Calleigh. She walked into the room carrying a tray with 4 glasses of water and lemonade.

Calleigh had seen the whole thing and knew that Ryan's father was looking uncomfortable. She knew that Ryan's older brother was dead, but could tell that his father didn't want to talk about it just yet. She thought her intrusion would be welcomed and give Ryan's father a chance to change the subject.

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Author's note: More to come soon. I know this story is moving slowly, but it should pick up soon.

Let me know if you are still enjoying it. Thanks to all that have left me with a review for the past chapters.


	8. Chapter 8

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As soon as Ryan learned he had a brother he wanted to know more about him. He wondered why no one had told him about Jason, but he didn't have time to be mad about it. He just wanted to know more.

As soon as Calleigh had come in and passed out the drinks he was ready to start asking more questions,  
"So, tell me about Jason, does he live close by? Can I call him and talk to him; maybe he can come out and visit too". Ryan had to slow down and catch his breath. He was very excited to hear about another family member, but he had to wonder why his father and stepmother looked so distraught.

Brian Wolfe had to concede defeat. He really wanted to talk about this after he had spent a little time with his son, "Jason won't be able to come and visit you. That picture you have was the last one taken of the both of you. He died shortly after it was taken".

Ryan looked down at the glass of lemonade in his hand. He didn't know what to say to this. He had a brother who died when he was younger and he couldn't even remember him. "How did he die?" was all Ryan could think to ask.

Brian was holding back tears in his eyes, "It was a car crash. I might as well tell you the rest because it will have to come out sooner or later. Your mother also died in that crash".

Ryan suddenly felt the need to leave the room. Even though his mother and brother died a long time ago, it was like he was hearing it for the first time and he didn't know how to handle the news. "If you'll excuse me, I think I need some air". Ryan put his glass down and swiftly walked toward the front door. He paused at the door for a second before opening it and went outside.

As soon as he was outside he sat down on the steps. He felt like crying, but for some reason he couldn't. He thought it might be because he couldn't cry for someone he did not remember. There was so much he couldn't remember and he had to wonder what other surprised awaited him.

While he was sitting there gathering his courage to return inside he was joined by Calleigh who came out to sit next to him. "Hey Ryan, are you alright?"

Ryan looked at Calleigh for moment before saying "Yes, I'll be fine. It just took me by surprise that's all. Did you know about this?"

Calleigh tried to not look guilty "I did, but I didn't think it was something that should come from me. I knew they were gone, but that was about all I knew so I would not have been able to answer your questions. You never talked about them, but you did let it slip once".

Ryan turned his head and looked away from Calleigh. This reunion with his father was not going the way he had thought it would. He had hoped that as soon as he saw his father everything about his childhood would come back. He didn't know why he thought this, but it was just a kid's dream he guessed. His father and mother were supposed to take him in their arms and hold him telling him that everything was going to be alright. Only it wasn't. There would be no hug from his mother and if he was hoping for a hug from his father he figured he would have gotten one by now. "Calleigh, why is this so hard. So I don't remember anything so what. Why should this feel so awful? So I pick myself up and start all over again, that's not so bad is it". Ryan didn't really know why he was saying this. He had thought about this many times since waking up in the hospital. He had to accept that he may never remember anything again and had to face the facts if he was going to move ahead. He could feel tears starting to well up in his eyes. He had kept these tears at bay for the last few days, but for some reason he didn't think he was going to win today. He turned away from Calleigh and brought his sleeve up to his face to try and stop the inevitable.

Calleigh could tell something was wrong. She had quietly listened to him without interrupting him, but truth be told she just didn't know what to say. But now she could tell this was all finally getting to him and she wanted to do something for him. "Oh Ryan, tell me what I can do for you to make this all better".

Ryan had heard her, but chose not to speak; instead he turned to her and looked into her eyes. Tears were starting to fall onto his cheek.

This was too much for Calleigh to bear, she leaned forward and took him in her arms and let him cry on her shoulder. She had never seen Ryan lose it before and wasn't sure how to react, but he seemed to welcome the embrace.

As Ryan and Calleigh sat down, Brian was watching the show from the inside of the front door. He wished it had been him hugging his son, but Ryan needed someone who he could trust at this moment. As far as Ryan was concerned he was just a stranger and they had only just met a few hours ago. As he stood there his own tears started to fall as he remember the day he learned his wife and eldest son had died. He also remembered being told that Ryan had survived. This was what kept him going, but as soon as he found out Ryan could not remember anything it had changed. That day he had felt like he had lost Ryan as well. He had tried very hard to be there for Ryan in those days that followed, but it was so hard. The day of the accident he remembered his family and how they had eaten breakfast together and laughed about Ryan spilling his cereal all over himself and how he just sat there and pretended it didn't happen. But that little boy was long gone on his first day home. He brought home a complete stranger who didn't know anyone and acted like a completely different person. His little boy was no longer the happy carefree little guy he would read stories to before bed. His little boy was now a paranoid, scared worried little boy who just wanted everything around him to be just so. It was too much to handle, which is why he hired a nanny to look after Ryan. As the years went by he had gotten used to who Ryan had become and had gotten use to the fact that he was not going to remember anything from before the accident. He loved his son very much and had learned to love the new boy that had come home from the hospital. He tried to give him everything, but it never seemed to make any difference. His little boy was gone, and replaced by someone new.

Brian stepped away from the door and went back to sit with Elana. He told himself that he would once again do anything for his son and that he would be here for him regardless if he remembered anything. If Ryan never remembered anything he would accept it and once again get to know who his son was. He loved him and would do anything for him.

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Author's Note – Sorry this was kinda of short, but I wanted to put in Ryan's fathers point of view. I hope you enjoyed it.

Thanks to those of you who have left me a review and thanks to those of you who continue to read my story.


	9. Chapter 9

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In the days that followed, Ryan spent much of his time getting to know his father and step mother. They talked about his life growing up, but it seemed like there was something they were keeping from him. For one thing they never really talked about life before his mother and brother was killed. They had brought pictures with them, but they all seemed to be after the car crash. The other thing that Ryan noticed was how easy his father was taking this. It almost seemed like he knew exactly how to act around his son who didn't know who anyone was. They would sit each night talking about various occasions while he was growing up and look at the pictures that went with them, but the way Brian handled it seemed odd.

Ryan had kept the pictures on the kitchen table and was sitting there looking at them. He really wished he remembered the events that he saw captured on the paper, but there was nothing there, not even a spark of recognition. It was starting to bother him and he wondered if he should put them back into the box from which they came from. Maybe he would later, but right now he was busy preparing a special dinner for his parents. This was their last night here and he wanted to make sure it was a memorable one. If his memory never came back he would need to start making new ones with his family.

He had not done much cooking since he had gotten home so he really had no clues as to where anything was kept, but he this would give him a chance to discover the various locations. He was going to keep dinner simple and make spaghetti. He didn't know if he had ever made this before since he did have any of the ingredients he needed, but a quick trip to the store with his step mother had cured that.

His step mother had offered to help with dinner, but he told her since she had done so much cooking while she was here it was his turn. He had fun making the food; he just hoped it tasted good.

As the homemade sauce was simmering on the stove he looked around and thought he should clean up a bit since his condo was starting to look very messy. His father kept trying to get him to clean it up, but he just didn't feel like it. It had a kind of homey feel to it, something that was lacking when he first entered his home after getting out the hospital. He knew that his friends had cleaned up, but did they have to make it so sterile looking; his first day back it had felt like he was back at the hospital. Maybe he could tidy the place just a little for tonight though.

He went into his coat closet where he knew cleaning supplies were and started sweeping the kitchen floor. Once he was done with the floor he looked at the kitchen table and thought that if they were going to eat on it he would have to move the pictures. Maybe it was time to move them, or at least move them off the table.

After thinking about a new location, Ryan decided it was best if they went back into the photo box that they had come in. He could always bring them back out later if he liked. He opened the box and had just grabbed his first pile of pictures when something inside the box caught his eye. Inside the box at the bottom there was a picture peeking out from under the lining. He pulled up the lining and brought the picture out to inspect it.

The picture was old and must have been taken at Christmas time since there was a tree in the back ground and plenty of wrapped and unwrapped pictures. There were also 3 people featured, one of a little boy who was smack dab in the middle of the unwrapped presents, another was an older boy who was sitting on the couch looking mad. The last picture was a woman who was laughing at the site before her. He looked at the back to see if there was any writing to indicate who the people were; there was nothing.

He took a seat at the table forgetting about the task that he was trying to accomplish. The more he stared at the picture the more active the images appeared in this mind. He didn't know how long he had been staring at the picture, but he was soon very excited. He shot up from the table and started running to where his parents were packing their stuff for their trip home tomorrow. As he ran he kept shouting "I remember something. I remember this picture being taken".

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Brian was putting his clothes into his suitcase when he heard Ryan yelling, "What's that all about?" He looked at his wife and went out to see what all the commotion was about. He had just stepped out of the room when he saw his son standing there holding a picture and looking very excited. He had to ask "What's going on Ryan?"

"I remember this photo; I remember who the people are and what the occasion is. I even remember who took it". Ryan turned the picture so his father could see.

Brian knew the photo quite well since he had been the one who had taken it, but he was wondering where his son as found the picture. He thought he had taken care of not bring any photos that had been taken before the accident, but apparently he missed one. He took the photo and looked at it, thinking to himself that it had been years since he had taken it. He looked at his son, "Where did you find this?"

"I found it under the lining in the photo box you brought along". Ryan grabbed the photo back and pointed at the little boy in the middle, "this is me isn't it. I remember that day quiet well. You took this picture of us at Christmas time. This is a picture of Jason, mom and me, am I right?"

"That's exactly right. You're saying that you remember the moment this picture was taken?" Brian was excited over the idea of his son regaining some memories, but these were not the memories he thought he would get back. He had given up on the idea that his son would remember anything from before the accident a long time ago, but why wasn't he happy now?

"Yes dad, I remember standing there and getting all excited and opening up a bunch of presents. I remember Jason being angry since some of the presents belonged to him and I had just opened them. Mom thought it was so funny and couldn't stop laughing, you were also laughing the whole time you took the picture. I can even remember getting a small toy car that I had been wanting for so long". Ryan could not contain his excitement any longer; he grabbed his father and gave him a big hug. He hoped his father would respond to the emotions being inflicted on him and hug him back, but there was nothing. He slowly pulled himself out of the hug and looked at his father for any kind of emotions; all he could see was a mixture of what looked like anger and guilt.

Brian was so angry with himself right at this very moment. He had just lost his chance to respond to his sons embrace and he wasn't sure why. He had wanted to hug his son ever since he got here, but something held him back. He could see the hurt look on his son's face when the hug ended, but he didn't know what to do. All he could think to say at that very moment was, "Is something burning?"

Ryan's eyes went wide; he turned and ran to the kitchen shouting, "My sauce, it's burning".

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Author's Note: It's been awhile since I wrote any new chapters for this story, but now that my other CSI Miami story is done I can devote more time to this one. Let me know what you think.


	10. Chapter 10

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After Ryan tended to his spaghetti sauce he no longer felt in the mood for a nice dinner with the family. In the last few minutes something had changed and he was extremely confused. He had finally remembered something, but when he shared it with his father he was turned away. He no longer felt like eating and didn't even care to see his family before they left. He turned off the stove, grabbed his car keys and headed out the door. He didn't really know where he was going, but he knew he needed to get away for awhile.

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3 hours later Brian Wolfe found his son. He had gotten worried when he couldn't find Ryan after he had gotten excited about remembering something. He had called Calleigh to find out if she knew where he might have gone, but she didn't have a clue. She said that even if she knew his favorite hangouts, he wouldn't remember any of them so he could be anywhere. She had a trace done on his credit card and found out that the he had used it at a small bar in downtown Miami.

As Brian entered the bar he noticed the kind of establishment it was and thought that Ryan would never be caught dead in such a filthy place. After looking at a few of the occupied tables he finally found his son in the corner. At first glance it appeared as if he had passed out, but as he sat down he could see that he was awake, but for some reason had his eyes closes. "Hey Ryan, you had me worried. I thought we were having dinner together?"

Ryan finally opened his eyes and saw his father through his blurry tired eyes. He had been sitting here for awhile now and probably had a few too many drinks, but he didn't feel like going home. "How did you find me?" was all he said.

"I had your friend Calleigh help me. She had a trace put on your credit card; which led me here". He looked around the place again before adding, "Why did you choose this place anyway? This is not the type of place you would hang out at".

The statement pissed him off and in his drunken state it came out in the form of slurred shouting, "Well I'm sorry to disappoint you father. Tell me then; what kind of place should I have gone to then. Maybe if you helped me to understand who I was before, maybe if anyone who claimed to be my friend helped me understand then I may have gone to the right place. But you know what father, it seems like no one really knew who I was before and for some reason you don't seem to like who I am now". Ryan stopped his shouting long enough to find out his glass was empty. He raised it up in the air and shouted toward the bartender, "Hey bar man, I am in need of more of what ever this stuff was I was drinking". He looked at his father, momentarily forgetting his anger, "Hey dad, do you want something? Hey bar man, bring my father something to drink to". He turned back to his father, "So where were we,,,,, oh yeah, I remember, I was saying something about you not liking who I am now and that's why you haven't even tried to comfort me or hug me or anything. What are you going to do if I never remember who I was, are you still going to love me". As soon as he finished his head fell forward into the table and he passed out.

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Ryan opened his eyes and instantly regretted it. The sun pouring into his room was so bright it made his head hurt. The rest of him didn't feel that great either. As he looked around the room his eyes stopped on the figure of his father curled up on the one and only chair he had in the room. Why was his father sleeping in here, did he have a fight with his step mom? That didn't seem likely so what was the reason. His only way of finding out was to wake him up, "Dad, what are you doing in here?"

Brian was only half asleep. His son's chair was less than comfortable when it was used as a bed. He opened his eyes and turned his head at his son's question. "Good morning, how are you feeling?"

"Not so good, but you didn't answer my question, what are you doing here, in my room? The only time you ever did that was when I had a nightmare or something". As soon as the words were out of his mouth he realized that he had just remembered something else from his past, but decided not to mention it this time.

Brian also decided not to mention Ryan's second memory. He focused on last night's events instead, "How much do you remember from last night?"

Ryan didn't have to think long as it all came flooding back to him. All he could say was "Oh, about last night, I'm sorry".

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry. Had I been honest with you, last night might not have happened".

Ryan was confused, "what do you have to be sorry about. I got totally drunk last night and you helped me get home. And if I am correct, you also helped clean me up after puking my guts out the rest of the night and early morning".

Brian got up and sat on the bed next to his son, "No, I'm not sorry about that, I'm talking about earlier. You came to me and were so excited about remembering something and all I could do was stand there. You were waiting for a hug from me and I didn't give it to you and for that I am sorry. I am also sorry for not being totally honest about your childhood".

Ryan's confusion turned to fear. Did something bad happen in his childhood? He had totally forgotten about the events that led to his night at the bar. He was scared to find out but he had to ask, "What about my childhood, I don't understand?"

Brian didn't know where begin. He started out by talking about the accident that took his wife and both sons away from him. He told him how he hadn't remembered anything about this past when he woke up in the hospital and up until yesterday he had not remembered anything from before the accident. He told Ryan it had been too much for him to handle yesterday and that is why he didn't share the excitement about his memory. He had been waiting so long for those memories to come back that he forgot all about it and had learned to accept his new son. He had moved on with it and everything he had felt in the past years came back at the one moment. He also had to admit that there were some old tendencies that he didn't recognize at first, but as he thought about it last night he was seeing bits and pieces of his little boy the whole time he had been here. As he finished he could see this was hard for Ryan to take, but he felt better for having said it. He knew his son would eventually feel the same way once he had time to let it all sink in.

Ryan didn't say anything while he father was talking. He just couldn't believe what he was hearing. He had lost his memory before, but why had no one told him. So for all the past years he was really someone else having forgotten who he really was. And now here he was again unable to remember anything from before his accident. No wonder his father had acted that way when he told him what he remembered. His father had no idea that his memories from before his first accident would come back. This was almost too much to take in. He just looked at his father and said "Wow, this is one screwed up situation. So now what do we do. I'm only asking you since it appears you've been through this before".

"Well, all we can do is move forward. I spent so many years waiting for you to come back that I wasted time in getting to know the new you. I think that is why we never really connected after the accident. Listen, I really have to be getting back home today, but I am going to call you every night so we can talk. Maybe you'll remember more and this time I will be there for you to help you. Who knows, it might help you remember everything else as well. But know this, no matter what you may not remember, please remember that I love you". He reached over and finally gave his son a hug. He held on to him for several minutes not wanting to let go. He could feel Ryan felt the same way. Why had he waited so long to do this?

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Ryan had spent the rest of the morning with his father. He really didn't like the fact that he was leaving today, but his father did promise to talk to him every night, a promise he was going to make sure was kept. After waving to his father's taxi he went inside to take a nap. He still felt like crap and thought he would feel better after he got some more sleep. He also thought some rest was in order since he was going back to work tomorrow, well at least shadowing someone while they did their job. The doctor felt it was a good idea to get him back to work as soon as possible since it might help him get his memories back. He wasn't allowed to work a case by himself, but he was being allowed to assist in the processing of evidence.

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Author's note: Well, this chapter came together quicker than I thought it would. More to come soon. Thanks to those of you who left me a comment so far. I really appreciate you sticking around with this story.


	11. Chapter 11

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-FYI, in my story Alexx is still the M.E.

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Ryan was actually excited about today. He was being allowed to go back to work for a few hours each day to get reacquainted with his job. He had a really good feeling about today since he really hadn't forgotten how to do his job. His doctor could not explain why he could remember how to do his job, but everything else was gone. Memory issues were very different for each person who experienced and Ryan's case was no different.

As Ryan drove to work he took in everything he saw. He was really struggling to recognize anything along the way but by the time he arrived at work he had nothing. He wasn't especially worried about this since he didn't even know if he was taking the same route he always did or if was going a new route; which in that case he shouldn't have recognize anything anyway. He had seen that there were several ways to work and he had chosen the most likely one.

Ryan parked his vehicle and stepped out into the parking lot. At first he just stood there staring at the building. This was his first time here; he had not visited since his accident. He was at first reluctant to move toward the building since he didn't really know where he should enter, but as he watched other people he soon found his way. He went through the doors and came into what appeared to be the main entrance. So far nothing looked familiar, but he didn't let that get him down. Just like his time in the parking lot, he was once again unsure of where to go. He stood there trying to decide when he heard someone call his name.

"Ryan, it's so good to see you back to work".

Ryan waved to the person who called his name and then watched them walk off in the other direction. He had only been here for a few minutes and he was starting to feel apprehensive about coming back so soon. If this was any indication of how his day was going to be, he didn't know if he was ready. Just as he thought about making a run for it back to his car he once again heard someone call his name.  
Fortunately he knew who that voice belonged to. He turned around and said "Good Morning Calleigh".

"Good morning Ryan". Calleigh was in a good mood today and she didn't try to hide it from anyone. "So are you excited about coming back today?"

"I think so, but I'll let you know when my day is done. So who will I be working with today?" He had not been told of the details of his return to work, only that they would tell him on his first day. He just hoped they gave him an easy first day. He was still healing from his accident and his arm was still in a cast making it difficult to do a whole lot.

Calleigh could tell by the look on his face that he was worried about his assignment. "We thought we would keep you at the station today since it was your first day back. We thought that you could work with Alexx today".

He liked the idea of staying here today, but he didn't know if he liked where he was working. He had gotten the chance to hang out with Alexx on numerous occasions since he was in the accident and he liked her, but he remembered how she described her job and he not to eager to be working with dead people.

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Before Calleigh had shown Ryan where he would be working, she gave him the grand tour of the building and also took the time to introduce several people to him. The place was bigger than it looked on the outside and there were definitely more people that worked here than he thought. He just hoped he could remember everyone he met today.

The last stop on the tour was the locker room. Ryan went over to the locker with his name on it and just stared at it. This was proof that he worked here, but when he tried to get into his locker he was unable to open the lock. "Um Calleigh, I don't remember the combination. Is it written down somewhere?"

Calleigh handed him a piece of paper. "I already have that covered. I talked to human resources yesterday and they had your combination on file".

"Thanks". He used the numbers on the paper to open his locker. When he looked inside he found a few personal items, but nothing to get excited about. He closed it and turned to Calleigh, "Well that was exciting. I don't know what I was expecting to find in there. So I guess I should go and find Alexx".

Calleigh assumed she would need to show him, "Well follow me then and I will let you get to work".

"If you don't mind I would like to find it myself, I think I remember where it is". All through the tour he had made several mental notes on where certain rooms were, but paid close attention to the M.E's office since he knew he would be working there today. If this was going to work he needed to find his way around this place and not rely on his friends and coworkers to help him.

Calleigh smiled at Ryan before saying "I think that is a wonderful idea. I'll come by and check on you later to see how it's going".

"Sounds great, I'll see you later". He waited until she had left before exiting the room. As he stood in the hallway he had to think very hard on which way was the correct way to find Alex. He decided to go left and as he walked down the hallway and around the corner he was grateful to see that he had chosen correctly. Before he knew it he was standing at the entrance to the coroner's examination room. He was hesitant to enter since he had no idea of what to expect. A few moments passed before he had the nerve to open the door and walk inside.

Once inside he looked around quickly and spotted Alexx hovering over something. As he walked over to her he saw what it was that she was examining. She was in the process of extracting some internal organ from the person who was lying on the table.

Alexx looked up just in time to see Ryan's face go pale as he stood there watching her. "Hey baby, I was wondering when you were going to get here". She finished with the liver by placing it onto a scale and came over to stand closer to Ryan. "So, I can see some things have not changed with you. I remember the first time you came in here your face went so white at what you saw. But I can promise you you'll get use to it, you did before".

Ryan spent the next 3 hours helping Alexx with various parts of her examination. She was right about one thing, the more he was around the body the more he got use to it. As he was cleaning up the area the sound of someone walking in caused him to stop what he was doing. He looked up and saw that it was Calleigh. She was true to her word about checking up on him. "Hey Calleigh, how's it going?"

"I was just about to ask you the same thing. How was your first day back?"

"It was long, or at least it felt that way, but it feels good to be back even though I can't remember what it was like before".

"Great, so we can expect you back tomorrow then?" She grinned at him before adding, "Hey a bunch of us were going out after work and we thought you might like to join us".

Ryan thought about it for a few seconds before replying, "Yeah sure, that sounds good. I just need to finish cleaning up, but I should be ready to go after that".

"Sounds perfect. Do you want to ride along with me or do you just want to follow me to the bar?" She wasn't sure he knew where it was so she thought she would offer both ideas.

"I can just follow you since I do need to learn where everything is around here, especially if this is a common event around here". He didn't know if this something he did with these people or not, but he thought it sounded like fun.

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It had taken Ryan about 30 minutes to clean up the work area and another 10 minutes to get himself cleaned up, but now he was ready for a night out with his co-workers. He hopped in his car and followed Calleigh to a place that was not too far from work. From the looks of the parking lot it was a very popular hangout. After driving around for a few minutes he finally found a spot that was a good distance from the front door. He got out and started walking toward Calleigh's car, which was a lot closer to the building. "Hey Calleigh, this looks like quite the place. Is this the usual hangout?"

"Yeah, you could call it the usual hangout for a few of us. It's a great place to unwind after a stressful day". She matched Ryan's pace as they made their way to the front entrance.

Once they were inside Ryan looked around and as usual didn't recognize anything. The place itself was just as crowded as the parking lot and the music was loud; but at least he liked what he heard, "So who is meeting us here anyway?"

"Eric and Natalia were coming and I think Alexx said she would try a little later". Calleigh around the place and finally spotted who she was looking for. "I see Natalia, she's over there". She waited for Ryan to join her and the both of them walked over to the table where Natalia was seated.

Natalia looked up from her drink "Hi Ryan, Calleigh, looks like a good crowd tonight doesn't it". She took a sip from her glass before continuing "How was your first day Ryan? I'm glad you could join us tonight".

Ryan smiled as he took a seat "First day was good, I'm looking forward to tomorrow. So is this something I did with you guys often".

Calleigh didn't give Ryan's question a chance to be answered as she got up and asked "so Ryan, what can I get for you, I'm buying the first round".

As soon as he realized what Calleigh was asking him he thought about his previous night's excursion to the bar. He really didn't want to repeat that mistake again so he replied to Calleigh by saying "I think a nice ginger ale sounds good".

"Oh come on, don't you want something stronger".

"Maybe later, but for now I think I'll lay off the strong stuff".

"Ok then, I'll be right back". Calleigh went toward the bar leaving Ryan and Natalia to talk.

Ryan felt a little awkward sitting there and he wasn't sure what to say while waiting for Calleigh. He thought he would ask his earlier question again, "So did I come here with you guys often?"

Natalia smiled at Ryan and was about to answer him when she was distracted by a woman who suddenly started calling out Ryan's name.

A tall slender beautiful woman who looked like she was in her early 20s came over to the table "Ryan, is that you. I thought that was you when you came in here, but then I thought to myself it couldn't have been. I thought you told me that you hated this place, so what made you change your mind?"

Ryan had been staring at the woman while she talked waiting for his chance to ask his usual question, "I'm sorry, but do I know you?"

The woman looked very offended "What, after 3 dates you've forgotten me already. I guess I should expect that from someone who obviously wasn't very truthful with me. Sure you hated this place, is that why you're here with her?" Her tone sounded like she disapproved of Natalia being here with Ryan.

"I'm really sorry, but I don't remember you. I was in an accident that left me with amnesia". He thought she would probably have a hard time buying this. She was already so pissed at him and for what he didn't know.

"Oh right, you expect me to buy that story. If you wanted me to get lost you could just say so". She was ready to leave but for some reason decided to wait for his response.

"I can't prove it to you, but I really don't remember you. Can you tell me your name; maybe we can start over again. I really would like to talk to you, maybe buy you a drink". He thought she was pretty, but he was more interested in finding out what she knew about him.

She seemed to calm down a bit as she replied "Are you serious, you honestly don't remember me". She seemed to buy what he said and decided to sit down next to him "My name is Melissa and yes you can buy me a drink".

"That's a nice name, what are you drinking?" Ryan had turned his full attention toward Melissa; forgetting all about Natalia.

Natalia cleared her throat to get their attention, "Ryan, why don't you sit here and talk with Melissa while I go and get another drink". She shot Melissa a cool look before returning her gaze at Ryan, so can I get your friend a drink then?"

It was as if Melissa had done a complete turnaround. She answered Natalia with a new sense of charm that was lacking earlier "Yes that would be great, I'll take a white zombie if you don't mind". As soon as she was done ordering her drink her attention went back to Ryan.

Natalia walked off toward the bar leaving the two of them to talk. On her way up she ran into Calleigh and told her they had company at the table.

Calleigh arrived at the table to find a woman sitting with Ryan and she was chatting up a storm. "So who's your friend Ryan?" She handed him his ginger ale and sat down.

"Hi Calleigh, this is Melissa. Apparently I had 3 dates with her and now we're catching up on old times". He looked over at Melissa and smiled. "Melissa, this is Calleigh, we work together".

Melissa took her eyes off of Ryan long enough to acknowledge Calleigh, "Hi Calleigh".

As the night progressed Eric and Alexx joined them and they all spent the next couple of hours talking and having a pretty good night.

Ryan looked at his watch and saw that it was getting late. He was tired and thought he better call it a night. He had fun with the group, but as he walked out to his car he had to wonder if he really enjoyed this kind of stuff before the accident. Melissa had indicated that he said he didn't like the place. He had wondered why throughout the night and now that he was leaving he wasn't really sure what he thought about the place.

Ryan headed home so that he could be rested up for his second day at work. Once home he felt the urge to clean up the place a little bit before heading off to bed.

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	12. Chapter 12

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Ryan woke up to the smell of smoke, the sound of screaming and the feeling of doom. He looked around but saw nothing but darkness. He tried to move so he could locate whoever was screaming, but he found that he was stuck. He felt around to see what was holding him and realized that it was a seatbelt. As he struggled to release the belt the screaming became more intense followed by silence.

Ryan was finally free of the belt and moved about, feeling for whatever was around him. From what he could tell he was in the back seat of some kind of vehicle, but how did he get here? As he felt around some more he started to see the source of the smoke. It was coming from the front of the car; which seems to become more intense as he stared at it. He wanted to get out of the car and run, but now that he could see his surrounding better he looked around for the source of the screams. What he saw made him sick to his stomach. Imbedded in the windshield was a woman who had been thrust so hard that the upper half of her body was sticking out of the car while the rest of her rested on the steering wheel. He couldn't see her face very clearly since the glass was shattered, but he knew who she was and was terrified that her screams had stopped, he was starting to panic when he was unable to get out of the car to help her. He started banging on the doors and windows shouting her name the whole time, hoping she would hear him. Nothing seems to work, he was trapped with no hope of rescue and it would be his fault if she died. As the fear took over he screamed her name one last time, "Mother".

Ryan bolted up from his pillow covered in sweat. He looked around and found that he was no longer in danger. The smells and sounds were replaced with the rhythmic sound of his clock ticking away and the smell of the fabric softener he had used to clean his sheets. He wiped the moisture from his face; telling himself that it was only a dream. But what a dream it was, he wasn't sure what it meant, but it seemed so real.

He got up from bed and made his way to the bathroom. According to his clock it was 3am. It wasn't time to get up, yet he was pretty sure he would not be able to go back to sleep. He turned the bathroom faucet on to the coldest setting and splashed the water on his face. It didn't completely wash away the images from his dream, but he felt a little better.

He went into his kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. He took a seat on his recliner and leaned back closing his eyes. Images of his dream came back forcing him to open his eyes. It was just a dream, but there was something nagging him about it ever since he woke up. For the next couple of hours the images from his dream plagued his every thought. By the time the alarm in his bedroom went off he was a mess. After listening to the buzz from his clock for a minute he reluctantly got up and turned it off. He had set his alarm to help make sure he was not late for work, but the way he felt at the moment, work was the last thing he wanted to do today. He didn't want to do anything at all.

He thought maybe a walk around the neighborhood would help clear his head. He put on some clothes and headed outside. It was an overcast day that looked like it could start raining at any second, but this didn't deter him. He had no specific route to go so he just started walking. He put his hands in his pockets and watched the few people who were up so far, probably heading off to work. He knew he should go back and get ready, but so far the walk didn't change the way he was feeling.

He must have walked about a mile so far and decided to sit down when he saw he was at the entrance of a small park. There were a few people there with their kids, but otherwise the place was empty.

Ryan suddenly realized that he had been staring at a mother and her 2 kids for how long he couldn't remember. He might have kept on staring but she noticed him and ushered her kids out of the park. He didn't mean anything by it, but he wondered if she thought he was a pervert or something. He didn't blame her for getting her kids away, there were plenty of nuts around here and you couldn't trust anyone.

After they left he looked at his wrist to check the time, only he had forgotten his watch. Well it didn't matter that much. He knew he had been sitting for awhile and was already late for work. Thinking about work again he found his mind starting to drift off again.

Out of nowhere a hand flew to his cheek giving it a hard slap as a voice uttered "Ok Ryan, what the hell are you doing, get your butt up and go back home". He rubbed his cheek and knew it was time to go. He just wished he had not slapped his own face so hard, but he had found himself doing this a lot lately. He didn't know if this was a habit he had in his other life, but he was getting sick of it. He got up and slowly made his way to the sidewalk for his long walk home.

-

On the way home the rain that had been threatening earlier finally showed up. By the time he got home he was cold and wet and ready for a shower. Walking past his phone he noticed there were a couple of messages on it. He pressed the button and listened to 2 messages from Calleigh and Horatio wondering if he was coming in to work today. He didn't think anymore of the messages as he headed to the shower.

While he was in the shower his mind once again wondered off to a place he didn't know. Had it not been for the cold water suddenly pouring from the shower head, he may have stayed in there longer. He dried off and changed into a pair of sweats. He grabbed a towel and started wiping the steam off the mirror. Expecting to see his reflection staring back at him he was surprised to see the face of a little boy. He rubbed his eyes and was now staring at his own face. However, the image of the little boy's face was still on his mind.

-

The rest of his day was very uneventful. He never did go to work and just stayed home sitting in his living room thinking. He would have kept on sitting there, but the phone rang again and he thought he'd better answer it. "Hello".

"Hi Ryan, we finally got home and I thought I would call you to see how you're doing".

"Hey dad".

"Is now a good time to call, because if it's not I can call you back". He could tell by the tone in his son's voice that he may have disturbed him.

"No, you don't have to call back, I wasn't doing anything".

The call lasted for about 20 minutes, but it was enough time for Ryan's father to know something was wrong. He could hear something in his voice, but he wasn't sure what it was. He knew his nightly calls were going to be more important than ever.

Ryan was glad his dad called, but it didn't change the way he felt. There was something wrong and after a whole day of thinking about it he wasn't sure what to do. This life he was living didn't seem to be working and he felt like ever since he woke up in the hospital after his accident he was just kidding himself. He didn't know how he was supposed to act or know how anyone really felt about him. So far he was pretty sure nothing of his life before the bus accident had come back to him, but would he remember it if it did. This was driving him nuts and he felt like he could lose his mind, if he hadn't already done so. He didn't know what his dream from last night meant, but it seemed to be the source of this feeling.

All he could think to do was go to bed since it was past being late. Sleep was what he needed and maybe he would feel different in the morning.

-

Ryan woke up to the smell of smoke, the sound of screaming and the feeling of doom. He looked around but saw nothing but darkness. He tried to move so he could locate whoever was screaming, but he found that he was stuck. He felt around to see what was holding him and realized that it was a seatbelt. As he struggled to release the belt the screaming became more intense. As he released the belt he sat up and looked around. Instead of the car he was just in, he found that he was in his own bed covered in sweat. It was just a dream, but it was the same dream from last night.

All attempts to fall back to sleep failed. The remainder of the night was such a long and depressing one that by the time the sun starting rising in the sky, Ryan could no longer take it. He put on some clothes, jumped in his car and sought out a new distraction. He didn't know where he was going or when he was coming back, but he didn't care. He just wanted to escape.

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	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

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Monday had been the first day that Ryan had came back to work so not showing up on Tuesday was understandable since he probably tired himself out, but not showing up on Wednesday was not going to be tolerated. Horatio had agreed to let him come back to work on a limited time basis so that he could slowly ease his way back to his job and could eventually be evaluated to see if he could come back full time, but now he was beginning to think he made a mistake. The mistake wasn't the fact that Ryan had not shown up to work without calling, it was more of a question on whether or not Ryan was ready to come back. Horatio couldn't even begin to understand what a person who could not remember anything was going through, but he thought that perhaps Ryan was not dealing with the situation as best as he could. After talking to Human Resources it was agreed that they would insist that Ryan see someone who could better evaluate when his return to work would be. They were not going to penalize Ryan for his insubordination, but rather treat it as if he was still off from work recovering. They would hold his position pending a thorough checkup from the right kind of doctor.

Horatio still couldn't help but worry about him. Where had he gone? He had tried calling both his home and cell phone but no one answered. He sent Calleigh over to his place only to find that he wasn't home and his car was gone. A quick talk with the neighbors didn't reveal much, except that one had seen him walking in the rain on Tuesday morning.

Calleigh had called Ryan's dad and found out that they had talked last night, but he had nothing further to add except that he had a strange feeling after their conversation. He thought something was the matter, but it was too late to ask about it since they had already ended the phone call. Calleigh told Horatio who was still no closer to figuring out where he was. All he knew was that he was home yesterday and must have left sometime in the morning hours. All they could do was wait for now and hope he contacted them. If they had not heard from him by the end of the week Horatio was going to officially declare him missing.

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After driving for a few hours, Ryan realized that he was starving and decided to stop at the next place he saw that looked decent. It didn't take long when he spied a small mom and pop diner that looked clean enough. He parked his car and went inside; where he was greeted by someone he could only assume was the owner. She was an older lady who was way too friendly for her not to own the place. She told him to sit where he liked and from the number of people he saw in the place it was not hard to choose. There were only two tables left, one of which was by the window. He sat down and ordered a cup of ice tea when his waitress came over. He looked over the menu and decided he would have the lunch special; since he just missed them serving breakfast.

It wasn't long before his food arrived. The special turned out to be meatloaf and mashed potatoes which looked good, but after eating a few bites he found that he really wasn't hungry after all. He sat there playing with his food when the older woman who he had taken to be the owner walked over to this table. "Hey there, meatloaf not to your liking? I can get you something else if you like". The smile on her face seemed to contain an element of concern; as if she was worried he didn't like her cooking.

He looked up from his plate and weakly smiled back, "No, it's not your food, which was really good. I just don't think I was as hungry as I thought I was when I first came in here".

She took a chance and decided to sit down at his table, "You're not from around here are you? Just driving through are you?"

"No, I'm not from around here". He didn't feel like talking and didn't really like the intrusion into this space, but he decided to keep it to himself.

"So where are you headed then, if you don't mind me asking?" She could see something was troubling him and thought it might help if he talked about it. It was her nature to be nosey and she found strangers had the best tales to tell; if they were willing.

He thought that if he didn't answer she might go away, but after a minute of awkward silence he finally decided to say something "I don't really have a destination in mind. I just felt like I needed to get away".

"So where are you from then?"

"Miami".

"Oh, I've been there before, but I can see why you would want to get away. There is so much crime there that I didn't feel safe. Well, I won't keep you then. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't the food that prevented you from finishing. Tell you what, since you weren't hungry in the first place I won't charge you for the meatloaf, just the ice tea".

"No, That's ok, I'm sorry I wasted it but I wouldn't feel right about not paying you for it". He put a twenty dollar bill on the table and started to get up and leave.

The restaurant owner stood up at the same time and grabbed Ryan's hand. "Now I insist that you not pay for the meal. I think you should only pay for things you have eaten". With one of her hands she grabbed the money and shoved it in his hand. "Now I want you to promise me that you'll stop by here again when you're in the neighborhood and share a meal with me, can you do that?"

Ryan nodded his head and gave the woman a small smile. "I promise I'll stop by again".

She walked with him to the door and watched as he walked toward his car. "Remember, next time you're around you be sure and stop by and ask for Rosy". She waved at him and walked back inside.

Ryan got into his car and just sat there for a few minutes before driving off. He still had no idea of where he was going but still didn't feel like going home. He looked back at the restaurant and thought the woman inside was strange but nice. It was nice to know there were still decent people left in the world. He made a point of stopping back here on his way home. He turned on his car and continued in the same direction he was headed before he pulled over for a bite to eat.

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After another hour of driving he knew it was time to pull over for gas. His tank was almost on empty and he didn't want to take a chance of running out. He stopped at the first gas station he saw. It was a dumpy little place but as long as it had gas to sell it was good enough for him.

He got out and started pumping gas into his car. While he waited he leaned up against the car and shut his eyes. He was getting tired and didn't know if he wanted to keep going. He was running from something he didn't remember and running to somewhere he had didn't know. Maybe he was just being silly about this and should just go home. Did it really matter if he couldn't remember anything, was it enough to ruin any kind of life he may still have left. He knew he kept asking himself this every day, but what else was left. He was still alive and was pretty sure he knew how to perform his job so why wasn't that enough.

"Hey buddy, watch what you're doing?"

Ryan heard the question and opened his eyes to see gas pouring all down his car. "Oh Shit", he grabbed the hose and pulled it out of the car as he as stopped the flow of gas. What kind of gas pump was this, he thought they all stopped pumping when they detected the tank was full, but apparently he found the one gas pump that didn't do that.

"Hey buddy, you all right?"

Ryan looked up to see who was talking and found that it was an older man with a dog. From the looks of it the man must be out walking his dog. "I'm sorry, did you say something".

"You looked like you were deep in thought there, something wrong". The older man continued to just stand there watching as Ryan cleaned up the spill gas on his car.

"Thanks, I don't how this happened". He was purposely avoiding the man's question. He just wanted to pay for his gas and get the heck out of here.

"No problem". He watched as Ryan went into the station to pay for his gas and then continued his walk.

As Ryan entered the station he saw something that he didn't know was a good thing or not. The young girl standing behind the counter looked very uncomfortable. As he went over to the refrigerator to grab a Pepsi, he saw that there were 2 other people in the station. One was standing by the back door and the other one was standing close to the counter looking at the girl. On his way back to the counter he grabbed a bag of peanuts.

He put his stuff down on the counter and said "I had some gas as well, pump number 3 I think". He watched as she rang up the items and how she kept looking toward the guy standing to the left of her. "Hey I should probably tell you that I spilled some gas out by the pump. I think the nozzle needs to be looked at since it didn't shut off when it should have".

The girl looked directly at Ryan and it looked like she was scared to say anything, but finally managed to say "Thanks, I'll mention it to someone in the morning. It comes to thirty five eighty six".

He handed her his credit card and watched out of the corner of his eye as the other man who was previously by the back door move closer to the front door. There was something he didn't like about this whole setup, but who was he to say anything.

He took his card back and signed the credit card receipt "Thanks". He grabbed his Pepsi and walked out toward his car. He had just opened his car door when he realized he had forgotten the peanuts he bought. "Damn".

He walked back toward the doors and froze in place at what he saw. The one man who was standing closest to the counter had a gun and was pointing it at the young girl. The other man was at the register pulling out they money. Ryan instinctively reached for his gun, only to realize he didn't have it with him. "Damn". Instead he ducked toward the building and hid behind the ice machine. He pulled his cell phone out and called 911. As soon as he heard someone answer he said "I'm at the gas station off of route 12 and it's being held up". He listened to the person on the other line and responded by saying "My name is Ryan Wolfe and I am a CSI with the Miami Dade police. There are 2 people in the station and they are holding a gun on the girl". He heard them say that they would get someone out there but continued to ask him some questions which he replied to "No, I don't have a gun, I'm standing outside of the store watching it happen, you need to get here quick".

He held the phone up to his ear in an attempt to listen to the 911 operator when he heard a loud crash from inside the store. He moved the phone away from his face in order to take a quick glance through the window. He saw one of the guys shove the girl into the back room while the other one pushed the fallen snack stand out of his way before following his friend. He didn't like where this situation was headed and felt the need to help her.

At this point something else had taken over and he was no longer thinking about himself. All he could think of was the safety of the girl inside. He tried to open the front door only to find it locked. He went around back and found that the back door was also locked. How was he going to get inside; he needed to think? He looked around and saw that one of the windows on the side was opened and low enough that he could climb into it if he stood on something. He dragged a barrel over to the window and found that it was just high enough for him to get inside. He slid through opening and moved through the bathroom to the closed door. He slowly opened it and was relieved to find the other side void of the two men. He quietly stepped outside the room and saw that he was very close to the back room where the girl was. Suddenly he heard a scream and then heard one of the men yelling for her to shut up. He looked around and grabbed the broom leaning up against the wall. Without thinking he burst through the door and swung the broom at the first guy he saw. One quick blow was all it took to take the guy out. Unfortunately he didn't' have time to get his broom up for a second swing at the other guy. He felt someone grab him from behind, but in his defense his casted arm went up behind him making contact with the other guys face. This caused him to step back in pain, giving Ryan just enough time to swing his cast at the guy again; this time taking him out. Now both men were lying on the floor.

He ran over to the girl to check up on her when he heard some commotion coming from the front of the store. Before he could say anything he found himself facing the barrel of a gun and someone yelling. "Step away from the girl and put your hands up".

Ryan did as he was told but needed to gain control of this situation "Whoa, I'm a cop. I'm the one who called this in".

The cop who was holding the gun on Ryan didn't seem to care and continued to yell "Step away and put your hands up". ]

The girl who was just rescued came to Ryan's defense "Stop Andy, he saved me".

Andy the police officer looked over at Penny and said "What are you saying, this guys ok then?"

"Yes Andy, you should probably take care of the guys on the floor before they wake up".

Andy looked at the floor and saw who Penny was talking about. He lowered his gun on Ryan and said, "Sorry, you can imagine this looked like a hold up".

"No problem, I'm just glad you came to your senses before doing anything". Ryan lowered his hands and glanced at his cast. He could see that he managed to put a crack in it during the fight.

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Ryan was asked to stick around until they had his statement; which from the looks of it was going to take awhile. They had ushered the two guys away in one of the police vehicles and were in the process of talking to the girl. There was also someone there who looked like an EMT tending to the girl. They also looked at Ryan and told him that he needed to have his arm looked at to see if it needed to have a new cast on it.

Ryan was hoping they would be getting to him soon so he could take off when one of the officers walked up to him and handed him a phone, "We needed to verify your story so we called the Miami Dade police department. There's a Horatio Caine on the other line and he said that he wants to talk to you".

He took the phone from the officer and held it up to his ear saying "Hello".

"Ryan, I want you to stay put. I'm coming to get you". Horatio had already asked that they keep him there while he drove the 3 hours to get there. He could have let Ryan drive home, but he didn't want to take any chances that he would take off again.

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Author's Note: I must be honest that I don't really know what to put in the middle of this story so some of these chapters might not make the best sense. There are a few things about this chapter that I wanted to convey in my story and this was the best way of doing that. I won't say what those are yet, but they will be revealed in a later chapter. Please let me know what you still think of this story. I do know how I want it to end, but I'm just not sure exactly how I plan on getting there.

I would be mighty grateful if you stuck around for more. Thanks to those who have been leaving me a review.


	14. Chapter 14

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One of the police officers had asked Ryan to drive to their little police station in town so that they could get his statement on what went down at the gas station. They had also had someone come over and take a better look at his arm to make sure he didn't injure it further. They brought some cast material and plastered it over the damaged part, thus allowing him some time to get to his own doctor for further evaluation. Ryan was not happy at how long this was taking, but he figured they were told to keep him there until Horatio arrived. He would have loved to have bailed out of town, but as he sat there thinking over the events of the day he decided to stop running and face his life head on. Here he was in a strange town where he knew no one and he still managed to save a young girls life. He figured that even though he may not remember anything before the accident, he obviously had a knack for law enforcement.

Ryan was sitting in the stations break room resting his eyes when he heard a door open and a voice say "I'm glad you waited for me. Are you ready to go home now?" He didn't have to open his eyes to know who the voice belonged to.

Horatio moved closer to Ryan and waited for some kind of response. He knew the young man was not sleeping, but he didn't want to make any wrong moves for fear of scaring him away. He was there to take him home and that was what he planned on doing.

Ryan finally sat up and opened his eyes. He looked around the room before spotting Horatio standing off to his left. "Hi Horatio, you know I could have driven myself home".

"I know, but I thought it would be a better idea if you let someone else do the driving so you could rest. Don't worry about your car either; I brought someone along who is going to drive it home for you".

Ryan was wondering about that and was glad that Horatio was on top of things. "Thanks H, I really appreciate that. I am kind of tired now that you mention it".

Horatio helped Ryan up to his feet and noticed the cast. "I think having someone look at your arm is in order, but it can wait until tomorrow. Now let's get you home". He guided Ryan out to his car and was glad he didn't resist the personal attention.

The other person Horatio had brought along with him had already taken the car ahead, leaving the two of them alone as they drove the 3 hours back to Miami. The ride was silent for the first hour and a half as Ryan dosed off in the passenger's seat.

Horatio was just getting use to the silence when from out of nowhere he heard Ryan scream. The sudden noise scared him enough to make him momentarily lose control of the car. Luckily there were no other drivers on the road to contend with. As he got the car under control he pulled off to the side of the road to check on Ryan.

He looked over to see that Ryan was rubbing his head looking very confused and disoriented. "What's wrong" was all he could think to say. He didn't know if Ryan screamed out of pain or from something else.

Ryan looked over at Horatio, "What, where am I?" He quickly looked around and then remembered he was in the car on his way back home. "Oh, sorry Horatio, I was just forgot where I was for a second".

"Can you tell me what happened, did you get hurt back at the gas station".

"No, I'm sorry. I was just dreaming and I must have had a nightmare, that's all". Ryan didn't want to talk about it anymore and hoped that Horatio was satisfied with his answer. He clearly remembered his dream and didn't want to discuss it since it was the same dream he had 2 other times in the last couple of days. He decided not to sleep for the rest of the drive home.

Horatio had to be satisfied with the answer since he knew Ryan was not always willing to share his feelings with others. The rest of the ride was uneventful and quiet.

-

As Horatio drove into Miami he thought he better tell Ryan his plan for the next couple of days. "I thought it might be better that you stay with someone for a few days. I have an extra room so I had someone bring over some of your things to my place. Now before you say anything I know you are very capable of being on your own, but there seems to be something going on and I thought it would be best if you had someone around to talk to, if you needed it". He had never reached out to Ryan before and this was very hard for him to offer, he just hoped the young man would be willing to accept.

Ryan didn't know what to make of his offer, except that he was too tired to argue. "All right, I'll stay tonight, but after that I am going home".

Horatio was happy with the answer, he figure he would work on having him stay longer after he had a good night's rest.

-

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Ryan entered Horatio's home and was surprised. He didn't know if he had ever been here before, but said, "Nice place you've got Horatio".

Horatio walked over to the stairs, "There should be a change of clothing in the room at the top of the stairs. I had Calleigh bring something over".

Ryan made his way upstairs and sat down on the bed. There was a small duffel bag sitting on the chair and he figured it contained his stuff. It looked like it contained more than a day's worth of clothes; he just hoped Horatio didn't expect him to stay longer. As he was thinking there was a slight knock on the partially opened door. "Come in".

Horatio came in carrying a couple of towels and placed them on the dresser. "The shower is down the hallway. I thought you might like to wash up before dinner". Without saying another thing he walked out of the room.

Ryan was once again alone in the room. He got up, grabbed the towels and walked down toward the bathroom. Perhaps a shower and a bite to eat was just want he needed.

After he showered and changed he walked downstairs to find Horatio busy in the kitchen, "Something sure smells good".

Horatio was happy to see Ryan looking better, "I hope spaghetti sounds good, it's the only meal I'm good at cooking. Take a seat at the table, it should be ready soon. Can I get you something to drink?"

"Sure, whatever you have is fine".

Horatio brought over a pitcher of ice tea and poured Ryan a glass. "There is sugar on the table if you like your ice tea sweetened".

"Thanks, and I'm just not saying that for the ice tea. I want to thank you for everything you did today. I don't really know what got into me. Ever since my dad left I just have not felt the same".

"My first priority is to make sure you're all right. I can't imagine any of this has been easy on you. I talked to your father earlier today and he told me that you know about the accident you were in as a child. None of that can be easy to deal with. I also want you to know I have taken care of work for you and you will be allowed to return on one condition. I would like you to talk to someone about everything that has happened to you. They will be the ones to determine when you can return to work full time".

"Ok" was Ryan's only reply.

Horatio served the dinner and Ryan ate what he could. He didn't say much to Horatio while he ate and excused himself when he was finished saying that he was tired; which was the truth. As he closed the door to his temporary room, he didn't know if he wanted to fall asleep. He was afraid of having the same dream again. He sat in the chair and turned on the T.V that was sitting on the dresser. He started watching some show on the food network and tried to stay awake, but he lost the battle. He was soon fast asleep in the chair.

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Horatio had cleaned up after dinner and went to his own bedroom for some sleep. It had been a long day and he hoped that tomorrow would be a nice normal day for everyone; especially Ryan.

He grabbed his book and crawled into bed, hoping to get a few chapters in before falling asleep. Just as he found the page where he had left off he heard a terrible scream from Ryan. He got up and rushed into the other room. He found Ryan sitting on the floor next to the chair. "Ryan, what's wrong". He rushed over to him and sat on the floor next to him. He could see that Ryan was very upset over something and he wondered if he had another nightmare. "Did you have another dream?"

Ryan wasn't aware he had company until he heard Horatio mention the dream. As he heard this he looked up at Horatio. He was trying to keep the tears at bay, but he just couldn't get the image of his mother and brother out of his mind. "It's my fault; I tried to save them but their dead because of me. I can still see my mother, it was horrible Horatio. There was so much blood everywhere and I couldn't do anything to save them".

Horatio saw the pain in Ryan's eyes and did what he thought best. He reached over and pulled Ryan into a hug. He didn't know what to say so he just held him in his arms waiting until he calmed down. When he felt the sobs stop he pulled Ryan away just far enough to say "come on, let's get you to bed". He helped him into the bed and then sat in the chair making sure fell asleep. He decided it was best to stay with him tonight. Tomorrow he would make sure he talked with someone who could hopefully help him. Horatio wasn't sure what was going on, but it seemed like he was finally remembering something, only it was of his first accident.

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Author's note: do you think Horatio was too mushy at the end. I didn't know if I would have him do this or have someone else, but in the end I thought he would be the best choice.


	15. Chapter 15

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Ryan woke up to find Horatio asleep in the chair next the bed he was in. The events from last night were a little fuzzy, but he did remember having the dream again and Horatio coming into the room. There was one good thing though, he had not had the dream again and was able to sleep the rest of the night.

As he got up out of bed he must have made enough noise because he saw that Horatio had woken up. "Good morning H. Sorry about keeping you up last night".

Horatio stretched as he stood up from the chair, "No problem, I'm just glad you were able to get back to sleep. I take it you didn't have any more dreams, or at least another one like you had last night".

"I slept the rest of the night, thanks. I want to thank you for letting me stay here last night, but I think that it would be best if I went home". Ryan didn't know how he would take it, but he had to mention it.

"No Mr. Wolfe, I think the best place for you is right here. I am sure you would be fine at home, but I would just feel better if stayed".

"Maybe one more night, but the minute I feel like a burden I am going back home".

"If that is what you wish, then I will not stop you. First thing we need to do is get dressed and have some breakfast. After that I plan on taking you to see Dr. Felton. He is an expert on helping people who have suffered amnesia associated with severe trauma. He is going to be the one who will evaluate your progress and approve your return to full time work. But in the mean time when you are not with the doctor, I have asked that you work with me for a few hours a day".

Ryan knew that Horatio was only doing to out of concern. He just hoped it helped get his life back together. "Sounds good Horatio, I really appreciate you doing this for me".

Horatio walked to the door of the room and turned to address Ryan, "so, why don't you get ready and I'll have breakfast ready".

Ryan waited until he left before going through his duffel bag for a change of clothes. After he finished in the bathroom he was feeling pretty good. He went downstairs and found Horatio in the middle of making some coffee. "So what's for breakfast?"

Horatio poured 2 cups of coffee and brought them over to the table where Ryan was sitting. "I need to make a run to the grocery store, but I had some eggs and ham, so I made you an omelet". He went over to the oven where he had 2 plates inside to keep the food warm. He brought the plates over and handed one to Ryan. "There is salt and pepper on the table, I don't know how good they are, but I think they are at least edible".

Ryan took the plate from Horatio and tried a bite before putting any additional seasoning on them. They needed some salt, but otherwise he thought they tasted pretty good. "These are good, thanks".

Horatio could see that Ryan was at ease here. He hadn't known how Ryan was going to take the idea of staying here, but was glad to see it was working so far. He just hoped it would last for a few more days. "I'm going to go and get dressed, so finish up your breakfast and I'll be down to take you to see the doctor".

After Ryan finished up with breakfast he decided to clean up the kitchen. He felt it was the least he could do. When he was done, he was feeling very relaxed. He had enjoyed cleaning up; he would have to remember this next time he was feeling stressed.

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Horatio had come down stairs after about 20 minutes and was surprised to see the kitchen spotless. He went into the living room and saw that Ryan was sitting on the couch reading the morning paper. He looked back at the kitchen and had to wonder if some of his deep rooted tendencies associated with his OCD were coming back. This had to be a good sign, as it might signal a return of his memories. He made a point to mention this to the doctor.

-

Dr. Felton was an older man who had been working as a psychologist for the past 25 years. He mostly worked with victims of severe trauma, but on occasion worked with the police department. He had received the call yesterday from Alexx Woods and was more than happy to see Mr. Wolfe. He had a lot of work to do, but he owed a favor to Alexx and told her he could squeeze him in on short notice.

He was sitting at his desk when he heard a knock as his door, "come in". He stood up and waited for his visitors to come in. He observed the 2 men who entered his office and was able to instantly tell which one was Mr. Wolfe. He was the one whose face was pale and had a lost faraway look in his eyes. The man also looked like he had not been sleeping much either. He walked over and made his introduction, "Hello, you must be Horatio Caine and Ryan Wolfe", he shook each man's hands before continuing; "I'm Dr. Felton. Please take a seat".

Ryan and Horatio took a seat and waited while Dr. Felton took his seat behind his desk.

"So I thought we would spend today talking about you Mr. Wolfe. After today I'll know what direction our future sessions should take". He looked at Horatio, "Now Lt. Caine, it you could please wait out in the other room, I would like to start the session. We should be done in about an hour".

Horatio got up and left the room. He knew he wouldn't be permitted to stay, but he just hoped the first session went well.

"So Mr. Wolfe, I would like to keep these sessions very informal. Let's start by having you tell me about yourself".

The rest of the session was mostly Ryan talking about everything that had happened after he had woken up from the accident. When he was done, he felt better having unloaded everything that was on his mind; well almost everything. He left out everything about his first accident, which included the dreams he was having.

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After they left Dr. Felton's office Horatio took Ryan to another doctor so he could have his arm looked at. Luckily his arm had healed enough that he could have his cast removed, but he still needed to take it easy.

"Wow, I am so glad to have that removed". He flexed his arm as best as he could, but he knew it would be awhile before it felt normal. "So what are we doing now?"

"Well, I have taken the day off and would like to know what you want to do".

Ryan was caught off guard by this. He thought it was enough that Horatio had asked him to stay with him, but now he was willing to do whatever he wanted. He thought about what he might like to do and all he could think about was how much he enjoyed going to the zoo. "Can we go to the zoo?"

This was exactly what he had in mind when he took the day off, but if this is what Ryan wanted to do then he would go along with it. "Sounds like a plan".

Horatio drove the both of them to the Miami zoo. The place was crowded with tons of kids and their parents. At first Horatio felt awkward being there with Ryan, but as they walked around looking at the various types of animals he learned a lot more about his CSI. He learned that Ryan really enjoyed looking at the tigers and prairie dogs. He had to wonder if these were his favorite when he was a child. When Ryan had asked him what his favorite one was, he said that he always enjoyed the polar bears.

As they headed out of the zoo after seeing most of the animals Ryan had to ask "Hey, do you mind if I run into the gift shop?"

Horatio didn't have a problem with it, but he just hoped Ryan didn't expect him to go in there. Shopping was something he didn't really enjoy. "Sure, I'll wait over here for you".

"Thanks, I won't take long".

Horatio watched as Ryan disappeared into the shop before walking over to the bench to sit down. He looked down at his watch was surprised to see that they had been here for 3 hours. It certainly didn't feel like it. As he sat there watching other people leaving the park, he saw Ryan had finally come out and he was carrying a bag. He wondered what he would have bought at a gift shop located at the zoo, but what it was he looked happy about it.

Ryan walked over smiling at Horatio, "hey, I just want to say thank you for bringing me here. I know this may be silly, but I wanted to get you something". He reached into the bag and pulled out a small key chain that had a polar bear dangling on the end of it.

Horatio took the key chain from Ryan, "Thank you Ryan".

Ryan smiled, he was glad that Horatio took the key chain. He had no idea if he would ever use it, but he thought it was the most practical gift that had a polar bear he could find.

Horatio drove the both of them back to his place. He told Ryan to go and rest while he prepared dinner. Tonight he decided he was making grilled cheese and tomato soup. This was always one of his favorite meals to eat, he just hoped Ryan agreed.

30 minutes after getting home, he called Ryan down to eat. Dinner was quick, but the lingered afterward just talking. He told Ryan that tomorrow he would once again see Dr. Felton, but after that he was going to work for a few hours.

Ryan was happy about the chance to go work. This time would be different since he would be working with Horatio. "So that was a great dinner, but I think I should get to bed, for tomorrow sounds like a big day". He walked up the stairs to his room. After he crawled in bed, he was asleep within minutes.

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	16. Chapter 16

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Ryan woke up to sunlight streaming through the window. He sat up and rubbed his face, ready to start the day. As he was getting ready for his appointment with Dr. Felton, he finally realized one thing that had occurred last night. He had slept the whole night without having his nightmare. He just hoped last night was not a fluke and he would continue to have more dreamless nights. He hoped the way he felt right at this moment would last.

He went downstairs to find it empty. He figured Horatio must still be sleeping, so he decided it was his turn to make some kind of breakfast. When he couldn't find enough ingredients he decided he would offer to take him out for breakfast before heading to his appointment.

While he waited to Horatio to come downstairs, he made coffee and looked at the morning newspaper. Just as he was finishing up with the comic section he heard someone coming down the stairs. He looked up and said "Good morning Horatio, I have decided to take you out to breakfast, since you don't have much food for me to make anything".

Horatio smiled at the idea, "That sounds good and I know the perfect place that is not too far from Dr. Felton's office".

Horatio once again drove them to their destination. The restaurant was not too crowded so they were able to get right in.

"Wow, this looks like a nice little place to eat". Ryan looked at the menu, "and from the looks of it there are plenty of items to choose from. I think I am in the mood for some pancakes and bacon".

"That sounds good; I think I'll have the same".

After their food orders were placed with the waitress Ryan decided to engage Horatio in some conversation. "So what do you think we'll end up doing this afternoon?"

"I'm not sure, but I want to keep it low key for you this week".

"Ok, that sounds reasonable. Oh, I forgot to mention that while you were making dinner, I briefly talked to my father on the phone. When I mentioned what we had done in the afternoon, he laughed and told me that before my first accident the zoo was one of my favorite places to go".

"I wonder if it's a coincidence that you chose that place then. From what you've told me you have been able to remember some things when you were younger. This might just be another memory for you". Horatio was hopeful that this was the beginning for Ryan to regain all of his lost memories.

The two of them talked some more about work before the food came. Once the food was brought they ate in silence. As Ryan was finishing up he noticed that Horatio had grabbed the bill, "Hey, since this was my idea I should pay for breakfast".

"Maybe next time, we need to get going or you're going to be late for your appointment". He paid the check and waited for Ryan to finish with his orange juice before getting up.

The two of the drove to the doctor's office and Horatio dropped Ryan off telling him that he would be back in 2 hours to pick him up. He knew that this second meeting was going to be longer and he really didn't want to sit and wait when there was a lot to do at work.

-

Ryan walked into Dr. Felton's office and waited for him to come and get him. He was a few minutes early. As he waited he looked around the waiting room and had to wonder how much this guy charged. From the look of the décor, this man had expensive tastes. He had gotten up to give one item a closer look when he heard someone call his name. He turned around and found that the doctor was ready for him. He followed him into the office where each took a seat.

"So Ryan, how are you feeling today?"

"I'm feeling pretty good actually".

Dr. Felton looked at Ryan and commented on his response "I can tell. You look a lot more rested today, more so than the last time we met".

Ryan nodded his head as he said "Well, I got a full night's sleep last night".

"So, you were not sleeping well, why was that".

Ryan didn't really want to talk about his nightmares, but he had to remember that he was here to talk to the doctor, "Well, I've been having dreams in the middle of the night and have not been able to get back to sleep".

"Tell me more about these dreams. Are they different each night or are they the same".

Ryan was all of a sudden nervous. He was not ready to talk about his dream. After telling Horatio about it he never brought it up again since it would bring the horrible images back. He looked over at the doctor and could tell that he waiting patiently. He looked like he could sit there all day waiting for him to be ready to talk. As he thought about it, the doctor's patience should not be a surprise. This is what the doctor did for a living. "Well, ummm, it's pretty much the same dream". Ryan grew silent again trying to wish away the fear he was feeling inside. He looked over at the doctor again who still had the same look on his face, "The dream is actually more of a nightmare. I don't even know if it is real, but as soon as I wake up there is nothing I can do to fall asleep again".

The doctor could see that Ryan was struggling. He was afraid that his patient would get to the point where he was not willing to discuss the dream so he had to push the issue, "I would like you to tell me about this dream. If it is causing you to lose sleep it must mean more that we think".

After a minute of total silence Ryan decided he needed to talk about it. This may be the one thing keeping him back from moving forward. "Each dream is pretty much the same each night. It seems so real to me, but I don't know since I can't remember things. It starts with me waking up strapped inside a car. I cannot get out of the seatbelt and I hear screaming". He stopped as the sounds of the screaming start piercing his brain.

Dr. Felton noticed Ryan put his hands over his ears as he mentions the screaming, "Are you hearing the screams right now?"

Ryan's thoughts were disrupted by the doctor's question. He was momentarily brought back to the present and continued "Yes, the screaming is very intense. As I look around in the dream I see that I am in a car that has just been in an accident. I am in the back seat and as I look in the front seat I see the legs of a woman; the rest of her body is on the other side of the wind shield". This time Ryan puts his hands over his eyes as the horrible image fills his eyes.

"Keep going Ryan, do you know who this woman is?"

Ryan looked up from his hands to see's Dr. Felton's comforting face staring back, "She is my mother. She is screaming and I can't get out of my seat to help her. She stops screaming; it's my fault because I can't help her". He stopped and gave the doctor a wide eyed look, "I'm sorry, I don't think I can talk about this anymore". He got up and left the room in search of the bathroom.

After Ryan's abrupt exit, Dr. Felton decided to look at the medical history file he had finally received from his patient's childhood physician. As he looked it over he saw there was a copy of the accident report when Ryan was a child. He read it over and saw that the accident killed his mother and brother. The mother had been sent flying through the windshield. She did not die immediately on impact and was stuck in the window for about 20 minutes before help arrived. The brother was a little luckier as it stated he died instantly after being thrown out of the car. The report said that they found Ryan wedged in between the front seat and the back seat and had to be cut out. He lived, but spent awhile in the hospital after suffering a head wound, a collapsed lung and broken leg. It mentions a small part about his amnesia, but as Dr. Felton looked through the papers he found that there were a few more times Ryan was examined by a doctor, but each time they stated his prognosis as 'only time would tell' if his memory ever came back. There was nothing about having the boy see a specialist. This was not the typical protocol for someone who suffered amnesia.

Ryan came back into the room to find the doctor looking at a folder. He figured it was probably his medical chart, but he didn't feel like asking. "I'm sorry about my quick exit. I just needed some time away, but I am feeling better".

"I'm glad to hear that. I took the opportunity to look at the details of your first accident. From what I read, I can tell you with some degree of certainty that I know what your dreams are telling you. You said that it was a dream of your mother. It appears she was wedged in the front windshield after the accident. This sounds like the details of your dream. I think that your mind is struggling to remember something; anything, and it has gone back to the first time you lost your memories. I think your sub consciousness is trying to tell you something".

"So what I am seeing in my dream is what really happened to my mother?"

"To some extent, yes, I feel that you are reliving parts of the accident, but there are a few things that don't add up. You stated in your dream that it was only a seatbelt that separated you from your mother, and that it was your fault that she died. According to the report, you were pinned in by the front seat and suffered trauma to your leg and chest as well as your head; you were in no condition to get out and help your mother. As for why you continue to have the dream, I feel you're trying to tell yourself something but you're not listening well enough to stop the dreams".

Ryan could see the doctor was making sense with this explanation. "So you can help me get rid of these dreams then?"

The doctor contemplated Ryan's question a moment before saying, "There is one thing I might be able to try, but I will need your permission".

"What is it?" Ryan could hardly contain his curiosity.

"I would like to hypnotize you into remembering the accident. I think there is something that happened that day that you managed to block out, but in blocking out one thing, you caused yourself to forget everything else. Do you think you would be willing to try this?"

Ryan had to think about the doctor's idea for a few minutes before replying, "If you think it would help, then yes I am willing to try it".

Dr. Felton darkened the room in preparation. He had Ryan sit in the recliner and asked him to get as comfortable as he could. When he felt Ryan was ready he asked that he concentrate on his voice while he slowly led Ryan back to the fateful day that took not only his mother and brother, but his memories. "Ok Ryan, today is the day that you were in that terrible crash with your family, but I want you to remember what was going on before the car ran off the road". He waited, giving Ryan time to think back to that day before continuing, "Tell me what you see?"

Ryan's eyes were shut as he started to talk, "I'm sitting in the back seat of the car. My mother is driving and my brother is sitting next to me".

"Are you doing anything in the car?"

I'm fighting with my brother and mom is getting a little agitated with us. We had just come from the grocery store, so in an attempt to get my brother to stop I reach into one of the bags. I throw something at him". Ryan stopped, the memory was not as clear as it was a second ago.

Dr. Felton senses that Ryan is losing the image so he tries to have him focus on details of that day, "What did you grab out of the bag to throw at him".

"It was a bag of chips, which opened up as I threw it at him. The chips went everywhere, but my brother won't stop harassing me so I grab a plastic container and throw it at him. The container opens up spilling some kind of sticky dip inside. We both start laughing, but mom is so mad she looks over at us in the back seat and yells at us to clean it up before stains anything. We keep laughing and mom threatens to pull over, but before she can she hits something". He stopped at this; the memory was just too much for him to take.

"Well, I think we can stop for now. Our time is up anyway". He writes something in Ryan's file and says, "We can discuss what you told me tomorrow, but for now I believe Horatio will be waiting for you at the front entrance".

"Thank you doctor". He turned and walked out the door. He made his way to the front to see Horatio waiting for him. He got into the car and looked out the window, thinking about the accident even more now. Maybe he would be able to forget all about today once he got back to work; even if work was just going around with Horatio as he did his job.

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	17. Chapter 17

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After arriving at work with Horatio, Ryan spent some time in the lab going over DNA results from a case that Horatio had been overseeing. He still felt like he knew what was going on when it came to work. He wasn't sure, but he thought that he may have even surprised Horatio with his insightful observations and calculated conclusions.

When they were done in the lab Horatio needed to interview a potential suspect in the same case associated with the DNA. The suspect was the boyfriend of the murder victim.

Horatio and Ryan went into the interrogation room. Ryan was asked to just sit and listen to the questions and then afterward they could talk about it. Ryan was glad that he was just an observer in this case. While he still remembered aspects of his job, he was not ready to dive right in and start doing it. Many of the tasks that he was helping Horatio with still felt foreign while doing them. After 35 minutes Horatio was done with the boyfriend and told him to stay close since they were not done with him. Ryan thought that the boyfriend was guilty, but they just didn't have enough in the case to get a solid conviction so they had to keep digging.

As they walked away from the room discussing the case, Ryan noticed that the day was almost coming to an end. "So, what else are we going to do before going home?"

"I don't know, maybe we can call it an early day. What do you say?" Horatio was in a good mood. He normally would not shorten his day, but he enjoyed having Ryan back. He was very surprised how much he still knew about the job.

"That sounds like a plan". The more Ryan thought about this the more he liked the idea.

"So, have you decided to stay with me longer then?" Horatio had not wanted to bring up the topic until it was closer to the end of the day, so now he just hoped Ryan would be willing to stick around.

"Yeah, I think that I can stay at your place a few more days. I like knowing that I am not alone. That might be why I started having the nightmares after my father left".

As the two of them were on their way to Horatio's place, they came upon a backup of traffic. As they got closer they saw that there was a multiple car accident that must have just occurred. There were people walking around in a daze and there were no emergency vehicles on site yet. Horatio decided that he would take charge of the situation until additional help arrived. He turned and looked in Ryan's direction. He didn't know if Ryan was ready for a car accident so he told him his plan, "I am going to go help out with the accident, but I think it would be best if you just stay with the car until I get back. I will only stay until additional help arrives".

Ryan had already made up his mind, "No, I think I might be needed. It looks like a pretty bad accident and you should not have to deal with it by yourself. I'll be fine, I can really do this".

"Alright, but if it becomes too much for you I want you to come back to the car, OK?"

Ryan nodded and then followed Horatio out of the car and up to the scene of cars piled into one another.

As they got closer they could see that there were at least 4 cars involved and it didn't look good. Horatio accessed the situation very quickly and then flashed his badge, all the while giving out orders to people who were just standing around. He saw that Ryan was just standing there staring at the scene and thought that maybe he should just send him back to the car, but this might just be the one thing he needed. "Ryan, go over and look to see if there is anybody stuck in the little black car over there. It looks pretty smashed up".

"OK" was all that Ryan could say before moving toward the wreckage. He didn't know what to expect, but thought it could not be good. The little car looks so smashed up it was almost unrecognizable as to what type of car it once was.

There was no one around when he reached the car, but as soon as he was closer he could hear someone begging for help. He looked in the car and saw that there were 2 people inside. There was a small child still strapped in their car seat and then there was a mother who was crushed in between the front seat and her steering wheel. As soon as he saw the woman he froze.

-

As Horatio tended to one of the crash victims he finally heard the sound of sirens coming close. As soon as there were more people to help he looked around to see where Ryan was. He looked over and was just in time to see someone shove Ryan away from the car as they worked on it. He walked over to see what was going on. "Ryan, is everything alright over here?"

Ryan just stood there staring at the car from his new vantage point. He barely acknowledged the person shoving him out of the way and didn't even seem to notice anyone speaking to him.

When Horatio didn't get a response he put his hand on Ryan's shoulder and said "Ryan, are you OK?"

As soon as he felt something on his shoulder he jumped away from the source of the touch. He looked to see what it was that had touched him and found Horatio looking back at him; his eyes filled with concern. "What? Did you say something, I'm sorry I". Ryan stopped mid sentence to look over at the car as the night filled with the sounds of something cutting through the car. He looked back at Horatio, "I can't do this Horatio. I just don't think I can do this. I wanted to help her, but I just didn't know what to do".

Horatio was concerned by Ryan's behavior. He was not making much sense and his eyes seemed kind of glazed over. He took hold of him and started moving him out of the way. On the way back to the car he was approached by one of the EMT's.

"Hey, is this one of the people that was involved in the accident, I should probably take a look at him". The EMT was looking very intently at Ryan.

"No, he was here to help, but I am going to take him out of here now".

"He doesn't look so good; maybe I should take a look at him just to be sure. Some people can't handle this kind of scene".

"No, I appreciate the offer, but I think your needed elsewhere tonight. Thanks". Horatio continued to usher Ryan away from the scene. He was a little worried at his silence and hoped he didn't make a mistake by not having him looked at.

-

Soon they were back in their car. The traffic was still slow, but it was being re-routed and soon they were on their way back to his place.

As soon as they got home Horatio helped the still silent Ryan into the house. He had him sit on the couch while he went and got him something to drink.

"Here Ryan, I want you to drink this and then just lay down on the couch while I make dinner". Horatio handed him the glass and stood there making sure that he was not going to spill it. Once he had taken a sip Horatio took the glass and then helped him lie back on the couch. Horatio removed his shoes and laid a blanket over him before heading back to the kitchen to make dinner.

-

He had just added pasta to a pot of boiling water when the phone rang. "Hello".

"Hi Horatio, this is Brian Wolfe. I was just trying to call Ryan's cell phone and couldn't reach him. Is he still staying with you?"

"Yes, he is just lying down on the couch right now. I'll go and see if he is able to talk right now". Horatio walked into the living room to find the couch empty. "That's odd; I thought he was napping on the couch. Maybe he went upstairs, can you hold on for a second?"

"Sure, I'll wait". As Brian waited on the other line he thought that it was taking Horatio an awfully long time to find Ryan. Suddenly he heard Horatio calling out Ryan's name, but he could not hear any response from Ryan.

"I'm sorry Brian; I can't seem to find Ryan. I just left him on the couch to lie down. He was very quiet after we got home, but I figured he would be alright if I went into the kitchen".

Brian could hear the concern in Horatio's voice, "What's going on, did something happen tonight?"

"We got stopped along the way by a massive car accident. We went to help and I think that Ryan froze at the site he saw". Horatio was angry with himself for thinking Ryan could have handled the accident. He was starting to get worried since he had looked in most of the rooms while on the phone and there was no sign of Ryan.

"Did you check the bathtub? After his first accident I found him in the bathtub quite often. He said it made him feel safe".

Horatio had already checked the bathroom and didn't see him, but he never checked the bathtub. He walked into the upstairs bathroom and slowly opened up the shower curtain. "Brian, I found Ryan. I need to call you back after I've talked to him?"

Horatio turned off the phone and sat down on the toilet next to the tub. "Ryan, you gave me quite a scare. I didn't know where you had gone to. Can you tell me what's going on?"

Without looking up Ryan said "I don't really know what is going on Horatio. Something about tonight just made all the memories come flooding back and I froze. I wanted to help the woman, but I just couldn't get myself to move. Am I going nuts Horatio?"

"No, you are not going nuts. What happened to you is something that most people would have a hard time getting through. I'm sure this is a normal feeling for anyone in your situation". He stood up and stretched his arms out to Ryan "Here, let me help you out of here. Dinner's ready so we should probably go down and eat it before it burns".

Ryan allowed Horatio to help him up and out of the bathtub, but he resisted any further help once he was out. "I don't really feel very hungry right now. I think I'll go lie down in bed if you don't mind".

"Not at all, I'll make up a plate for you to heat up later if you feel like". Horatio walked Ryan to his temporary room and waited until he was lying on the bed before going back downstairs.

The rest of the night was relatively quiet. Horatio thought that Ryan was sleeping, so he took the chance to crawl into his own bed. The thing that Horatio was unaware of was that Ryan wasn't asleep. He was afraid to shut his eyes for fear of the dream coming back. He just sat there on the bed contemplating what he should do next. He could wonder down to the kitchen for more caffeinated beverages or he could go out for a walk. He decided he would do both since he didn't think either one would last for too long.

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	18. Chapter 18

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Ryan grabbed a can of Mt. Dew and headed outside. At first he just sat on the steps leading to the front door. He looked around Horatio's neighborhood and thought this would be a great place to raise kids. During the day the kids would be playing outside and with one another. They didn't seem to fear the world around them. Their parents also seemed to be right there to make sure nothing happened to them. When he found out where Horatio lived he thought that it was an odd place for him to live since there were so many families around and he was just a single guy. But in the short time he was staying here he knew why Horatio chose this place to live. It was a nice relaxing place to unwind after work.

There were no kids out playing now since it was after 10 at night. They were all safe and snug in their own beds. He got up and decided to walk down the sidewalk toward the park. He didn't know if he liked the park when he was a kid, but the sound of playing on the swings was appealing at the moment.

He took his time walking, stopping occasionally to look up at the sky. The night sky was clear and full of stars and he was fascinated with them. At one point he was so caught up in looking at the sky that he didn't see that there was a deep crack in part of the sidewalk. He chose to look up just at the point his foot reached the crack. He went down hard on the concrete, landing on his previously broken arm. He also scrapped his hand pretty badly as he used it to brace himself. He felt embarrassed by this and was glad that no one saw it. He sat up and rubbed his arm before standing back up. He thought about going back to Horatio's, but he decided against it since he saw the park up ahead. As long as he was this close he might as well go the rest of the way. His arm hurt a little and the scrap on his hand was bleeding, but it wasn't too bad.

He entered the park and saw that it was filled with all kinds of fun things for kids to do. It didn't take him long to find the swings and soon he was sitting on one going back and forth all the while looking up at the stars. He was feeling so relaxed he forgot about the car accident victims.

He was still sitting on the swing; lost in his own little world when the sound of several voices broke his concentration. He stopped and looked over his left shoulder to see who was talking and saw that it was several young men. They didn't look like they belonged here and Ryan had to wonder what they were doing. He hoped that they were just passing through. As he watched them he realized that they were not just passing by. They had cans of spray paint and were using them to trash the equipment in the park. He knew he should get up and say something but it was late and he was only one guy against 6 teenagers. He may be a cop, but he knew when he was outnumbered.

He was trying to sit on the swing as quietly as possible in hopes of going unnoticed. At first he thought it worked since they stayed on the other side of the park, but it didn't last long. One of them looked over in his direction and then said something to his buddies before pointing in his direction. It was only a matter of seconds before the group was headed his way. He thought about making a run for it, but why should he. He was the adult; who was also a cop, and they were a bunch of kids.

As the kids came over one of them spoke up, "Hey, what do we have here. Aren't you a bit old to be playing on the swings?"

Another one the kids responded by saying "Hey, does your mommy know you're out here at this time of night?"

Ryan didn't know what to do. They had all reached him and were now surrounding him as he still sat on the swing. He didn't want to make any sudden movements but he decided to try and talk to them, "Hey, I just came out for a walk and ended up here. I'm just minding my own business".

The kid that had spoken first said "Is that what you call it? Well I would say that you're in our business now and we don't like it".

"Hey, I don't know what you're talking about, but if you just let me leave you can have the whole park to yourself".

"Yeah and as soon as you leave you'll go call the police on us. You adults are all the same". This time it was a new kid who had spoken.

Ryan stood up to say something but soon regretted it as he felt hands on his shoulders pushing him back down on the swing.

The kid who had spoken first said "Hey, we didn't say you could leave. Why don't you enjoy the swing some more. Hey Eddie, why don't you help him".

Ryan felt himself being pushed and then all of a sudden the swing was being twisted around. He saw that several of the boys were taking turns spinning him around and around. He had no clue how he was going to get out of this one. He tried to use his feet to stop the spinning but this only seems to piss the boys off. They started to get more aggressive with the swing and before he knew it he went flying to the ground. He heard nothing but laughter coming from the boys and thought that they might be distracted enough that he could get away from them.

He got up only to be pushed back down.

"Hey, I didn't say you could get up. We're not done with you".

Ryan didn't know which one said that, but he just stayed right where he was. As he was down, he starting getting angry with himself. He was a cop so why was he allowing these boys to intimidate him. He should just get up and threaten to arrest them if they didn't leave him alone, but something was holding him back. He was afraid if he did something it would make matters worse**. **

One of the boys who had remained silent up until now said, "So, what do we do with this guy. He's kind of boring so I say we just leave him be and find something else to do".

Another boy responded by saying, "No, I think there is still a little more fun to be had with him".

Before one of the boys responded a new voice suddenly filled the air and said "I think you should listen to the boy and find something else to do".

The same boy who thought there was still more fun to be had said "Hey, who are you to tell us what to do"

The newcomer responded, "Do you really want to know who I am. If you do you'll be talking to me down at the police station". As the last words were Horatio walked out of the shadows and faced the boys. He didn't have his gun drawn, but he made sure they saw his hand resting on it while it was tucked in his pants.

The boy who has spoken last replied for all of his friends, "Hey, we don't want any trouble. We'll leave him alone. Are we cool now?"

"We're cool now as long as you get the hell out of here right now". The tone in Horatio's voice showed the boys he meant business.

The boys took off running leaving Horatio and Ryan alone. Horatio went over to help Ryan up and said "So, what are you doing out here by yourself?"

Ryan was feeling relieved now that he was away from the boys, "I needed to go for a walk and I just ended up here. I am so glad you showed up when you did".

They walked back to Horatio's place in silence. Ryan was tired and thought that maybe he would be able to get some sleep after all of this.

Ryan lay down and before he knew it he was fast asleep. However it wasn't long before he sat up in bed screaming.

Horatio woke to the sound of someone screaming and was up and out of bed within seconds. He ran down the hallway and into Ryan's room. He found him sitting up on bed hugging his knees. "Ryan, did you have another dream about your mother?"

Ryan responded to Horatio without looking up "No, she wasn't there. All I remember is being on a bus with a bunch of kids".

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	19. Chapter 19

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Ryan was able to get back to sleep and luckily didn't have any more dreams. When he woke up the next morning he felt like crap. Even though he was able to sleep he knew he could still use more, but he had to go and see his shrink again.

He was silent during breakfast and said very little during the ride over to see the doctor. When Horatio arrived at the doctor's office he told him that Calleigh would be picking him up today. When he asked Horatio what they would be working on he was told to take the day off and spend it with Calleigh.

"Did I do something wrong H, why is Calleigh spending time with me today. I thought I would be going to work with you?" Ryan thought that perhaps he had done something and Horatio no longer wanted to work with him.

"No Ryan, nothing is wrong. I just think you need a break and since Calleigh had the day off she offered to spend it with you. You can come back tomorrow".

Ryan had no choice but to accept this. He watched as Horatio drove away and then went inside to see the doctor. He must have been late because he was sitting on the couch waiting for him. "I'm sorry, am I late or something?"

"No, you're not late. I just didn't have any other clients this morning and I thought I would wait for you out here. So how have you been since our last appointment?"

"I've been good". Ryan was going to tell him about last night, but he was waiting until the session started.

"Then why do you look so tired and distraught? Please come into my office and tell me all about it". He could tell there was something wrong and didn't want to waste any time in finding out.

They both sat down in their usual chairs and Ryan began by telling him of his adventures last night and of the latest dream. This gave Dr. Felton an idea to have him go back to the day of his last accident so that he could figure out the commonalities.

As Ryan described what happened on the bus right before it crashed the doctor was busy asking questions and jotting everything down. He was starting to piece together a few things and wanted to discuss it with Ryan when he was done.

"Ok Ryan I am going to bring you back to the present time and day. Can you tell me where you are now?"

"I am in your office".

"That is correct Ryan. I believe I may have come up with something this time. Your dreams are allowing you to remember each of the accidents for some reason and I feel there may be a connection. It appears that in both accidents you were involved in an incident right before each of the crash and I think that you may be feeling responsible for each of the accidents". Dr. Felton stopped in order to write something down in Ryan's chart and didn't say anything until he was finished, "I believe that a sense of guilt became so overpowering that it caused you to forget the accident, but unfortunately it made you forget everything else as well".

"But why am I dreaming about the accidents. I don't get what the connections are". Ryan put his head in his hands. He was getting so tired of all of this and just wanted it to end.

"I think your subconscious is trying to tell you something. At this point I am only speculating what the dreams may be telling you, but I would like to keep on working on this with you. Perhaps your dreams are trying to show you that you do not need to feel guilty and the more you allow yourself to realize this, the more of your memories will return". The doctor looked at the chart briefly before continuing "you mentioned before that some of the pictures of your childhood are familiar to you. You have also mentioned that you have had strong feelings about things like the zoo and just last night you found yourself at the park because it was something you remembering liking. I feel your dreams may be helping you sort out everything and it may just be a matter of time before you remember everything".

"So you're saying that my memories are slowing returning then?" Ryan was feeling a little hopeful.

"Now I don't want you to get your hopes up. I don't know if your memories will return or not. It may just be that you get bits and pieces or you may get it all back. I am still only speculating on this, but in the meantime all we can do is wait and see". He looked at his watch and realized that their time was up. "Well, I think we can continue this at our next session. I have to apologize that we cannot meet until next week, but I am sure there will be much to discuss when we meet again. If you do need me for anything you can reach me at this number". He handed Ryan his business card and then saw him to the door.

Ryan went outside and saw Calleigh's car. As he got closer he saw that she was sitting in the front seat reading a book. When he reached the car he said, "Hi Calleigh". He opened the door and got inside. "So, what are we going to do today?"

Calleigh started the car and pulled away from the curb before answering his question, "Since it looks like rain I thought we could do something indoors. How does the museum sound?"

"Sounds good". Ryan leaned his head back into the seat and closed his eyes. He was still tired and decided to enjoy the ride in silence.

Calleigh noticed Ryan's eyes were closed, but she knew what had happened last night and thought it was better to let him rest. It would be at least 30 minutes before they arrived at the museum.

-

Once they were at the museum Calleigh had to wake Ryan up. They spent the next 4 hours looking at just about everything and ended the tour with a nice lunch at a local restaurant that was close by.

After their afternoon adventures Calleigh drove Ryan back to his place so that he could pick up a few things to take back to Horatio's place. He had decided that he would still stay there, at least until his nightmares stopped.

As Ryan entered his condo he looked around and thought it looked very messy. He didn't think he had left it like this and was kind of embarrassed when Calleigh came in after him. "Sorry about the mess in here. Maybe I should clean it up a little before we go, do you mind waiting?"

"No, I don't mind, but it doesn't look that bad to me. Can I give you a hand?"

"No, I can manage. Please make yourself at home". He went into his room and grabbed what he was looking for before tidying up the place.

Calleigh watched him as he cleaned and realized that this was the first time she saw a part of the old Ryan she knew. He was always funny about how clean things should be and she had to wonder if this behavior was starting to come back.

-

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After Ryan was dropped off at Horatio's he felt wiped out. He sat on the couch and turned on the TV. When he couldn't find anything suitable to watch he grabbed a magazine off the coffee table. It was all about firearms and it didn't really keep his attention for very long. He set it down and got up from the couch looking for something to do. He still felt tired, but he was too restless to relax. He went into the bathroom and within minutes he was on his hands and knees scrubbing the floor. For some reason this made him feel better.

By the time Horatio came home he instantly noticed a nice smell to the place and couldn't help but notice how everything in the kitchen and bathroom looked spotless. He looked for Ryan and found him sleeping on top of his bed; clothes and shoes still on. He went over and removed his shoes and put a blanket over him. He hoped Ryan had a good night sleep with no interruptions.

-

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Ryan woke up and realized that it was morning and that he still had his clothes on from last night. He also noticed that his shoes were on the floor and there was a blanket covering him. He thought it was odd that he would have laid down and taken his shoes off but left his clothes on. He had to wonder if Horatio had anything to do about this and felt slightly embarrassed about it. Maybe this was a sign that it was time for him to go back home.

He got up and headed to the bathroom for a shower. He was finally feeling rested and was looking forward to the day. He just hoped that Horatio would let him go to work today.

He headed down stairs and started the coffee and made some toast for himself. He had just finished eating when Horatio walked in.

Horatio went over and poured himself a cup of coffee before addressing Ryan, "Good morning, did you sleep well last night?"

"I don't remembering waking up last night so I think I finally got enough sleep. So what are we doing today?"

"Since you got enough sleep I don't see why you can't come with me to work. Be ready to leave in 10 minutes". He finished his coffee and rinsed out the cup before placing it in the sink. He went into the other room to grab his stuff before leaving.

While Ryan waited for Horatio he went over and cleaned his plate and both his and Horatio's coffee cups. By the time he was finished he found that Horatio was waiting for him.

"Now you could have left that for me when I got home".

Ryan looks slightly embarrassed but said "Well, It's the least I could do while I am staying here".

"I agree, but cleaning the bathroom and kitchen until they were spotless is something you shouldn't feel the need to do. I want you to relax while you are here, not be my maid. Now shall we get going?" Horatio smiled as they went out to the car.

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They arrived at work and found Eric and Calleigh going over some evidence. Eric looked up and thought that Ryan was looking better these days "Hey Ryan, it is good to see you back. You are certainly looking better".

"Thanks Eric, I'm certainly feeling better these days. So what are you and Calleigh working on?"

For a second Eric thought Ryan sounded like he always did. He was always curious about everyone's cases; always wanting to help out where ever he could. "Well, this is an interesting case you would probably be interested in. It involves a set of twins, but the part that we are having trouble with is the DNA found on the weapon and at the scene of the crime. It belongs to both of the twins but there is no way that this was a suicide/murder case".

"So you have a third part involved then, but you must have come across cases like these before?"

"We have, but there is just something about this one that doesn't make sense. We have been through all of the evidence and the room where the bodies were found and the only DNA that was found belonged to the two victims. Whoever did this was very good about covering their tracks".

Ryan looked at some of the evidence for a minute thinking hard about the case. He had no recollection of past cases, but he still felt his knack for figuring out puzzles was still there. "Hey, have you considered the idea of a third sibling having something to do with the murders. Is there any possibility that the two victims are not twins, but actually part of a set of triplets?"

Eric was amazed at how quickly Ryan thought of this. He actually had already come up with the idea earlier, but it had taken him a whole day to even consider triplets. He and everyone else had been asked by Horatio too seek Ryan's advice on cases as a way to exercise his mind. Eric thought it was a good idea, but he thought it would take Ryan more time to come with something. "Hey, I never thought of that. I'll look into it and let you know what I find".

Ryan was hoping to go one step further, "Actually if Horatio doesn't mind I would love to help you on this?"

Horatio had been listening to the conversation between his two CSI and spoke up, "Sorry Mr. Wolfe, but I have other plans for you today. You can check back with Eric later to find out how the case is going".

"Sure H", he looked back at Eric "I'll see you later Eric". Ryan left the room with Horatio.

As Ryan followed Horatio out to the parking lot they were stopped by a loud commotions going on at the front door. As Ryan looked over he saw that someone was being brought in by some police officers. He saw that the person was in handcuffs and could only assume they were being brought it for something associated with a crime. The officers were having trouble with the man and several other officers were going over to help.

As the assistance arrived, this only caused the guy to become more violent. Horatio looked back at Ryan. "Ryan, I want you to wait here. I am going to go over to see if they need any help".

Ryan watched Horatio go over to help, but was suddenly surprised by the guys reaction. Out of nowhere he knocked several of the officers out of the way and took off running. Ryan had no time to do anything as the man headed right for where he was standing. He heard Horatio shout for him to move out of the way but he just stood there and froze. He didn't want on interfere with this guy but he also could not find the ability to move out of the way. Before he knew it the guy had run past him knocking him into the wall rather hard. Ryan was a little shocked when Horatio came rushing over to him.

"Ryan, are you hurt", Horatio helped him up and was busy checking him over.

"I'm fine Horatio, just a little stunned that's all. I'm sorry if I caused him to get away".

"He didn't get away; they were able to catch him". He gestured to his left so that Ryan could see the guy had been tackled to the ground by several other people. "Do you still feel like going out on a case today?" After seeing Ryan freeze he had to wonder if this was a good idea. Even though Ryan's instincts for the job appeared to be intact, he was worried that he was not emotionally ready to come back to work. He would have to keep an eye on this.

Ryan brushed off some invisible dirt off his clothes before responding to Horatio, "Yes, I'm ready. Let's go".

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	20. Chapter 20

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Ryan spent the next two weeks following Horatio around and was actually enjoying himself. He could definitely see himself doing this every day and was excited at the prospect of doing a case on his own. Horatio thought he was ready to work on a case by himself and he was all for the idea. He had recently moved back to his place since he had not had any nightmares in the last week and a half. Dr. Felton approved of his choice to go home and had also approved more hours that he could work in the lab. He was still only working part time, but at least he was allowed to work a case mostly on his own.

This was fine with him. It would give him a chance to show everyone that he belonged there. He didn't know why he felt the need to prove this to anyone, but he had been thinking about it a lot lately. Many nights before falling asleep he had thought about work and wondered if he had enjoyed it this much before. The only reason he kept asking himself this was the people he was working with. Upon his return to work he could tell that no one knew anything about him and therefore didn't know how to act around him. His thoughts always went back to wondering what he'd been like before and was it the reason why no one knew much about him? Maybe he was not a very likable person, but he knew that no one would ever admit this to him. But if he was not a very nice person than why did everyone always want to hang out with him? All he could think was that perhaps they were acting this way because they felt guilty, which is funny because the doctor had thought that this was the very thing that caused his memory loss. Guilt was a powerful thing.

He arrived at work early today since this was his first day working on his own; well mostly on his own. No one ever really worked a case by themselves around here.

He had hardly slept last night and felt like it was the first day of school. As he walked in several people smiled, waved and said hello to him. When he walked it to the lab he found Eric busy extracting some fingerprints from the handle of a hammer, but not too busy to look up and say "Hey buddy, ready for fun today?"

Ryan smiled and leaned up against the countertop, "I am very ready, but I guess I'll have to wait until a crime has been committed".

Eric laughed "Hey, I think a crime has already been committed. What are you wearing?"

"What are you talking about?"

Eric pointed to Ryan's ear.

"Oh, the earring, well I guess I let a certain red head from accounting talk me into it last night. Why, doesn't it look good?"

The look of despair on Ryan's face was too much for Eric and he started laughing. "Have you seen yourself in the mirror yet? That earring really makes your big ears stand out"

"Very funny Eric, I think it is quite becoming on the new me". As soon as he said it he felt a twinge of pain ring in his head causing him to wince at the pain.

"Hey, you alright there?" Eric had noticed the momentary pain that filled Ryan's face.

"Yeah, it's just a little headache. I didn't sleep well last night; I guess I was too excited about today". He unconsciously rubbed his head again before saying, "Hey, I won't keep you from your work so I'll see you later".

"Ok, we still on for tonight?" Eric had been planning a poker game at his place and was hoping Ryan was still coming.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world".

Ryan walked out the door and walked down to see Horatio. On his way he ran into Calleigh. "Hey Calleigh, I was just on my way to see H".

"Hi Ryan, your just the person I need. We just got a call. They found a body on the beach last night and they need us to get over there to take a look. You ready to go?"

Ryan nodded and followed Calleigh to the lab. There they picked up their cases and headed off to the crime scene.

It wasn't much of a case and by the end of the day they had figured it was an accidental drowning and the victim had been washed up on shore. Ryan had hoped for a better case, but at least Calleigh let him take the lead on it. He felt really good about it and by the time he left work he was happy, if only his nagging headache would go away.

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Ryan had offered to give Eric a ride home since his car was in the shop. They were both looking forward to the game later on and thought they better stop at the liquor store for a few refreshments. They both went inside and each took an aisle to get what they needed.

Eric was the first one at the register and was about to pay for his items when he heard a commotion coming from the front door. As he looked he saw that 3 guys had burst through the door and each of them had guns. One of the guys stayed at the door as a lookout while the other two advanced toward the register. Eric wanted to reach for his gun, but thought it might do more harm than good. He just stood there while one of the guys reached the counter. He saw that the other one was scoping out the rest of the place and he instantly thought of Ryan. He didn't know where he was and hoped that he saw what was going down and took cover.

The guy that came up the counter pointed his gun at the worker behind the register and started screaming "If you don't do anything stupid I may just let you live. Now put all of your money into a bag and hand it to me nice and slow".

The guy behind the counter looked at Eric for a second before doing as he was told. He knew Eric was a cop and had hoped he would do something, but realized that he may not have his gun on him and therefore could not do anything. He had seen Eric come in with another guy and had to wonder if maybe he was a cop as well, but never having seen him he didn't know. But he thought it was a good sign that the other guy was nowhere in sight.

-

Ryan had been looking at some imported beer when he heard the noise from the front. Instinct took over and he ducked out of sight while he assessed the situation. What he saw scared him.

He looked in one of the mirrors positioned in the corner of the store and saw that Eric was standing up at the register along with a man with a gun. Further evaluation of the store revealed at least 2 more guys were in there with them. Luckily there were no other customers that he could see.

He felt completely isolated, but was quickly reminded that he was not alone when he heard the guy shouting about money. He also became aware that one of the other guys was looking for people in the aisles and he had to think fast if he was to go undetected. He looked around and saw his opportunity. There was a display of wine coolers in the corner and it looked like there was just enough room for him to squeeze behind it. He waited a second and then made his move. As he wedged his way in he saw that there was an advantage to his position. He was completely out of sight of anyone in the front of the store. This now gave him time to think of what to do, but without a weapon he didn't think he had a chance. One of the conditions for returning to work was that he was not allowed to carry his gun since he was only part time. He quickly decided that his only hope was to try and take down one of the guys and take his gun away. He could then use it to make his way to the front. As he stood there he saw his opportunity to strike; it was now or never. He reached out for the guy who came around the corner and took him down without making any noise.

With gun in hand, he crept down and moved toward the front of the store. He still had 2 guys with guns and had to figure out how to handle it without anyone getting hurt. He decided to spring up and point the gun at the guy standing by the counter; as he appeared to be the leader. He hoped the other guy would lower his weapon and give up without a fight.

He saw his chance and rose up pointing the gun, "Miami Dade Police, throw your guns down and no one gets hurt".

What happened next was a blur to Ryan. He heard a gunshot and saw Eric go down. He dropped his gun and fell to his knees, his hands holding his head as an intense pounding started resonating everywhere.

-

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Ryan woke up in a darkened room; the only light was coming from a lamp. He sat up and looked around. He had no idea where he was and didn't remember how he had gotten here. He had been lying on a bed that was next to a side table. There was a desk and chair also in the room. His thoughts suddenly forgot the layout of the room and went straight to Eric.

He quickly got up from the bed and soon regretted the sudden movement. A terrible pain started pounding in his head and he fell back into the bed holding his head and trying very hard not to vomit. He nearly jumped up again when he heard a voice.

"Ryan, take it easy. You should lie back down while I go and get someone".

As Ryan listened to the voice he realized that it belonged to Calleigh. He looked around and saw that she must have been dozing in the chair that was in the darkest corner of the room. "Calleigh, where's Eric, I need to see him". He stood up and this time he managed to stand without falling back.

Calleigh was at Ryan's side in a flash. "Ryan, please sit down. You need to calm down".

"Calleigh, I can't calm down. Eric is dead and it's my fault isn't it?"

Ryan was starting to panic and Calleigh knew she needed to tell him something, "Ryan, Eric is fine. He's not dead. You're the one we've been worried about".

"What, he's alive, but how. I saw him get shot. He must be hurt then, please I need to see him".

"Eric wasn't shot Ryan. You can see him in a few minutes but in the meantime I need you to sit back down". She didn't like how he was acting and by the look on his face he didn't look good either.

Ryan used his hands to feel his way down to the bed. He couldn't quite believe what he was told. Eric was alright. But he was sure his reaction to the situation had caused more harm than good and that once again someone died as a result. This was too much for him to process. His head started pounding again and the pain was becoming too much to handle. He sank to the floor and saw the room go completely dark.

-

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3 days later Ryan woke up in a brightly lit room. He was lying in a bed with an IV hooked to his arm. He checked himself over and thought he must be the luckiest guy around. There didn't seem to be anything wrong with him so he could only attribute his escape from the bus without a scratch as luck. He was just about to get up when the door to his room opened. He saw someone who could only be the doctor come through the door.

"Ah I see that you are finally awake. How are you feeling?"

"I feel pretty good actually. Are you my doctor? Can I ask you why I'm here when there doesn't appear to be anything wrong with me?"

"Ryan, do you know who I am?"

"No, I can't say I do. I've never seen you before now".

"What do you remember before waking up in this room?"

"I remember that I was riding the bus and there were some guys making trouble on it, but I thought we crashed. It must not have been that bad if I came out of it without a scratch".

"I think you should rest for now Ryan, but to answer your question, yes I am your doctor. My name is Dr. Felton".

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	21. Chapter 21

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There was a flood of activity that came through the small room where Ryan was staying. He really didn't know what all the fuss was about, but apparently there was more to the story than he was being told about. The one thing that he didn't understand was why they insisted on keeping him here when there was nothing wrong with him. He also wondered why no one was here to visit him or why his room didn't have the usual get well cards and balloons that usually accompany someone in the hospital. Did his coworkers and friends really think this little of him to not be able to take the time to show a little compassion?

He decided the next person who walked into the room was not going to be allowed to leave before telling him what he wanted to know or he was walking out of here on his own. He may have been able to handle more time in the room had there been something for him to do. There was no TV in the room and there was nothing to read except for a few romance and spy novels; both of which he hated. But even if there had been something he liked he had a headache that had not seemed go away since waking up, but luckily it had not gotten any worse either.

One thing he was grateful for was that his IV had finally been removed. This allowed him to move about the room more freely. When he went into the bathroom and took a look at himself in the mirror, he was kind of shocked by what he saw. For some reason he looked different from the last time he saw himself. Perhaps the reason for this was the lighting in the room since this could make his hair look longer and his skin look darker. It may even be the reason why his face looked thinner, but the light could not be to blame for the earring he now saw in his left ear. Did someone play a practical joke on him while he was sleeping and pierce his ear? If this was the case, someone was going to be in major trouble when he was let out of this place.

Another hour went by before someone came into the room, but it was only someone bringing him something to eat. That was it, he was leaving. He went into the closet and found some clothes inside. They didn't look like his usual clothes, but they were his size. Perhaps someone just went out and bought some new items for him to wear home.

Once dressed he slowly opened the door, peaking out in the hallway looking both ways. Not seeing anyone he walked out of the room and down the hall to the door marked "Stairs". He didn't want anyone to see him leaving for fear of keeping him here.

Once he was outside he looked in his pocket and found that he had his wallet. He looked inside and was happy to see he had just enough cash for a taxi ride home. He was also happy to find his keys in another pocket. At least making it home was going to be an easy task to complete.

As soon as he was able to flag down a taxi he hopped inside and looked at the driver, "Yeah, I need to go to 4765 Templar Avenue".

The driver started the meter and said "Sure thing pal, so were you here visiting someone?"

"What,,,, oh yeah the hospital. I was here to visit a friend". Ryan leaned back into the seat, anxious to get home.

"Good news I hope".

"Huh, excuse me?"

"Your friend, I hope whatever they are here for has some good news attached to it. I really hate hospitals since they can be filled with bad news".

"Oh yeah, it was good news. They were released today". He didn't really feel like talking to the guy and hoped his questions were done now.

The driver obviously had other ideas "Well at least it looks like a nice enough day to get out of such a horrible place. After that storm we had the other day I thought today would be really hot and humid; glad I was wrong".

Ryan just nodded without saying anything. He thought that if he didn't play along the driver would give up on him and leave him alone. But his wish was not going to be granted. He just rolled his eyes as the driver started up again.

"So, have you lived in the area long? I'm thinking of moving closer to work and haven't made my mind up as to the best place to live. I live in an apartment, but my lease is up at the end of August so that only gives me 2 weeks to decide what to do. Do you know if there are any nice places around here with openings?"

Ryan was only half listening, but as soon as he heard the guy mention that the end of August was in 2 weeks he became confused. "What did you say about the end of August?"

"I was just saying that my lease is up then".

"No, you said something about the end of August being in 2 weeks. I don't get it. It's only June".

"Sorry pal, I don't know where you've been but it's the middle of August". The driver eyed Ryan in his rearview mirror as he suddenly became suspicious. If his passenger didn't know the month, maybe there was something wrong with him.

Ryan didn't say anymore to the guy, but noticed the silence right away. He also couldn't help but notice the guy kept looking at him in the rearview mirror. He first thought was to get home and figure out what was going on. Had he been in the hospital longer than he thought? That would explain why he didn't appear to have any injuries after the bus accident.

Soon he was in front of his condo. He paid he driver and got out of the cab. If he didn't know better the driver was happy to be rid of him. That was fine with him. He just wanted to get home and now he was here. He went toward the building and thought he better check his mailbox. He removed quite a bit of mail from the box and had to wonder how long it had been piling up. Didn't anyone think to have his mail stopped while he was in the hospital? He tucked the bundle under his arm without looking at it and walked toward his front door. Once inside he went up to the bathroom to grab some Advil for his headache. As he walked through his place he noticed some things had been moved, but other than that everything appeared to be cleaned. Maybe someone had come in to clean it and just moved some things around. He was ok with that.

When he opened the medicine cabinet he found something that didn't look familiar. It was a prescription bottle. He picked it up and looked at it to see whose name was on it; perhaps someone just left it here by mistake. What he saw printed on the label confused him. The bottle had his name on it and it was a prescription for "Fluoxetine". The bottle said to take one capsule in the morning to help lighten the mood of the day. He didn't have a prescription like this so why was it in his cabinet with his name on it. When he turned the bottle around to see the date it was filled he almost dropped it. The date on the bottle said August 9th. He had to take a seat on the toilet as this was too much to take in while standing up. None of this made any sense. First the taxi driver says it is the middle of August and now he had an unknown bottle of pills confirming the date. He got up and went into his room to make a call.

As he entered the room he saw that things had been moved in here as well. He also noticed a pile of dirty clothes in the hamper that he didn't recognize. What the hell was going on? He picked up his phone and called the only person he could think of, Alexx.

"Hey Alexx, I'm not sure what is going on, but I think I may be losing my mind".

"Hey baby, what's wrong. I was planning on coming to see you soon". Alexx didn't like the way Ryan's voice had sounded.

"I don't know what's wrong, but do you think you can come over now?'

"Sure baby, I can be at the hospital in 20 minutes and then we can talk ok?"

"I'm not at the hospital, I'm at home Alexx".

The concern in Alexx's voice suddenly became apparent as she said, "They let you out? I thought they were going to keep you for at least another day. I want you to stay right where you are, I'm on my way".

This made Ryan feel a little better just knowing that she may be able to provide answers to the questions forming in his head. He put his phone down and sat on the bed to wait. He really wasn't feeling very good at the moment and he suddenly leapt from the bed and ran to the bathroom. He reached the toilet just in time to vomit in it. He also felt like he could pass out, but managed to rid his mind of the dizzy feeling he was experiencing. He decided to stay right put on the bathroom floor until Alexx got here; just in case he got sick again.

-

Alexx had not been off the phone with Ryan for more than a few seconds before placing a call to Horatio. "Horatio, I just got off the phone with Ryan and we have a problem. He checked himself out of the hospital and is at home now. He called me to tell me he thought he was losing his mind. I'm worried about him Horatio. I'm on my way over to his place right now".

Once he sensed Alexx was done on the phone he replied to her by saying, "I'll meet you there".

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	22. Chapter 22

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When Alexx arrived at Ryan's condo she was frustrated when he didn't answer his door right away. She tried the door bell, tried knocking and even looked in the window, but there was no sign of him. She wondered if he took off after talking to her on the phone. As she stood there thinking of her next move Horatio arrived.

"Alexx, why are you out here, did Ryan leave?"

"I don't know, he's not answering the door. Where do you think he could be?"

"I'm not going to wait to find out". He took a set of keys from his pocket and used one of them on the front door. Ryan had given him a key for emergencies and as far as Horatio was concerned this situation met the definition.

Horatio cautiously entered the condo with Alexx close behind. He didn't suspect anything bad, but it was just his nature when he was unsure of something. He had been here enough after Ryan's accident to know the layout quite well and he headed straight for Ryan's bedroom to see if he might be there. When he found the room empty he looked toward the bathroom and noticed the door was mostly closed. As he walked over he looked through the small opening "Alexx, I found him". He pushed opened the door to find Ryan lying on the floor next to the shower. He knelt down and put his hand on Ryan's forehead. "Ryan, can you hear me".

Ryan opened his eyes which instantly connected with the eyes of a very concerned Horatio. "H, what are you doing here; I thought Alexx was coming over".

As soon as she heard her name she moved in Ryan's line of sight. "I'm right here baby; I was worried about you so I called Horatio". She would have knelt down but there was not enough room in the bathroom for all 3 of them to be on the floor.

"Ryan, do you think you can stand up, I would like to get you in your bedroom so that Alexx can have a look at you".

"I think so". Ryan allowed Horatio to help him stand up but that was all the help he was willing to take at the moment, "I think I can handle the rest H". He moved away from Horatio and found his way to his bed where he sat down leaning up against the head board.

Horatio couldn't help but feel a little hurt by Ryan's sudden independence. He had gotten use to having the young man lean on him in the past month and a half since the accident and although he would never admit it he enjoyed it.

Alexx sat down on the bed in such a way that she was facing him "Can you tell me why you were on the floor?"

Ryan leaned back further into the pillows behind him before replying "I felt sick and ran to the bathroom to throw up. After that my head hurt so bad that the only thing that made it better was lying on the floor".

Alexx instinctively placed her hand on his forehead to feel if it was hot. She didn't notice anything "Well, I don't think you have a fever, but how are you feeling right now, do you have the same symptoms?"

"I feel better, but my head still hurts".

Alexx looked at Ryan's head for any signs of trauma to his head, "did you hit your head, is that why it hurts".

"No, I just remember waking up in the hospital and the pain was there, but it has gotten worse since then".

"I want you to lie down for a little bit while it talk to Horatio, ok baby". Alexx helped him stretch out on the bed and waited until he looked relaxed enough to close his eyes before going into the other room with Horatio.

-

"Horatio, what's going on? Just a few hours ago you called to tell me that Ryan had woken up and that the doctor wanted us to refrain from visiting until he had talked to him. Did he tell you anything more that what you told me?" Alexx had gotten the impression that someone was wrong if they were being asked to hold off a visit, but trusted Horatio. He would have told her if there was something to worry about.

"He told me that there were complications from the last incident and he needed to have time to evaluate his next move before we came to see him. He said that he may have gotten his memory back from before the bus crash, but he may have forgotten everything that happened after he woke up from the accident. Dr. Felton thought that Ryan was in a fragile state of mind and that was why he didn't want all of us descending upon him. It may have done more harm than good".

There was a stunned look on Alexx's face as she listened to Horatio. She had been told he had woken up, but the idea that he may have forgotten everything that happened to him in the last month and a half was something she did not expect. "Oh my poor baby. No wonder he is so confused. But how could Dr. Felton have allowed this to happen. He should have at least let one of us be there with him. We may have been able to prevent this.

"I'm going to call Dr. Felton to let him know where Ryan is. Perhaps he can come here and tend to Ryan".

Horatio took his cell phone out of his pocket as Alexx headed back to Ryan's bedroom.

-

As Alexx walked in the room she saw that Ryan's eyes were closed so she assumed he was sleeping. She walked as quietly as she could so she wouldn't wake him up. As soon as she sat in the recliner that was in his room she saw him shift his body and eventually sit up.

When Ryan realized that someone had sat down in his recliner he sat up to see who it was. He found that it was Alexx who had come in. "Hey Alexx, do you know what is going on with me? I am so confused right now".

Alexx didn't know how much she should say but decided to take a stab at it, "You said you thought you were losing your mind, what did you mean by that".

Ryan swung his legs over the side of the bed so that they were resting on the floor, "I woke up in the hospital and the last thing I remember was the bus accident, yet when I looked in the mirror I didn't recognize myself. Then I found out that it was actually about a month and a half after the accident. Was I in a coma after the accident? Is that why I didn't have any apparent injuries on me?"

"Oh honey, it's not that easy. Maybe you should get a little more rest before we talk about this". She really wished that Dr. Felton was here to handle this. When she had found out earlier that Ryan had woken up she was overjoyed, but after hearing what Horatio had told her in the hallway she didn't know what to say.

Ryan was frustrated, he needed to know what was happening "Tell me now Alexx, I feel like I'm going crazy. Did I imagine the bus accident?"

She knew he needed to know, but didn't want to make things worse by saying he wrong thing, "No, you didn't imagine it. About a month and a half ago you were in a pretty bad accident. You were taken the hospital with a broken arm and a head injury". She stopped since she didn't know if he should hear the rest.

"If that was the case then why didn't I wake up with a cast on my arm? When I woke up there as nothing wrong with me that I could tell. This doesn't make sense Alexx". Ryan put his head down, not sure what to say next.

Alexx got up and gently pushed him back down into the bed "you should rest right now. Dr. Felton is coming over here to talk to you". She was glad that Ryan didn't put up a fuss about resting. She went back and sat on the recliner watching him. He didn't say anything while she sat there and she was happy to see that he had finally fallen asleep. She couldn't imagine what was going through his head, but it was no wonder he was confused.

While Ryan slept Alexx got up to go and talk to Horatio. She found him sitting at the kitchen table staring outside the window. "Is Dr. Felton coming over?"

Horatio looked over at Alexx "Yes, he said that he would come over here as soon as he could get away, but in the meantime we were to make sure he stays put and to not tell him much". Horatio stopped, but continued a moment later with a hint of anger in his voice, "They didn't even know he was missing, what kind of hospital just lets their patients just walk out". He was feeling a little emotional over this whole thing and wasn't afraid to hide it from Alexx. When he had found out about Ryan's latest memory issues, he was blown away.

Alexx took a seat next to Horatio and the 2 of them sat there for a while in silence, neither of them knowing what to say or do until Dr. Felton arrived. At some point Alexx got up and made some ice tea for the both of them. They continued to just sit there and sip their tea until they heard a voice.

"Hey, what are you guys doing here?"

Alexx and Horatio both stood up and allowed Ryan to sit down. Alexx was the first to respond to his question, "We were just waiting for you to wake up. I made some ice tea, would you like some?"

"Sure, sounds good Alexx". Ryan took hold of the glass and took a sip before asking again, "Why were you waiting for me to wake up. Did I ask you over here or something?"

At Ryan's latest question, Horatio exchanged a worried look with Alexx. Was it possible that he had now forgotten the last couple of hours? Whatever was happening to Ryan was not good and he just hoped that Dr. Felton arrived soon. This was one situation he didn't know how to handle.

Alexx could tell that Horatio wasn't going to say anything so she took over the conversation with Ryan, "Does your head still hurt?"

"I don't think so, but I still feel pretty tired". Ryan took another sip of ice tea, "this is good Alexx; I sure wish I could make it like this". He stopped to think about what he just said and had to ask, "So you've obviously been here long enough to make some tea, but why. Did you guys bring me home because of a headache?"

"Not exactly" was all that Alexx could think to say. Luckily she didn't need to think of anything further to say as the door bell rang.

Ryan had an annoyed looked on his face as he heard the bell, "Now who could that be". He started to get up to answer the door but was stopped by Horatio.

"I'll get the door Ryan, you just stay here".

Ryan pushed off Horatio's offer "No, this is my place so I think I should be the one to get the door". He went over to the door and opened it. He saw a man that he did not recognize "can I help you".

Dr. Felton was surprised that Ryan had been the one to answer the door. He looked at the young man and thought that he looked like he was about to fall over any second. "I believe you're expecting me Mr. Wolfe?"

"Do I know you or something?"

"Horatio called me and told me that you had left the hospital and came home. He asked that I come and check on you".

Ryan was confused now, "When was I at the hospital. Are you a doctor?"

Dr. Felton was not expecting this from Ryan and needed to take charge. "I'm your doctor Ryan and I came here to check you over". He didn't wait to be let in; instead he walked inside and gently pushed Ryan inside.

"Hey, what's going on? There's nothing wrong with me". He didn't like being pushed into his own house by someone he didn't even know. He then thought of Horatio and Alexx and put it all together; or at least what his confused mind came up with. He looked over at Horatio, "Is this why you're here, to make sure some doctor checked me out. Would someone please tell me what is going on?" As soon as he said this, his head hurt so badly that he grabbed it with both hands and squeezed his eyes shut as if trying to rid himself of the pain.

Dr. Felton took hold of Ryan immediately and directed him over to the couch. "Sit down Ryan and let me have a look at you". He didn't get any complaints so it made things a lot easier. "Can you tell me where it hurts?"

"My head, it feels like there is a sledgehammer in there". He was reluctant to move his hands out of the way for the doctor to look into his eyes, but eventually gave in. As the light was shone into his eyes the pain became worse. He swatted the little flashlight out of the way while closing his eyes and turning his head around.

"Does the light hurt your eyes?"

"No, I just felt like knocking the light out of your hands, what do you think?"

The doctor didn't like how Ryan was acting. He took something out of his bag and turned to Ryan, "I am going to give you something for the pain".

Ryan looked at the doctor's hand and saw that he was holding a syringe. "Hey, I don't need that. Just give me some Advil and I should be good".

"No, this will work faster, trust me". The doctor prepared the medicine and then asked Alexx to help him with Ryan. As soon as he saw his chance he pushed the needle into Ryan's arm. It took only a matter of seconds before the medicine took effect. Ryan laid back into the couch and closed his eyes.

Horatio had been watching what was going on and was finally ready to step in and say something, "Is he all right? What did you give him?" He went over to the couch and checked on Ryan, grateful to see his chest slowly rising and falling with each breath.

"I gave him a mild sedative. I really need to get him back to the hospital to have him checked out. His behavior today has been wildly erratic and unpredictable. I would like to do some further tests on him".

"Do you have any idea what's wrong with him?"

"I'm not sure. When I saw him earlier I did a little research and thought that he was suffering from some form of post traumatic stress disorder associated with his accidents, but now I'm not so sure".

Horatio was intrigued by the doctor's first diagnosis "what made you think of that?"

"After talking to him and going over his accidents in detail it appears that his amnesia may be the result of the guilt he felt after each accident. I felt that he was feeling responsible for the accidents because of something he did. The scene at the liquor store also seemed to fit in with everything. From what I was told his intrusion into the robbery caused the store keeper to use that chance to use his gun. I think that maybe Ryan thought Eric was hurt as a result of something he did and this was too much for him to handle. But his behavior just now is what has me bothered. I am not an expert on PTSD, but I have a colleague who I think could help. In the meantime I would like to get him back to the hospital so that we can keep an eye on him".

Horatio agreed that Ryan needed to go back to the hospital, but he just hoped they kept a better eye on him that they did today. He went and packed a few things for Ryan before helping the doctor get Ryan to his car.

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The drive over the hospital was a quite one. Horatio had insisted on driving Ryan to the hospital while the doctor followed in his car. Alexx had gone with him in case he needed help with Ryan, but luckily he never woke up.

When they arrived at the hospital two orderlies were waiting to help them get Ryan back to his room. Horatio waited to talk to the doctor before sitting with Ryan. "I've placed a call with his father who is on his way here, but in the meantime I plan on sitting with him. What should I tell him when he wakes up?"

"We should keep any conversations to a minimum. I've already placed a call with my friend Dr. Kelger. He's driving up from Orlando to have a look at Ryan. I expect him here tomorrow, but before he gets here I have schedule a few tests to rule out any physical problems that may be causing his shift in behavior.

"Thank you doctor". Horatio left the doctor and headed to Ryan's room. Once there he took a seat and waited for Ryan to wake up.

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Horatio had sat with Ryan for the last 3 hours and was starting to fall asleep himself when he heard Ryan start to mumble. He was instantly awake and at his side. He could see that he was finally waking up. "Hey Ryan, good to have you back".

Ryan opened his eyes "What, where have I been?" He sat up as best he could and looked around to see that he was in a hospital room. "What happened Horatio, why am I here?"

"You weren't feeling so good so we brought you here".

"How long do I have to stay here, I feel fine".

The look on Ryan's face was becoming too much for Horatio. He had been through a lot with him in the last month and a half and was beginning to look at him like a father would a son. He only wanted the best for him. "They just want to do some tests on you and have another doctor from Orlando take a look at you". He really wish he knew what the young man could remember, it was hard to talk to him not knowing what he could talk about.

"What kind of tests. I thought I was good after the incident in the liquor store. Did I get hurt or something?"

Horatio was surprised with Ryan's statement. He wondered how many times his memory was going to change. He just hoped that Dr. Kelger could help. He feared for Ryan's sanity if these memory lapses were to continue.

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	23. Chapter 23

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Horatio sat with Ryan until they took him away for a CAT scan to check for any abnormalities. Once they were done with that test they had scheduled a few more. By the time they were finished Ryan was ready for some rest.

When Ryan was back in the room Horatio talked to him about anything and everything just to try and keep his mind off of the current situation. Horatio was glad for the distraction as well since it was hard to see Ryan look so vulnerable.

A few times during their conversation Ryan's mind would start to wonder off and when he would come back to the discussion it was like he had forgotten what they had talked about. This worried Horatio enough to mention it to the doctor; who in turn documented the information into Ryan's chart.

The rest of the night dragged on for Horatio. He was tired and wanted nothing more than to close his eyes, but he was afraid that if he did he would open his eyes to find Ryan gone. Ryan's state of mind was so unpredictable that he was a flight risk. The doctor wanted to put him on a locked ward when he first got to the hospital but Horatio was able to talk him out by telling him that he planned on staying the whole night.

At one point during the night Horatio did fall asleep. He remembered watching some infomercial and then all of a sudden he was looking out the window watching the sun rise. A moment of panic overtook him until he saw Ryan sleeping in the bed.

While Ryan slept he took the chance to go and find a cup of coffee. He told the nurse where he was going and asked if she would please keep an eye on his room. She said she would since she had to go and check on him anyway.

Horatio's only choice for coffee was from the vending machine on the first floor. It was too early for the cafeteria to be open so he really didn't have any choice. As he stood there sipping the hot liquid he noticed a familiar face enter through the visitors entrance and head toward the reception desk. He walked over to the desk, "Good Morning Brian, I figured you would be getting here later in the day".

Brian Wolfe had seen Horatio headed his way and shook his offered hand when he had reached the spot where he was standing. "Good Morning Horatio. I was able to get on an earlier flight. How is Ryan doing?"

"He's sleeping right now, but I can take you up to his room". He led Brian Wolfe to the elevators and then up to the 5th floor where Ryan's room was.

Horatio thanks the nurse who he had asked to keep an eye on Ryan and then went into the room with Brian.

Brian saw that Ryan was still asleep. He went over to the bed and looked at his son for a minute before turning back to Horatio, "Can we talk outside?"

Horatio led the way out of the room.

"So, what can you tell me about Ryan? He looks so different from the last time I saw him. Has this been going for some time now, or did it just start?"

Horatio had to think of where to start before he could reply to Brian, "Well it really started about 4 days ago. He had been making great progress since you left and he was just hanging out with a friend one night when it all started". Horatio went on to explain the details of the incident at the liquor store and everything that occurred after it. When he was finished he could see that Brian needed to sit down, "Maybe we should take a seat". Horatio saw that there was a small waiting room a few rooms down and decided to take Brian to one of the chairs.

He had been told a few things over the phone, but now having heard the whole story he was speechless. He took the seat Horatio had motioned to and sat there in silence; thinking of what to say. After a few minutes he stood back up, "I should probably go and sit with him so that he is not alone when he wakes up. Do you know when his doctor will be getting here?"

Horatio felt sorry for Brian. He knew this would be difficult for Ryan's father; heck it was difficult for him to handle and he was only Ryan's friend. "I was told to expect him sometime around 9".

Brian could see the affect this was having on Horatio, but the way he saw it was that he was here now and he should be the one to take care of Ryan. "I'm going to stay with him until the doctor arrives. You should probably head home; you look like you could use some sleep".

Horatio didn't want to leave, but knew it was not really his place to stay. Brian could and should take care of Ryan. "That sounds like a good idea. I'll come and check on him later".

"I'll let you know what I find out from the doctor". Brian walked back to Ryan's room while Horatio went in the direction of the parking ramp.

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Brian looked at his watch and saw that it was 8:30. He still had another 30 minutes before Ryan's doctor was expected so he used the time to think about his next move. After seeing his son, he knew that whatever he decided was his decision to make. Ryan's state of mind was too fragile to allow him to decide for himself. The only thing he could think of doing at the moment was bringing Ryan back home. That way he would be able to keep a closer eye on his son and make sure he got better; or at least receive the kind of treatment he would need if this condition were permanent.

Before the doctor arrived Brian noticed that Ryan was awake and staring at him. "Hey Ryan, how long have you been awake? Sorry I didn't notice you were awake earlier, I guess I was too deep in thought to notice".

"I've only been awake for a few minutes. I could tell you were thinking and I didn't want to interrupt you. When did you get here dad?"

Brian was so relieved that his son remembered him. Horatio had warned him that he may wake up and have had another memory lapse. He had to keep telling himself that just because he remembered his own father didn't mean he was all right. There may be other things he has forgotten, but he would not know unless he was asking. "I arrived this morning. I've just been sitting here waiting for you to wake up. I sent Horatio back home to get some sleep".

"Horatio was here, I don't remember seeing him".

This told Brian all he needed to know. If Ryan didn't remember Horatio sitting with him all night then he must be experiencing another memory lapse. "Yes, Horatio was here with you all night. So you're saying that you don't remember any of that?"

"The last time I saw him was last night, but I thought he went home. When did he come back? Is he here now?"

"I sent him home. He looked like he could use some sleep".

Ryan felt a sense of guilt at hearing that Horatio had been here the whole night, but he felt worse about the fact that he didn't remember it happening. Ever since he woke up his mind felt numb. He wasn't feeling quite himself; but that would probably explain where he was. "So dad, can you tell me why I am here again? I remember being here last night, but I just can't seem to remember anything else".

Brian was having a difficult time listening to his son. This would make it the third time he has had to go through something like this; except in this case he wasn't sure how much Ryan remembered and how much he didn't. But like all the other times he would do what was needed in order to ensure Ryan was all right. "I'm not sure. I haven't had a chance to talk to your doctor yet, but I have had some time to think about all of this". He stopped, not sure if he should say anything about his plans. Before he could continue the door opened and in walked Dr. Felton.

The doctor went directly over to Ryan "Good morning Ryan, how are we feeling this morning". He wasn't trying to ignore the other person in the room, but he wanted to talk to Ryan first.

"I'm feeling fine; can you tell me when I might get out of here and back to work?"

"All in due time, I promise, but in the meantime we still have to do some more tests". He then looked at the older gentleman in the room. He could only assume the man was Ryan's father. "So, you must be Brian Wolfe, I have heard much about you from both Ryan and Horatio". He extended his hand toward Brian.

Brian shook the doctor's hand and said "Yes, I'm Ryan's father. Did you say something about more tests? Does that mean that you still don't know what is wrong with him?"

The doctor had a look of uncertainty on his face and he was having a hard time concealing it, "We have already run some tests and have found nothing to explain what is going on, but there are a few more that we would like to run. I would also like to turn this case over to one of my colleagues from Orlando; he has had more experience with this type of thing. I am expecting him sometime today".

Brian felt a little hopeful at the doctor's words, "so you must have some kind of idea of what's wrong if you are calling in a specialist".

"I have one idea of what it might be, but I would really like someone else to check him out". He didn't really like saying anything until he was positive of the diagnosis.

Brian needed to know so he asked again "So what do you think is wrong with him".

Dr. Felton realized he needed to say more or Mr. Wolf would keep on asking, "I think he is suffering from post traumatic stress disorder. I think that he felt guilty because he was blaming himself for causing each of the accidents. I think that guilt has manifested itself in the only way it knows how, and that is to forget. But Mr. Wolfe, I need you to understand that this is only an educated guess. This is why I would like someone with more experience to take a look".

Brian had heard of PTSD, but only thought it was something that occurred with people who had come back from the war. "I don't understand. None of these accidents were his fault, so why would he forget everything as a result?"

Ryan had been quietly listening to all of this since this was the first time he had heard it, but he was starting to feel like they had forgotten that he was still in the room, "Hey, do either of you remember that I am in here and might want to know what is going on as well?"

Dr. Felton's gaze rested on Ryan, "I'm sorry Ryan; I didn't mean to exclude you from our conversation". He was about to continue when he his cell phone went off. He pulled it out of his jacket pocket and answered it. After speaking to the person on the other line he ended the call and placed it back into his pocket. He turned and faced the two men, "It looks like the other doctor I told you about has arrived. If the both of you will please excuse me, I need to speak with him and then I can bring him back here to talk with you".

Ryan watched as the doctor left the room. His attention than returned to his father, "Whatever the doctor has to tell me, I just hope he will let me out of here soon". He paused before continuing,  
"Were you going to say something else before the doctor came in earlier? It looked like you might have had more to say".

Brian was hoping his son has forgotten how their conversation had ended, but now he felt he had to say what was on his mind. "I was just saying that I had time to think the situation through and I came to one conclusion. I would like to take you back home with me. I don't know what kind of things happened after I left the first time, but apparently they didn't go very well. I need to make sure you get better and I can't do that from a distance. I am going to tell the doctor that I am going to take you to one of my doctors back home". When he was done stating his plan, he felt relieved. He hadn't been sure how Ryan would react to this, but he had to remember he was doing what was best for his son.

Ryan was a little shocked by his father's idea and didn't like that he had made it sound so final "Hey, I think we should talk about this. I can take care of myself, so I don't see the need to go back home with you".

"Ryan, I don't want to argue about this. From what I have been told you have been having unpredictable lapses of memories so I don't see that you have much of a choice. I can't have you stay here and still be able to take care of you. You need to have someone look after you and make sure you stay safe. Now before you start protesting and saying your friends will be there to help, they are not your family, I am". He knew he was being kind of harsh with Ryan, but he needed to make sure his words hit home with the boy.

As soon as he talked to this new doctor he was going to make plans to have Ryan moved back home. He didn't know how long the move would be, but if it took forever before Ryan was better, than it took forever.

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	24. Chapter 24

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After Brian had told his son about his plan to take him back home he refused to discuss it with him. He eventually regretted having told him about it so soon because now Ryan was not talking. He tried to make simple conversation with him, but there was no getting through to him. After talking to one of the nurses he went in search of the cafeteria for a bite to eat. He hoped some time alone would bring his son around to his way of thinking.

As Brian sat at one of the cafeteria tables sipping coffee he noticed someone who looked like a doctor walking toward his table. He had never seen the man, but one thing was certain, he seemed to be looking for someone.

"Hi, are you Brian Wolfe by any chance?"

"I am. Are you one of my son's doctor's?"

The man held out his hand as he said "I'm Dr. Kelger. I believe you were expecting me".

Brian stood up and shook the doctor's hand. "Yes, Dr. Felton said you had arrived".

"Please sit down and finish your coffee. I hope you don't mind, but I was hoping to talk to you about Ryan before I actually went and saw him. I have been reviewing his case and I needed to get a few more facts about his first accident".

Brian shifted in his seat feeling somewhat uncomfortable. Whenever he was asked about the accident it always brought unwanted memories that he was hoping to just forget. "What kind of things do you want to know, I think I told Dr. Felton all that I knew?"

"I have all the information I need about the accident, but I am looking to find out about his life afterwards. I need to know what he was like and what kind of things you did for him. I feel the days, months and in this case years following the accident are crucial to his recover".

Brian was confused, what would the days after the accident tell anyone, "I don't understand why you would want to know about that. I brought him home from the hospital and he never remembered anything after that. There's really nothing more to tell".

Dr. Kelger could sense he hit a raw nerve with Brian, but he wasn't here for him, he was here for Ryan, "Yes, I have read that he never regained his memory and had to start all over again, but I'm looking for more specific details. Did Ryan ever see anyone and talk about his experience after the crash?"

Brian suddenly realized where this was going and didn't like the accusation he was hearing in the doctor's words, "No he didn't see anyone. What good would that have done? How could he talk about something he didn't even remember?" His voice was getting louder as he grew more irritated, "I don't see what any of this has to do with his current problem".

"I'm sorry Mr. Wolfe; I was not trying to insinuate anything. I'm sure you did everything you could at the time". As he said this he realized it was the wrong thing to say. He watched as Brian stood up from the table and tower over him.

"Look, I did the best I could for Ryan, so I don't appreciate you coming in here and accusing me of not taking care of my son".

"Please sit down Mr. Wolfe; I'm not accusing you of anything". He could tell this was not going well. "I assure you I am just trying to find out details about his life after the crash".

Brian didn't know why he was suddenly acting this way. He knew the doctor was only doing his job, but for some reason it felt like the questions were blaming him for Ryan's condition. "Listen Dr. Kelger, I appreciate your concern for my son's well being, but I must tell you that I plan on taking him back home with me where I can take care of him".

Dr. Kelger was afraid he was going to say something like this, "I think your actions might do more harm than good for your son".

"As I said before, I appreciate your concern, but Ryan needs to be with his family right now. If you will please excuse me, I am going to go check on Ryan". Brian stood up and simply walked away from the doctor, who was still sitting at the table with a stunned looked on his face.

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Brian was angry, but he didn't want to show it in front of Ryan. He took a moment to regain his composure before entering his room. When he walked in he found that Ryan had his eyes closed while a nurse was in his room typing something into his patient file. As soon as the nurse looked up she quickly finished up what she was doing and left the two men alone.

Brian took a seat and waited for his son to wake up. While he sat there he called home and started making arrangement for Ryan's return home. He was making good progress when a sudden scream emanated from Ryan's direction. He dropped his phone and ran over to his side. "Ryan, it's ok, you're safe. I'm here now".

At the sound of his father's voice Ryan stopped screaming and opened his eyes. "Daddy, where am I?" Is mommy here too?"

Hearing his son call him daddy and asking for his mother came as a bit of a shock to Brian. He looked closely at his son's face and saw something he had not seen in awhile; the face of a scared and innocent little boy. It only took him a moment to realize where Ryan's mind was at the moment. He was back at the hospital after waking up from his first crash. "No Ryan, your mother is not here".

The look on Ryan's face was too much for his father to take. Why was this happening to him and his family again? He knew his son needed to be taken care of, but did he really have the strength to do this again. He had to look away from his sons gaze as it became too much for him to handle. His son was waiting for him to say something but he had nothing to say.

Brian's head was still turned away from Ryan when he felt a shaking sensation. He tried to ignore it but it persisted until he knew he had to find out what was causing it. As he turned around he suddenly saw Dr. Felton standing over him. He realized the shaking he felt was the doctor's hand on his shoulder trying to shake him awake. He quickly looked over at Ryan and saw that he was still sleeping. What the hell was going on? "Dr. Felton, I'm sorry, I didn't hear you come in".

"No, I should be the one who is sorry for having to wake you up. It looked like you were having an unpleasant dream so I thought it was best to wake you up before you woke Ryan up".

Brian realized it was only a dream and Ryan had not called him daddy. He felt relieved, but at the same time confused. He didn't know what his mind was trying to tell him. "Yeah, I guess I was dreaming. I don't even remember falling asleep".

"Well, you have been through a lot lately. Do you think I could talk to you about your son?"

Brian could tell by the look on the doctor's face that he knew what his plans were. "So, you must have talked to that other doctor than. Like I told him, Ryan needs to be with his family".

"I understand the need for family, but I am not sure you have thought this all the way through. Ryan needs to have the proper therapy if he is to ever get his life back. He needs to deal with the incidents of the past if he is to move forward and by going home he will not be able to do that properly".

"He'll get that back home. Don't you think I want my son to get better? The other doctor made it sound like Ryan's condition was all my doing. I did the best I could for him and he got better. He was eventually able to get one with his life and make something of himself. Hell, look where he ended up. If he was not all right would he have been able to be a cop; I think not". Brian was starting to feel defensive again and was having a hard time keeping his tone of voice down.

"Look Mr. Wolfe, I didn't come in here to upset you. I don't think Dr. Kelger meant to accuse you of anything either. He is just concerned for your son. He told me that had you taken Ryan to see someone and talk out the issues of guilt he was feeling; then perhaps he would not have dealt with the guilt he felt from the last accident in the same way".

Brian was confused, "What are you talking about. What would he have to feel guilty about? He didn't cause the accident. He didn't cause the bus one either".

Dr. Felton realized he needed to tell Brian something about the accident but wasn't sure how he was going to take it "He feels guilty because of something he did right before the car crashed. The guilt he felt led to his amnesia. His mind was trying to forget the events of the accident, but instead he forgot everything. It was the same with the bus accident. He stood up and tried to confront a couple of thugs with a gun on the bus and this caused one of the men to shoot the driver which cause the driver to crash the bus. He felt so guilty about this that his mind chose to forget".

Brian wondered why he gave such details about the bus accident but not the one that took his family. "What event happened in the car that would do this to Ryan? He was just a little boy".

Dr. Felton wasn't surprised that Brian had noticed his omission. "From what Ryan told me the boys were getting pretty rough in the back seat and their mother turned around to try and get them to stop. It was at that moment that the car crashed".

This was new information to Brian, but it didn't change anything for him. He didn't know what the doctor thought he would think or do once he knew this, but he wasn't going to break down. "Where did you get this information from?"

"I took Ryan back to the day of the first accident using a form of hypnosis. I also did this the day of the bus accident. With the information I was able to put a theory together that I feel is accurate".

"So what caused this latest incident then?"

"He thought he saw his friend shot in the liquor store and that his intrusion was the cause of it. All of this supports my theory; which is something that led Dr. Kelger and I to think it was a form or post traumatic stress. But with this latest incident his mind is having a hard time processing his memories. It is like his memories were scattered around and he is picking them back up in no particular order".

As Brian processed the information he was starting to understand things more clearly. He also knew that this was more than he could handle and that perhaps Ryan did need to see someone in order to get through this ordeal. "I just want Ryan to get better, but I don't know how I can do that with him being here. I can't stay here so my only choice is to take him back with me".

Dr. Felton saw the defeated look on Brian's face. "I understand your feelings, but maybe we need to ask Ryan what his choice is".

Brian looked at his still sleeping son, "Yes, I owe him that much. He deserves to be part of the decision. I'll talk to him when he wakes up".

"Thank you Mr. Wolfe. I am glad that you are willing to think about it. I'll let know Dr. Kelger know what is going on. He wants to come and talk to you again".

Brian watched the doctor walk out of the room and stared at the closed door for a moment before turning his attention to his sleeping son. He looked closely at his son's face and thought that his son didn't deserve any of this. He wished he had known that Ryan had blamed himself for the car crash; then perhaps he could have done something to make sure he knew it was not his fault.

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Ryan had been awake when Dr. Felton was talking to his father. He didn't want them to know he was listening so he pretended to be asleep. He also chose to pretend after the doctor left because he didn't know what his father was thinking. He wondered if his father blamed him for his wife and son's death. It was time to find out, "Hi dad".

Brian's posture straightened up as he heard his son, "Ryan, your awake. How are you feeling?"

Over the next hour Brian and his son talked. He was happy to learn that his son's memory seems very intact at the moment and his mind was clear. When they were done it was decided that Ryan would stay back here in Miami and be seen by Dr. Kelger. It was also decided that Ryan's stepmother would come out to stay with him until he got better, but both agreed that is nothing changed Ryan would move back home permanently.

Per Ryan's request Brian called Horatio and told him what the decision was. Horatio indicated that they would keep his job opened for him, but he would not be returning to work for awhile. This made Brian happy to know that Ryan would still have something to go back to once he was better. He also had Dr. Kelger paged so that he could talk to him and discuss the treatment he had planned for his son.

Dr. Kelger arrived in Ryan's room shortly after being paged and the three of them talked for several hours about the course of treatment he had in mind. Brian felt better after listening to the doctor and he knew that this was the best thing for Ryan.

Dr. Kelger said that he would like to release Ryan as long as there was someone staying with him and that he would like to start his sessions tomorrow. He also told Ryan to start a journal and write down everything he was feeling and thinking, as this will be helpful when they met each day.

Since Brian agreed to stay with son until his wife arrived, Ryan was released by the end of the day.

From the time they arrived at his condo to the time of his first session, Ryan's memory had changed four times that Brian could tell. The changes were slight, but they were definitely noticeable. He could also tell this was taking a toll on his son. He just hoped Dr. Kelger could do something for him. If he couldn't he didn't see how his son could lead a normal life.

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	25. Chapter 25

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Ryan's first session with Dr. Kelger was scheduled for 2 hours after lunch. The doctor had asked that Brian also attend so that he could provide a sense of security for his son. From what he was told Ryan's memories were playing tricks on him ever since he returned home from the hospital and there was no telling what he would be like at the beginning of the session.

As soon as they arrived at Dr. Kelger's temporary residence they found out that he was staying with Dr. Felton. The house where the sessions were to occur was a nice two story home set in what could only be called an all American neighborhood. It also showed that the doctor had done well for himself.

Dr. Kelger was at the front door to greet them, "Hello, please come in. I thought we would have our first session in the back yard". He led the two men through the richly furnished home into the back where it looked equally impressive. "Please take a seat by the garden. I hope you like ice tea". He poured each one a glass and handed it to them after they sat down.

Brian was impressed by his surrounding, but had to wonder how this would help his son, "this is a nice place that Dr. Felton has, but it seems like an unusual place to hold your sessions".

Dr. Kelger considered Brian's impression and replied "I thought the first time we met we should do it in a nice and relaxed atmosphere. I assure you Mr. Wolfe; your son will have the best treatment regardless of where his is". He took a sip of tea before continuing "so, you're probably wondering why I wanted both of you to attend. Well the reason is simple; I just wanted to have you both listen to each other on what you remember after the first accident". He turned to Ryan, "Now Ryan, I understand your memory is not that clear at the moment, but I just want you to listen to your father first. I am hoping by listening to him that your own memories of what happen will begin to emerge; with a little help of course".

Brian didn't know what the doctor was talking about at first, but as soon as he heard him mention the word 'help' he had an idea, "are you going to put him under again like Dr. Felton did?"

Dr. Kelger nodded "Yes, I would like to try that again, but this time I would like to video tape it. I am hoping that when Ryan watches it back at a future session he can see your reaction and also hear what he was able to remember at the time. I have tried this with other patients and have had great success. So are you both up to this?"

Ryan was quiet up until now. He was having a hard time figuring out much of what the doctor was telling him, but for some reason the doctor had a calming presence and he trusted him. "Yes doctor, I am ready".

Brian nodded his agreement as well.

The next two hours went by and before they knew it they were done. Brian had to admit to himself that this doctor knew what he was doing. By the end of the session Ryan was acting more like himself and it could only be attributed to what they talked about. Dr. Kelger had asked Ryan for his journal and they went over everything that was written inside. He had to admit he was surprised by the amount of information that his son had recorded in one day's time. He was also surprised by the content of the information as well. He wondered why he never thought to do this for his son before, but as Dr. Kelger pointed out several times in the last two hours; there was no point in dwelling in past regrets. One must look toward the future while remaining firmly planted in the present.

Ryan and his father thanked Dr. Kelger before leaving.

Before heading home they made their way to airport and picked up Elana Wolfe; Ryan's stepmother.

The three of them spent the rest of the night acting like a family. Brian hated to leave in the morning, but his business would suffer if he wasn't there. He was just grateful to Elana for being able to come here and stay with Ryan while he saw Dr. Kelger. He knew she would call him each day and keep him informed on Ryan's progress.

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The start of the next day saw the departure of Brian Wolfe. He had a taxi take him to the airport since he didn't want to have Elana try and maneuver her way through Miami on her first day here. He also didn't think Ryan was up for the drive since he could not rely on him remembering his way home.

After his father left Ryan told Elana he was still tired and headed back to his room for some more sleep.

Elana took this time to look through the kitchen for items they would need to pick up from the store. She was in the middle of making her final list when she heard Ryan moving about in the other room. Before she could go and see exactly where he was, she heard the shower start up in the bathroom.

By the time Ryan came out of the bathroom it was time for lunch. Elana was relaxing on the couch when he walked into the living room, "Hi Ryan, are you feeling more rested?"

"Yeah, I think I am. So what do you want to do today?"

"Well for starters I thought we should go to the store and get some food. Your kitchen doesn't have much for me to work with. I made a list of things that you need, but I thought you could take a look at it to see if there was anything else to add". She got up from the couch and walked over to the kitchen table where the list was. "Here, you can take a look at it in the car. I thought we could grab a bite to eat before we headed to the store; I'm starving".

Ryan thought the idea of food sounded like an excellent idea and let Elana know it "Sounds good".

The next three hours were spent at one of the restaurants that Elana liked and then at the grocery store that she had shopped at last time she was in town. They spent a lot of time at the store going up and down each isle looking for everything on Elana's list. Ryan had also added a few items to the list, but mostly the stuff he picked out was stuff he saw after arriving at the store.

After they had gotten home and put away their purchases Elana suggested they go for a walk. As they walked they talked about everything. Ryan was really enjoying his time with his stepmother, but he had to admit to her that the only thing he remembered about her was when she came to visit with his father before. She told him that it was all right that he couldn't remember. She was just glad that he remembered something.

The rest of the evening was very low key and by the time Elana crawled into bed, she was exhausted. She knew that the day had also worn out Ryan since he had gone to bed 30 minutes earlier. Before turning out her light she called Brian and told him all about her day.

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Over the course of the next week, Elana got a chance to see what Brian had been telling her about Ryan's memory. Every morning he seemed to be a different person. She never knew what he would have forgotten from day to day. Sometimes his memory changed several times during the day and she could see why he couldn't be left alone. Many nights she talked to Brian over the phone about what they would do with Ryan if his memory never stabilized. She had already accepted the idea of having him come back home to live with them, but she also knew he would miss Miami. If there was one thing that was the same, it was his love for this city and the job he had. He had told her on many occasions that he couldn't wait to be allowed back to work, but she just couldn't see it happening.

Another thing she had to wonder about was these sessions that Ryan was attending. She usually just dropped him off and then would pick him up when he was done so she never knew what they talked about. Since she never saw any obvious changes, she wasn't sure how effective Ryan's time with the doctor was. She had asked Brian about the first and only one that he had attended one of Ryan's sessions and he told her he was confident in Dr. Kelger's abilities, but he honestly could not say too much about the doctor since he only sat in one time.

Today when she picked Ryan up, she could see that he was upset about something, but when she asked him about it he just withdrew from the conversation. She had not seen this side of him yet and it worried her. The rest of the night was the same so she had decided to confront the doctor on what they had talked about.

Before she went to bed, she called Brian just as she did every night and she was happy to hear him say she was doing the right thing. But he also had to remind her that it had only been a week and they needed to give Dr. Kelger more time, but if they didn't see any kind of improvement soon they would make the decision to bring him home.

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The next day when they drove to see Dr. Kelger, Ryan was surprised to find out that Elana wanted to come in and talk to the doctor. As usual he had forgotten things and whatever had been bothering him yesterday didn't seem to be bothering him today. She didn't know if he had just forgotten it or if he had worked through whatever was eating at him.

Ryan introduced his step mom to Dr. Kelger and the three of them walked to the back porch to talk. Elana could tell that the doctor was surprised by her visit, but after they had a chance to talk when Ryan left the room he understood why. She had asked him what had occurred the day before and told him how Ryan had acted. She thought it was odd that the doctor didn't seem surprised, but after he told her what they had done she understood it a little bit better. She remembered Brian telling her about the videotaped session and that Ryan was going to get to view it at a later time, but she was shocked to learn that yesterday was the third time he had watched it and each time there were moments that seemed new to him even though he had just seen it the day before. This would be tough on anyone to go through, but the doctor assured her it was part of his treatment; something which he had done before and with great success.

When Ryan's session was done Elana had a better feeling about the doctor, but still had her doubts about some of the methods he was using. She could also tell that Ryan seems to be a little different after they had left. It was almost as if he enjoyed having her there; which gave her a good feeling. It had always been difficult to act like his mom when he was growing up. She never wanted to replace his real mother, but it wasn't hard when he couldn't remember her.

On their way home Elana decided to stop at the bank to take care of something. Ryan was feeling a little tired so he decided to stay in the car while she ran in. She was glad that they had a branch of her bank here in town; but her visit was not to obtain money from her account, rather it was to clear up an incorrect charge she had gotten the week before.

As Elana entered the bank she was happy to see it was almost deserted; she didn't want to keep Ryan waiting. She went over the information desk and asked to speak to someone about her problem. She was directed to a set of chairs and asked to wait until someone was available. As she sat there watching the little bit of activity that was occurring she found herself exclusively watching a group of 3 men who had walked in and were now at the one counter. They were starting to hover around the counter in a way that was making her suspicious.

The 3 men suddenly split up as one went over to the door; one went over to the information desk and one stayed at the counter. For some reason the men's change of location worried Elana. She had watched enough crime shows to realize what may be happening. She soon didn't have to wonder as one of the men went behind the information desk and grabbed the woman. Once he had the woman secured he shouted to everyone in the bank, "If you do as you're told, no one will get hurt, ok?"

Elana froze in her seat. She was so frozen with fear that she didn't hear one of the men shouting for her to go over to where the other customers were. It took a nudge from the man who had been guarding the front door to make her take notice and do as she was told.

It was also at that moment that someone came through the front door of the bank as it was no longer being guarded by one of the men.

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	26. Chapter 26

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This chapter starts twenty minutes earlier to where the last chapter (25) ended.

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Ryan had decided to stay in the car while his step mom Elana ran into the bank. As he watched her walk toward the front door of the bank, he turned the radio on and leaned back in the passenger seat. He closed his eyes enjoying the music and the breeze that was flowing through the open windows of his car.

He may have fallen asleep if it wasn't for the noise coming from one of cars nearby. He opened his eyes and looked for the source. He stopped when he spotted 3 men standing around a truck that was only a few cars behind his. As he kept staring at them he noticed that they were walking his way, so he quickly turned his gaze away and hoped they didn't see him.

As they reached the side of his car he pretended he was reading something and it seemed like it worked as two of the walked by and headed toward the bank. The third one was lagging behind and as he passed Ryan's window he looked inside the car; making eye contact with Ryan. Luckily the guy kept going, but Ryan didn't like the look he saw on the man's face.

He continued to watch the men approach and eventually go inside the bank. There was something about them that he didn't feel good about and it suddenly made him think about the safety of his step mom. He didn't know why he felt this way, but he couldn't shake the feeling. He tried to think of something else, but his mind kept returning to Elana. He got out of his car and leaned against it as he tried to decide what to do. He looked back toward the truck the men had come out of and decided to go over and check it out. Maybe he was worried about nothing and the truck would reveal something about the men that would make him feel better.

He cautiously approached the truck and took a quick look inside. What he saw scared the hell out of him. He saw a shotgun resting in the front seat. He quickly looked back toward the bank and was even more scared for his step mom then before.

What was he going to do? His mind was suddenly blank and full of fear. He knew he couldn't go rushing in there to save Elana because it would probably get her killed, but he also knew he couldn't just stand there and do nothing.

He was starting to sweat and shake just thinking about it when his hand brushed against the cell phone in his pocket. As if instinct took over, he whipped his phone out and dialed Horatio's number. "Horatio, I don't know if I am just seeing things, but I think the Chase bank on 5th and Hanover is getting robbed".

"Where are you Ryan?"

"I'm standing outside of the bank, but my mom is inside. She's in there with them". He had not taken his eyes off the bank while he was talking and what he suddenly saw made him take the phone away from his face. He saw one of the men go up by the door and nervously look around outside before turning to face the inside of the bank. Ryan dropped the phone, never hearing Horatio as he uttered the words, "I want you to stay where you are, were on our way".

Ryan didn't know what had taken over, but he could not leave Elana alone. He ran over to his car as he suddenly remembered he kept a hidden gun in the back for emergencies. He opened the back and went straight to where it was hidden. If he had been asked a few minutes ago about the gun, he would have said he didn't know anything about it or where it was, but his memory felt clearer than it had in a long time.

He made his way to the front of the bank and tried to look inside, but he feared his presence would be noticed so he decided to hold back until he could think of something else to do. He was still thinking when he saw the guy guarding the door walk away. He had no time to talk himself out of what he did next. He used that exact moment to walk inside the bank.

-

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Along with everyone in the bank Elana looked up toward the front door as it opened. What she saw made her gasp, but luckily no one noticed. When the guys had taken over the bank she had been so glad that Ryan was safely inside his car that she really didn't care what happened to her, but now here he was. How could he have placed himself right in the middle of all of this?

She could only sit there and watch as one of the men ran over to Ryan and told him to get over by the other people. He was kind of rough with Ryan, shoving him toward the group of people huddled together. She tried to make eye contact with him, but failed. She also noticed that there seemed to be something in the way that he was carrying himself, it was almost as if he knew what he had been walking into, but the more she thought about it the sillier it became. She had spent the last week with him and knew that this would be the last thing he would have wanted to be involved in.

-

Ryan tried to get a good look at Elana without having anyone notice, but there were too many things in the way. He allowed the men in the bank to reclaim the situation while he joined the other hostages. He was pushed to the floor and made to sit next to a scared young girl and a middle aged man. There were a few people between him and Elana. In total there were 7 people in the bank.

At least there was one thing in his favor, Horatio knew what was happening and there were probably cops on their way here right now. He just hoped they got here soon before anything bad happened.

-

As he surveyed the layout of the bank he took note of where each of the robbers was located; one was by the door holding a gun, one was standing over them holding a gun and the third guy was behind the desk going through the drawers pulling out money. It wasn't long before the guy behind the counter ran out of money.

The guy left the counter and was soon standing in front of the middle age man, "You the manager of this place?"

The middle age man did look like the bank manager, but he didn't answer the man quickly enough and received a quick kick to the knee.

"I said are you the manager". The guy had no patience and was about to give the manager another kick when heard him start to talk.

"Yes, please, I'll do whatever you want. Just don't hurt me?"

The manager was roughly haled to his feet, "You're going to show me where the rest of the money is kept". He shoved the manager toward the back to where the vault was most likely kept.

With one less person between him and Elana, he took this time to steal a glance at her. She looked scared, but otherwise unharmed. He turned away before bringing undo attention toward her.

-

The 6 hostages were still sitting there waiting for the 7th to return from the back when a sudden noise erupted from outside.

Before anyone knew was what happening a voice was speaking over a bull horn; and the voice sounded very familiar to Ryan.

-

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After getting Ryan's call and then having the line go dead, Horatio took the threat very seriously. He called Frank Tripp and got together a team of police to accompany him to the bank. When they arrived it didn't take long to realize that it was indeed being robbed.

Horatio and the other officers discussed a game plan and it was decided that he would make their presence known. While speaking into a bull horn he shouted "We have the bank surrounded. If you come out right now and give yourselves up no one will get hurt".

This announcement caused quite a stir inside the bank as the guy who was hovering over the hostages ran to the door to look out. "Damn, how the hell did they know we were here?" He looked back at the hostages and yelled, "Did one of you hit the alarm button?" He walked back over to the hostages and demanded an answer "I said which one of you alerted the cops?"

No one was talking and this pissed the guy off. He suddenly grabbed the young woman who was one of the bank tellers, "Was it you, you had access to the button?"

The girl was scared and she was struggling in the man's strong grip. Ryan knew something needed to be done, but he was suddenly at a loss for ideas. He just sat there watching the guy shout at the girl and eventually throw her to the ground. "Well if she didn't do it then which one of you did?"

It was at that moment that that guy who was in the back with the manager made his way to the front, "what the hell is going on?" He shoved the manager back to the floor with the other hostages and went over to look out the bank door, "Damn, how did this happen? I go into the back for a few minutes and all hell breaks loose".

The guy who had been standing guard over the door said "What are we going to do. You said this was going to be a simple job and that we would get in and out of here with no trouble".

The guy who had been in the back suddenly hit the one by the door "Shut up John; just keep an eye on them and tell me if anything changes out there". He walked back to the hostages and his buddy who was keeping watch over them. "What the hell happened Fred?"

"I don't know, but no one here seems to want to talk". Fred used his shotgun to point at the bank teller, "I think she hit the alarm before we got her away from the counter".

Before they could say anything else they heard the voice over the bull horn again "If you don't come out, we will have no other choice but to take action and remove you by force is necessary".

The man who had been in the back and also seemed to be the leader went back to the door and nervously looked outside again, "Damn, this is not going as I planned it. We can't stay by door like this anymore. We're too easy of a target if we stay here". He grabbed John and the both of them walked back to Fred and the hostages.

John addressed their leader, "How are we going to get out of here now? This is so screwed up".

The leader looked at John and said "Shut up John, I'm trying to think. Fred, I want you to take one of the hostages into the back and see if there is a back door to this place".

"Why do I have to take anyone with me?"

"In case they have already found a way in here, a hostage would guarantee your way back here".

Fred was obviously not happy about this, but looked at the hostages to make his selection. His eyes selected on Elana, "Get up, your coming with me?"

Ryan's face went pale as he realized it was Elana that they wanted. He couldn't allow this to happened and stood up, "Take me instead; what do you want with her?"

"Why the hell would I want you?"

"If you run into trouble I can help you get back here. As long as your friends have their guns pointed at everyone else I will do as you're told?"

Fred thought about this and decided it sounded like a good idea, "Fine, get moving". He grabbed Ryan's arm and pushed him forward and toward the back.

-

As Ryan was led into the back he started thinking about his plan, he just didn't know if he was going to be able to pull it off.

Ryan and Fred went as far back as the building went and found that there was indeed a back door, but there was no sign of anyone having entered from the alley behind the building. Fred seemed to be relieved at this, "Well there isn't any signs of entry, but we are going to need to put something by the door to prevent it". Fred looked around and settled on a pair filing cabinets, "Here, help me move these over to the door, it won't stop them, but it will alert us and maybe buy us some time".

Ryan grabbed one side of the filing cabinet and helped him move it. Once the first one was in place they went over and started moving the second one. This is where Ryan saw his chance. Fred had his back to the door and Ryan used all of his strength to push the cabinet so that Fred became trapped in-between the door and the cabinet. As soon as he did this Fred was taken off guard long enough for Ryan to pull out the gun that was tucked behind his back.

Ryan pointed the gun directly at Fred and said "Make a sound and you're dead, understand?"

Fred stopped struggling and nodded his head.

Ryan kept his gun pointed at Fred while he made his way over to him. Not knowing what to do, he told Fred to turn around. As Fred did as he was told, Ryan used the handle of his gun and brought it down on the guys head, thus taking out his first man. That left 2 to go.

Ryan tied Fred up with some phone cords he found and shoved some rags into his mouth to keep him quiet. He then made his way back to the front, grabbing a few things along the way. He stopped before he entered the main room and watched the two men for a minute. He knew there was no going back now so he had to complete his plan if Elana and the other hostages were going to get out of the bank alive.

He started making some noise in order to get the two men's attention.

John and the leader both looked toward the back as they heard what sounded like a struggle. The leader shouted "Fred, what the hell is going on back there?"

When a reply didn't come the leader said to John, "go back there and see what the hell is going on".

John reluctantly made his way to the back. He had just gone through the door that led to the back when he felt something hit him over the head. He was on the ground before he had time to figure out what happened. As John lay on the ground he was about the shout to his leader when he felt another blow; this time however it made him black out.

Ryan tied John up the same way he had with Fred. Two down and one to go. For some reason Ryan felt the leader would not go down so easily.

-

The leader was started to get nervous as his two buddies had not yet returned. But he could not go back and check on them; he would risk losing control of the situation and the hostages.

-

Ryan could tell the leader was nervous, but truth be told, so was he. He looked around the room he was in for anything that might help. He was just about to give up on finding anything when he looked up at the sprinkler system. He kept staring at it and soon had to wonder if it would really work.

He had no time to think it through. All he could do was try, but he was starting to panic when he couldn't find what he needed. His final thought was to check John and was pleased to find what he needed was in John's back pocket.

With matches in hand he set off the fire alarm which in turn started the sprinkler. The leader did exactly what Ryan was hoping he would do; and that was to look away from the hostages and stare up at the ceiling.

Ryan dove for the leader and knocked him down to the floor where the 2 of them started to fight on the ground. Before anyone in the room knew what was going it, a loud gunshot emanated from the two fighting men causing both of them to stop moving.

-

-

-

Elana was packing up her things she had brought to Ryan's condo just a few weeks ago. She still couldn't believe everything that had gone since she had arrived, but her mind kept going back to the day at the bank. This day was the hardest time to comprehend at what happened and it would stay with her for the rest of her life.

The young man she had come to stay with only 2 weeks ago was gone forever.

-

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After the bank issue Horatio was surprised at everything that had happened afterward. It was something that he didn't quite understand until Dr. Kelger had explained it.

Dr. Kelger had said that Ryan had finally worked out his problems which allowed him to get past his fear and enter the bank to save his mother. After all these years of feeling guilty, he finally saved his mother; he rid himself of the guilt.

-

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-

Ryan was feeling great. Ever since he stepped out of the bank he felt something he had not felt in a long time. He felt like himself, however with all the activity that was going on after the hostages were released no one realized that Ryan finally had his memory back. It wasn't until several days later that he mentioned it to his doctor. He was afraid of saying anything for fear of waking up the next day and forgetting it all over again. Dr. Kelger evaluated him and after a few days declared his mind was healthy. Ryan was so excited that he had Horatio over for dinner and told both him and Elana what the doctor had said.

Ryan was still unable to return to work until the doctor cleared him, but it eventually happened 3 weeks after the bank robbery.

It may have taken awhile, but Ryan knew that everything which had occurred after the bus crash was meant to happen. He didn't know if there were any lingering problems from the crash and the doctor had not given him a 100% guarantee that his memory would not play tricks on him again, but he was confident that he had overcame something which he had so long ago forgotten.

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Author's note: well this story is now complete. The ending may not be exactly what I had envisioned when I first started this story and I could have probably let the story drag on bit after the bank robbery, but I felt I was done telling the tale and it was time to end the story.

Thanks to everyone who has read my story. I really appreciated all the reviews. I hope to see many of you give my other stories a chance. I plan on trying to write several different types of stories; al l of which will involve Ryan.


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